<p>I have worked at a research center for almost two years.</p>
<p>It's expected that RA's will end up going to grad school. So there is no negativity about the situation, and unlike several RA's that left this year for school, I have stayed for the "promised" two years. </p>
<p>One of my bosses said that she "was more than happy!" to write me a letter of recommendation, and request that I send her my CV and SOP. She said she would review my SOP as well.</p>
<p>She sent in my recommendation which I know from the application website, but never said anything in person or by email about my SOP. I received no feedback or suggestions.</p>
<p>I have worked hard for this investigator, taking over additional duties on the studies that I work on with her in the past when our project director abruptly left, and helping out on her other study which I'm not even officially on when an RA also left suddenly.</p>
<p>She's not the type of person to forget to do things, and I'm trying not to take it personally, but feel hurt. Why offer to do something, and then not do it, especially when I have consistently worked so hard to help her over the past two years? At our last study meeting she also made a rude comment towards me out of the blue in front of several other RA's. </p>
<p>It may be possible that she doesn’t realize you’re expecting feedback on your SOP. If someone had said that to me, I would probably have interpreted that to mean that she’s going to review my SOP to get a better idea of what I’d like to study in grad school or my background that makes me a good candidate for grad school (which would be helpful when writing my letter of rec). I don’t know if I would have expected any feedback at all, but if that’s the way she intended it, it may also be a “no news is good news” situation. It’s possible that she may have read your SOP and didn’t think anything was glaringly amiss with it, so she didn’t say anything about it.</p>
<p>I wouldn’t take it too personally, and I think you may be reading too much into the situation. Have you tried asking about it? A simple “Did you happen to have a chance to look over my SOP? I’m getting ready to submit it in my applications, and I was wondering if you had any suggestions.” should be fine.</p>
<p>It’s also entirely possible that what you interpreted as a “rude comment” she interpreted as a joke. Is she the type to joke with and poke fun at people? It’s possible that she feels close enough to joke around with you. I’ve known a lot of people in academia who are like that.</p>
<p>I would not be terribly concerned. When I contacted my LoR writers, I provided my SoP and asked that they review it to get a more complete idea of my background and goals. I can’t remember exactly how I worded it, but it was similar to what you described, and I did not receive or expect actual feedback on the SoP. </p>
<p>Chances are, your LoR writer has been in this situation before, and assumed that you were not expecting feedback on the statement itself. Don’t sweat it too much.</p>
<p>“It may be possible that she doesn’t realize you’re expecting feedback on your SOP. If someone had said that to me, I would probably have interpreted that to mean that she’s going to review my SOP to get a better idea of what I’d like to study in grad school or my background that makes me a good candidate for grad school (which would be helpful when writing my letter of rec).” baktrax is very right. </p>
<p>What I’ll add is to never assume the worst about another person’s motivations without cause. There is nothing to be gained from doing that. 9 times out of 10, these situations are caused by miscommunications or innocent oversight. If you would like foodback, simply write the individual “I saw you submitted my letter of recommendation. Thanks very much! If you can find a moment, I’d appreciate it if you could offer some feedback on my SOP as well.”</p>
<p>Maybe she just forgot or other things took precedence. If you really want the feedback, just ask her casually if she has any suggestions for improving it because you are about to submit it. I am often in this position as an undergraduate advisor and i always tell the students to remind me. I never get offended.</p>