hi, I know I’ve been here a lot but like for the past couple of weeks, I just don’t feel motivated to do anything especially my summer hw which is a heck of a ton bc of me doing full IB next year. On top of that I still have a online math course I have to finish in two weeks in order to take math SL next year. I emailed to see if I can change it to Math Studies but like they havent replied yet and that means I’ll have to do the math course which I don’t even know why I took. I thought I could handle it but no. So basically I have two weeks left and so so much work to do but my brain is just stressing out instead of actually doing it. I’ve been procrastinating to try to forget about it and I just keep overthinking stuff. I just don’t know about my life right now. On top of that, I’m dreading my new school year bc I’m usually a quiet person so people sorta see me as a loner and I don’t feel comfortable speaking in class and i don’t have many close friends so I really don’t have a stable friend group. I’m just really stressed. On top of that I’ve been pushing off my drivetimes because I’m scared of driving and I feel like I can’t do anything right. I’m almost a junior and I feel like my sister who’s in 8th grade is more productive than me and she is. College is a whole another story. My parents think if I can’t get into at least OSU or a 50% acceptance rate school then I’m stupid. Also my pACT scores are so bad I don’t think I’ll even get a 29. Sorry for the rant. idk. My life is just really idek right now.
I am wondering if you have some anxiety or depression…talk to your parents about going to the doctor about it.
if that doesn’t work you need an accountability partner. That is, somebody who will check up on you and makesure you are doing your math homework. could be a friend or family member.
You are not alone. A lot of kids facing the start of another school year are having the same thoughts and feelings of dread. Many worry that they are not smart enough or that they don’t have a good enough group of friends. And I can assure you that loads of them have procrastinated on their summer homework. You are feeling down right now, but things will get better. Maybe when school starts you will meet someone else who feels a bit lost and needs a friend to commiserate with.
For now, just try to take care of things that are most important to get done quickly, and put others, like driving, aside for the time being. If finishing the math course is critical, see if you can get a tutor right away to help. (I love the suggestion above about an accountability partner.) If you can, force yourself to do a 30 minute session on the math, then take a break, and then try another 30 minutes, and so on.
At some point, discuss with your parents what some of the different choices are when it comes to selecting colleges and community colleges. If they don’t think that there is any choice other than OSU, then discuss it with a counselor at school or a caring teacher. One way to alleviate anxiety about the future is to figure out several paths that could work.
I have to wonder why you are planning to do full IB. To me this seems like a lot of stress for relatively minor or no gain. You can get into many very good universities with only a handful of AP classes and no IB, or even with no AP classes. I think that you should seriously consider taking an easier load this upcoming school year (or at least easier than full IB). You do not need IB at all to get into The Ohio State University, or other good schools.
Also, I think that you should be evaluated for depression. The time to do this is as soon as possible. The medical profession has gotten a lot better about dealing with depression. Many very highly intelligent and very highly capable people have suffered from depression. Doctors can help you a lot in most cases.
i think for me it seemed right since i kept thinking i don’t have spectacular ec’s so i have to have something impressive on my app to get in. I’ve been thinking of getting evaluated but my family ( i don’t know if being asian has something to do with it) are very against mental illness and everytime i have an episode and stop functioning and stress, my grandma who i am very close to me will always comfort me but she will always say that you can’t have an illness and try not to do this next time. My mom always tell me not stress and that she’ll get really really really mad if I actually become depressed. So, i feel really stressed to talk about my condition with counselors especially bc I’m afraid they will tell my parents and my parents will be mad.
Don’t listen to your grandma…she is wrong.
Your mother is wrong too…“Don’t get depressed or I’ll get mad?” what are you supposed to do with that?
There are 3000 colleges in the USA…you can get into one without IB.
By posting here you are taking a brave step towards taking control of how you feel and getting better. You are not alone. What you are describing sounds very normal and beyond just dreading another school year.
Talk, talk and then talk some more. Explain to your mother that you don’t want to be depressed (or anxious, stressed, etc whatever word she accepts best) but that you need help. She is your mother and loves you and will want to help. Seek out someone you can share your thoughts with and discuss behaviors that will help. Almost every school and community has resources available.
Again you are brave to recognize that how you are feeling is negatively impacting you. You are even more courageous by saying something here. Go a small step further and get someone in person to talk to.
As far as college I will go cliche and say it will work out. I swear it always does!
Good luck
“so i have to have something impressive on my app to get in.”
To go anywhere outside of the top 4 to 10 schools, you don’t need to be perfect. There are hundreds if not thousands of universities in the US which provide very strong education and whose graduates can be very successful in life.
The Ohio State University has nearly 60,000 students at its main campus, and over 66,000 students across all campuses. They do not have this many perfect applicants. Many of these students got in with very little in the way of ECs, with some B’s mixed in with their A’s, and with only a tiny handful of AP classes or no AP classes in some cases, and with no thought of ever taking IB. There are of course hundreds of other very good universities in the US and there are not enough perfect students to fill up more than a tiny fraction of the freshman class at these schools. Normal humans can do very well. 
@Nocreativity1 gives some very good advice above. What you are suffering from is sadly very common in the US. We put way too much stress on our high school students. Doctor’s can help you a lot. Doctor’s and counselors and psychologists and psychiatrists are also very used to speaking with parents and helping parents understand the situation. Stepping back to a less stressful high school schedule should also help.
Thank you all for the wonderful responses and the advice! I will take in consideration of the advice. Although indeed IB will not be good for my mental health, I will still plan of taking it because it’s an opportunity that I don’t want to miss. I have also heard that people come out very rounded at the end and it will benefit them a lot on their work ethic in college. Sorry to disappoint but I will keep going down on this path. I think that it’ll still be hard talking about my mental health to my family but i will keep on trying and hopefully get professional help soon.
I don’t mean to be insulting, but it sounds like you could really use counselling. I’m serious. I had plenty of stress, and my counselor helped me work through it. Have your parents made remarks about the whole selectivity thing? If so, I would ask them to tone it down, maybe with something like “In order to get into a good college in the future, I have to be focused on the now.” But again, I’m no professional, just a high school student. You should REALLY ask your counselor about this. I would also suggest picking up some kind of exercise hobby or yoga; I found it really helped with my stress.
I am a student that has also struggled with stress and a lack of motivation.
I recommend taking a short break from studying to do the following:
Write down your 3 top values in life at the moment and write down the 3 top things you spend your life on. Rank the values and the time spent.
It really helps to give some perspective on schoolwork. For me, I realized that I wanted my life to not revolve around school and homework, so I changed my priorities to engage in other activities. Don’t let one letter grade define you. Think about it- your shoe size can be measured with a number, but your potential in life and your intelligence cannot. It will take active change on your part, but it will be worth it. Good luck