<p>Hello Everybody! I am new to the forum after researching Parent Plus Loans. My children have been out of college for some time now and into their prospective careers. Now that it's time to pay their PPL they tell my husband & I they can't afford to! When it was time to fill out FAFSA's and complete all of the fun financial aid papers, they would have a fit if we didn't sign the PPL. We were always a middle class to upper middle class family. We did not have funds put aside for college education. Parent Plus Loans were needed for our kids to go college to get their degrees in what they wanted. My husband has retired from his job of 40 yrs. and now works part-time. I work p.t. also. My children are giving us a hard time paying this to us so we can make the payment! I do not want this to cause bad circumstances in our family, which it is beginning to.
Is anyone else experiencing this? and is there a resolution?
Thank you!</p>
<p>Parent PLUS loans belong to the parents. If you had an agreement with your children that they would pay you back, that was an informal agreement and you can’t enforce it. You are responsible, and it seems you made a big mistake when you took out the loans.</p>
<p>"they would have a fit if we didn’t sign the PPL. "</p>
<p>so, is that how they got their way while growing up? </p>
<p>Why don’t you “have a fit” that they won’t pay for those loans? What will THEY do if you “have a fit”?</p>
<p>Sorry, but as the parents, you should have been wearing the big boy and big girl pants and said, “no.” Those loans are LEGALLY yours. </p>
<p>“they tell my husband & I they can’t afford to!”</p>
<p>^^ That is the answer you should have told THEM when they wanted you to take out unaffordable Plus loans.</p>
<p>You need to sit them down and be frank with them. It sounds like they were expected to pay back these loans, and now they won’t. </p>
<p>Are they saying that they can’t pay ANYTHING towards these loans? Or can they at least pay some? </p>
<p>I think they know that you won’t make a big deal out of this, so they don’t have motivation to pay. </p>
<p>Wow that really sucks.
I thought this thread was going to be about how Plus loans are not a great deal.
I also think they encourage people to take out more than they can afford.
Which gets lost in the excitement of planning for college.
How much were the Plus loans?
Were their Stafford loans subsidized?</p>
<p>"My children are giving us a hard time paying this to us so we can make the payment! "</p>
<p>Can you clarify the above?</p>
<p>How much are these Plus Loans?</p>
<p>did your children go to a community college for their first two years?</p>
<p>Did they commute to their local state universities?</p>
<p>What were their majors? </p>
<p>It’s always tough when the piper comes to call. I agree, it’s time to sit down with your kids and have the real hard talk that probably should have occurred before they went to college but hindsight doesn’t help here. How you resolve this is up to you, but I do think your kids need to contribute something toward those bills if that was your well articulated and verbally agreed to arrangement.</p>
<p>Parent Plus Loans are the sole loans of the PARENT. They are not even cosigned by the student. When you took the Plus Loans, they became YOUR responsibility to repay. Did you get a written, notarized agreement that this money was a loan you were making your child? Even with that, you could be in a position where you would have to pursue litigation to get repayment.</p>
<p>Also…please clarify…you say your kids are having trouble giving you this money. Are they giving you the money with grumping…or are they NOT giving you the money at all?</p>
<p>You also say “the loans were needed to go to college to get the degrees they wanted”. To other new parents reading this…there are almost ALWAYS affordable option. Students can get college degrees in any number of affordable ways. Taking out a Plus Loan is a CHOICE. </p>
<p>That’s the problem with loans–they have to be repaid and when it’s time, it’s very common that no one wants to ante up.</p>
<p>You and your husband need to get the options for repayment on these loans, and list them. You then should sit down with each of your kids and tell them, it’s time to pay the piper. Let them know what the payment options are. </p>
<p>If they flat out refuse to pay, or they cannot pay, then whoever signed for these loans, you or your husband, or however you work it out, have to come to some agreement with the lenders, because they are your loans. Goes on your credit record. </p>
<p>I have a very dear friend who is way over her head with loans she cosigned with her DD. Her DD is equally responsible for repayment, but the fact of the matter is that she isn’t making enough money to pay. She’s not even making ends meet for her current bills. She’s flat broke and worse, as she’s in the hole for quite a bit, and that isn’t including this devastating amount of student loans. It has wrecked my friend’s credit history and her business opportunities as she cannot pay either. She can’t even make the interest payments so the outstanding balance is ballooning. </p>
<p>See what you can work out with your kids. They are certainly not going to be happy about paying this, but that isn’t the issue. IT’s getting them to pay the loans. You may have to pitch in or pay it all if they are not willing and/or able to do so. That’s the commitment you made. It’s too bad that your kids are not keeping their commitments, but the loans were not made with that condition built in there.</p>
<p>All involved need to come to the table with their budgets in hand…how much comes in, how much HAS to go out. I suspect that the kids have good jobs and are living the way they want, and then POOF, no money leftover to give to parents to make the payments. </p>
<p>The mom and dad need “to have a fit”. The kids need to know that:</p>
<p>A) their behavior will have damaging affects on the family.</p>
<p>B) could have damaging affects on their parents’ health from stress trying to pay these loans.</p>
<p>C) they obviously are reneging on a “family agreement” to repay those loans.</p>
<p>These kids have run the parents by the nose, convincing them that these loans were needed to get their degrees at the colleges that they wanted to go to. I highly doubt that these kids’ career choices required them to attend THOSE particular schools. Although the parents have no legal leverage on these kids, they do have some emotional leverage and they should use it. </p>
<p>At a minimum, the payback should be shared between parents and child. I don’t think it’s too far-fetched to think that the kids somehow are rationalizing this by thinking, “well my parents just borrowed the amount that they should have paid for anyway.” They’re not realizing that they wouldn’t have been allowed to go to those schools if the parents knew that they would have had to pay these loans back. These kids aren’t realizing that they weren’t “owed” those particular schools. </p>
<p>I hope that any parent reading this thread who is contemplating doing these loans with the idea that the child will pay them back (or share the burden) will see how bad that can be. </p>
<p>Yes, entitlement from ones kids can be a reality check and a brutal slap in the face. I’ve had a taste of that, though not to this degree at all. I just assumed, and I think a lot of parents assumed the same, that it’ s all one family and we all pull together. My parents did not have a lot of money or income, and my brothers and I were acutely aware of this. We were sending them money and gifts to enhance their standard of living as early as we could. We LOVED helping them out. Even now, my mother is living with us, and we subsidize, and my brothers cannot write a check fast enough, are eager to hear of any gifts, or needs they can cover and hop over here in drop of the hat if Mom needs or wants anything. And, my mother was no jewel or paragon of virtue as a parent, I can assure you. But that’s the relationship that was created. To stick this woman with our school loans or any of our financial issues is unthinkable to me, and to my brothers.</p>
<p>But our kids don’t necessarily think that way. We had a rather heated discussion, with one son about deductibles in health insurance, and other costs not met by it. He had no idea how health insurance worked and was appalled at the thought that he owed for some medical costs. He’s under 26 so that he’s still on company health insuracne, which is fine, but that does not mean WE, the parents have to pay the cost incurred before and after the insurance kicks in. Our fault, in some ways, for not explaining this, but man, the reaction really cut into me. And our kids, in general, are very close to us and want to help us. But there is also that feeling of entitlement there, that I’m sure we had a heavy hand in creating, that because we are reasonably well to do by their standards, and by precedent, and by their peers’ precedents, we should be paying for some of their things. Some kids get it in their heads that it was the parents’ responsibility to pay for college, that “everyone” elses’ parents have paid, and legally since the loans are fully in the parent’s name, it’ s the parents’ load. Too bad about payback. </p>
<p>So some meeting and explanation of the financial situation needs to be shared, and hopefully the kids understand the hardship it would put on you to take on these loans, and some repayment schedule can be arranged. Good luck.</p>
<p>I think the OP and her H need to show how THEY can’t afford these loans. They are probably like many senior citizens who aren’t living high on the hog, clubbing, etc, and every extra penny is going towards those loans. While their kids, who sound entitled, probably think nothing of doing things like, going to Starbucks, lunches out with co-workers, fun on weekends, new clothes, mani-pedis, gym memberships, pricey hair salons, etc. </p>
<p>Once those things are pointed out, the kids will be hard-pressed to say that they can’t afford to pay while their Golden Years’ parents don’t have any discretionary dollars.</p>
<p>It’s time for some heavy Mom Guilt. It’s time for the, “we agreed to do this so that YOU could go to the schools of your choice. You agreed to pay these loans back. This is hurting us both financially and emotionally (and probably health-wise). We need to work something out and share this burden.” If each kid paid at least 50%, then that would likely make a huge difference.</p>
<p>I may be speculating too much, but I don’t think the mom would have posted if the kids were really barely making it…because she would then know that they can’t pay back those loans.</p>
<p>PLUS becomes due six months after cessation of full time studies, is my understanding. The OP says that it 's been a while now. Has OP been paying on these loans? Are they now delinquent? Also, is this something that was not brought up to the kids, like did the parents take out these loans without sitting down and explaining to the kids that these loans are what are making the schools possible. </p>
<p>The kids may have had no idea about these loans and made financial decisions and commitments without them in the picture, and now Parents are saying, “About these loans…”</p>
<p>But if parents are having trouble paying, family discussion is in order. </p>
<p>Good point. How long have these students been out of college…and who started paying the debt back when the lPlus Loan repayment was due? The OP says the kids have been out of college for some time and are into their prospective careers. This suggests it has been longer than 6 months since college graduation.</p>
<p>Hard to see the full stories from these posts which are just bytes into the situation, but it seems to me that the parents were paying and now they are having financial hardships and want the kids to assume those payments. This might well be news to them, and frankly, though I was always personally always ready and willing to help out my parents, I would not have been pleased, or be pleased now to find there are are some loans made on my behalf years ago that my parents now want me to assume, right out of the blue. It would cause some issues financially for us, as we would not have prepared for this, and if the amounts are substantial hurt us in some thing that we did plan for. </p>
<p>"My children have been out of college for some time now and into their prospective careers. **Now that it’s time to pay their PPL ** they tell my husband & I they can’t afford to! "</p>
<p>Sybbie, you’re right that we don’t have much info to go on.</p>
<p>My feeling from the above quote was that the agreement was that the parents would pay for a set number of years (maybe 2? 3?) to allow the newish grads to get on their feet, and then the kids were supposed to start giving the parents a monthly payment that would be put towards the loan…and that time has come (and gone) and the children are claiming that they can’t afford to give the parents any money towards these loans. </p>