<p>Stillwater - Oberlin is my alma mater and tho I graduated in '86, I am pretty sure some things haven’t changed completely. People like to discuss politics over coffee, or discuss Kant over breakfast, sometimes with their professors, they bike everywhere (town is 2 blocks square and flat, so it isn’t that tough!) There are no TAs/GAs - I had full professors from day one. The conservatory and the college coexist but don’t as much intermingle, if you know what I mean. Professors don’t just give out their office hours, they give you their home address and their home phone #s. They ask if you can babysit their kids. My frosh english class was a seminar of 10 kids, not the 500-person auditorium style classes my friends at Cornell, Penn St. enjoyed. Oberlin is good with merit aid, they are good people all around in admin, never had an issue with people being helpful and patient. That being said, it was a place where to be unique was to be normal and to be normal was to stick out like a sore thumb. I wasn’t as granola/hippy as much of my friends - though I tried. When I went to grad school, Oberlin, was recognized and really respected. When I looked for work, no prestige at all - I could’ve gone to a local tier 3 and be given the same typing test. I am not sure the same could be said for a Stanford grad, but I know nothing about Stanford. Weather wise, it snows alot in Ohio and it’s flat as a pancake. And don’t even get me started on Cleveland!
Did someone offer red wine? Don’t mind if I do!</p>
<p>I could use some red wine too… 
Waiting for S to come back from his chamber music class, so we can all have dinner together and discuss the college selection to death, hahaha.</p>
<p>A friend just sent me this. I thought it was very appropriate to ‘share with the group’. </p>
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<p>I love having each of you to share this part of the journey with!! :)</p>
<p>^^Very true^^Please pass the red wine :)</p>
<p>Gmom~ sending hugs</p>
<p>:cool:</p>
<p>Guitarist’s-mom, I’m right there with you. D rejected from Amherst today too. We’re both pretty surprised that she was not accepted into ANY of the east coast colleges she applied to. But I know she’ll be happy where she lands, and it will be a great fit for her (which is something I was worried about with the east coast schools).</p>
<p>Hang in there, and pass the drinks. I’ll take champagne to celebrate this whole college admissions thing, AND my last day of work, being DONE. :)</p>
<p>Guitarist’s mom and oregonianmom ~ Sorry about Amherst…
oregonianmom ~ Lifting my glass to your last day of work, yay! :)</p>
<p>I have really appreciated the debriefing going on here with parents sharing views on what may account for beating-the-odds with the lottery school admissions.</p>
<p>My own sons have had wonderful results, with S2 being admitted to 11/13 selective (not ivy high) universities but also to 6/6 extremely selective majors or specialty programs within various universities. His interests did not lead him to the ivies–mostly because he is so “pointy” (love that term) that he dreamed of attending more arts or pre-professional focused programs rather than those tip-top colleges that are renowned for liberal arts. But even with his good grades, scores, etc, he might not have seen such good results at schools that were not looking for his kind of pointiness.</p>
<p>With such long odds of acceptance at such tiny programs (USC School of Cinematic Arts has 5% admission rate for example), we felt he was essentially throwing darts (well, darts that took weeks to construct–meaning all the time he spent designing art portfolios/supplements etc). It came as a wonderful shock that he got into all of the programs. So here’s my chance to share my thoughts on why my talented kid (among so MANY wonderful talented kids) has such great decisions:</p>
<p>First, his entire application from LoRs to essays to ECs to out-of-school summer activities to his artwork itself, pretty much told the same story. He must have showed up as not only creative, but also driven and focused–which he is. But so are others! It’s just that he made sure his essays reinforced those aspects in his character that explain why he loves design. He only chose ECs throughout HS that he loved, and they were not well-rounded. He held no leadership positions. When he looked at the Common App section for ECs he wrote about the gallery exhibitions his art had been in, the time he spent outside of class painting, the play he wrote that won a large competition. I suspect his art teacher who wrote a LOR also mentioned how many nights she would sit in the art studio while S2 was painting. It all added up.</p>
<p>Second, he had his own unique teeny tiny niche and it’s likely that less 17-year olds were so uber-focused. If any of you have seen the musical “Avenue Q” you may remember the song “Purpose” which embodies the idea that everyone must have a purpose, only the protagonist had no idea of what his was. This was my dear S2–who watched his older brother know exactly what he wanted to pursue from day one. So all through HS, S2 fretted and wondered what his purpose was. All this time, he worked on his art, acted in school for plays, wrote some, too It took him literally until this past summer (when he was contemplating a major in architecture) to get the maturity to figure out who he really wanted to be. Not a second too soon! His entire list was thrown out in November. I was a frazzled mess. And his realization led him to write applications that felt very genuine. He truly believed in what he wanted to do. So lucky. Not every kids gets to that point, of course, at this young age. </p>
<p>Third, he has worked very hard in school–a top private prep that is demanding. I believe that his ability to get great grades in such a difficult curriculum may have stood out among a pool of arts applicants who may have been so focused on arts ECs that their grades were not as high. You all may recall that dear S2 has test issues!! With a re-take (the horror!) of the SAT, he struck gold. That happened in December. Among arts majors, this may have brought favorable attention–but who knows? Didn’t hurt. ;)</p>
<p>I’ve gone on too long. But I’ll add a fourth point. Do something unexpected for your average great high school student. S2 took a grad class and designed a resort–most fun he ever had. I just want to suggest those with younger kids to encourage your student to look outside the box for activities that interest them. It may be much more valuable to work with a lady who runs an inner city dance studio (as opposed to being another girl in the HS dance ensemble) , write your own iPhone app (instead of just taking a programming class at the JC), or do research with a university professor over the summer (instead of working as a lifeguard) in order to have a way to demonstrate initiative, drive, talent and uniqueness–when the application is weighed against hundreds of girls in dance clubs and boys who lifeguard.</p>
<p>Sorry to go on and on. The selectivity is crazy and not just with the “lottery” schools. Each great kid should really SHOW who they are by going (a little) against the crowd.</p>
<p>Thanks for your thoughts. It seems to be an interesting time on this thread- reflections and wisdom being shared. It is hard to say goodbye to schools your child likes and you have laid out thoroughly in your mind.</p>
<p>For myself, I think a person in this economy needs to choose the school that lets you and your family get away with the least amount of debt. But I notice that many of your children are accepted to schools that are very, very similar to the <em>other</em> schools your child has been accepted to. You and they chose well. Unfortunately, now that decision time is upon us, the schools are perhaps so similar that it is hard to decide. </p>
<p>If it comes down to it that you cannot decide between two excellent options – that neither school is offering significantly better FA or offers a noticeably preferential anything (distance, degree, weather, etc) – then it’s time to flip a coin.</p>
<p>Not to decide but for your child to clarify his/her feelings. Let’s say you must decide between College A and College C. After long debate, you have come to the conclusion that either school is adequate for the need. More debate will just have you running in circles. Pull out your ‘lucky’ half dollar. College A is Heads, College C is tails. You flip! Tails comes up. Now either the kid will say “yes!” or he’ll say ‘2 out of 3?’ Either way, you have the answer. </p>
<p>Sometimes we get so tangled up in shoulds, coulds and woulds, that we need to cut through all that with a simpler system.</p>
<p>Thanks -madbean- for your insight and thoughts about your S2’s ‘luck’</p>
<p>Novelisto–will have to remember your thoughts on simplifying the decision if we are lucky enough to have several good finaid pkgs</p>
<p>Ooops–and O-Mom-- Congrats! on your last day at work, hopefully Spring shows up eventually here in the PNW for your ‘life of leisure’ for the next few months</p>
<p>I need help! I was accepted in 11 out of 12 colleges I applied(Harvard Rejection). I have been able to narrow down to 4: Wesleyan University, Johns Hopkins, Brown and Tufts. I’m thinking about majoring in Neuroscience…any advice? I’m extremely stressed because I do not want to make the wrong decision…which will make my future easier and brighter? Thank you so much in advance for all your opinions!</p>
<p>oh and I know I’m not a parent but I need a knowledgeable parent’s opinion since my mom does not understand much about this process or these schools</p>
<p>timedout…how do finances factor in? have you discussed that with your parents…for most of us it is at least a factor that must be taken into consideration. May help narrow things down for you…</p>
<p>The other day I mentioned that both of my kids received an academic scholarship from my H’s employer. Today we found out how much the scholarship is. I was expecting maybe $500-1000 each. It is $4,000 each!!! Woo hoo! 
:D</p>
<p>oh oh oh o-mom!! This is stupendous news. Soo happy for you.</p>
<p>Stillwater, that’s a really tough call. I know a couple of current Oberlin undergrads, and they are remarkable young people who love the school and are basically seeing their dreams come true. As someone else said, it’s not like comparing a state U with an elite. They are both superb schools.</p>
<p>And $72K is a whole lot of money, a whole whole lot.</p>
<p>That said, there are many Stanford alums in my California town, and they are such smart and well-rounded and successful people, and you cannot discount the Stanford connections, especially in California. </p>
<p>I would agonize over that decision, too, but would probably suggest this: Take the scholarship, go to Oberlin, shine there, and go to Stanford or some such for grad school.</p>
<p>On the morning D2 was admitted to Duke, H found out he has to go to Durham for business on Monday for the first time ever. A sign? A tease? D2 is going to meet up with her dad on Monday so the two of them can visit the campus. It won’t be the admitted days event, but it was sort of two for the price of one.</p>
<p>Tonight the junior class hosted a dessert for the seniors. Afterward, the seniors are going to Sky High for trampoline jumping. D2, who is student body president, was looking forward to going to an event someone else had to plan! </p>
<p>Congrats on the great scholarships, Omom. Is Willamette still in the running fpr D? A good friend of D2’s has Willamette as one of her top two choices. H’s much younger cousin graduated from Willamette a few years ago. Met his wife there. She’s now a doctor. He has started his own business and has a band. It seems like they have done very well.</p>
<p>phbmom- Interesting coincidence that H has to go to Durham on business! Glad your D can go with him.</p>
<p>Yes, Willamette is her top choice at this point - just waiting for admitted student’s day and an overnight in the dorm next week to solidify her decision. She’s going there tomorrow for her boyfriend’s track meet, so it will be good to see the campus on a weekend, too.</p>
<p>o-mom-wow, great news!</p>