<p>My S apparently did not opt out of mail. Most of his mail has been general information about colleges. Some of them say “Since you are a high achiever” or “Because of your high PSAT score” etc., but only a couple have been for summer programs and the like. And they are all too expensive for us. I don’t think any of this info was exclusive to him - you could find the same info on the internet. In short, I doubt that your DS is missing anything but a lot of junk mail.</p>
<p>Longhaul: A big hug…
Cyclone: Welcome …Like you, I just found out this thread a month ago…and just figuring out what I missed…I am happy that I found it now at least.</p>
<p>Mum: I told my D to check the box having been through this once. I’ll make sure she does what she has to do to encourage the mail when she takes them “for real” in the fall. That’s early enough to get all that junk. </p>
<p>Read an interesting article today about the marketing company that does a lot of the mailing (both print and e) for colleges today: [ROYALL</a> & COMPANY - The Choice Blog - NYTimes.com](<a href=“http://thechoice.blogs.nytimes.com/tag/royall-company/]ROYALL”>Royall & Company - The Choice Blog - The New York Times)</p>
<p>And since we were talking about SAT II’s and what to do: <a href=“The New Subject-Test Math: 2 = 3 - The New York Times”>The New Subject-Test Math: 2 = 3 - The New York Times;
<p>Is Kelowna ever going to come back and finish the story???</p>
<p>My son finished his JV basketball season and got to go up to Varsity for CIF (playoffs). The team lost by 10 points and my son got to play the last 24 seconds. He got a shot off that hit the rim but barely missed. He was happy. I am just glad the size XXL uniform he was wearing (he is 5’6" 120 lbs) didn’t fall off! Now it is on to the Spring sports. He is going to try and do tennis and track both. We will see how it works out.</p>
<p>@MumTo3 My son actually received an email from Collegeboard saying he either didn’t select Student Search or failed to give them an email address. Doesn’t make sense since they obviously have his email. Anyway, you can call collegeboard and opt in to the Student Search. If you have a choice of prompts when you call, select admissions and recruitment. They just ask for the student’s name and address to look it up in their records.</p>
<p>D signed up for classes this week. She planned to take 5 AP classes, a required honors class and one elective (journalism 2 or photography). GC met with D and 6 other kids at same time and registered her for her desired classes except AP Statistics instead of the elective. D is happy with the change to AP Stats. Her classes are:</p>
<p>AP Stats
AP Calc AB
AP US History
AP English
AP Spanish
AP Chemistry
Required Course for Juniors</p>
<p>D is an exceptional student and is excited about this schedule but I’m concerned about the load. Any suggestions on how to determine if this is reasonable? D is also on varsity and year-round club teams. I want D to have rigorous schedule be challenged don’t want her to struggle or become a zombie. I have no faith in the GC or school administration.</p>
<p>It depends on how your daughter is doing this year as sophomore. I try not to overload my daughter when scheduling her classes. With one AP this year, she usually goes to bed around twelve. Next year she will take 3 APs and my guess is that she will go to bed around 2:00 A.M. Most kids at her school already complain about having no sleep.</p>
<p>Bappy, have your D ask other students in those classes the level of difficulty. My D is planning to take 4 AP classes next year. Originally she thought about adding a 5th, but decided to wait. The class that makes me concerned is AP Physics B. I am waiting to get feedback on how difficult the class. Worst case she will drop it next year and do an easier science. I don’t want her stressing too much. I just want her to do well and continue to enjoy high school.</p>
<p>WHen my older son was a junior he took 4APs, SPanish 3 and 2 fairly high maintenance sports. It was pretty brutal, and he didn’t get a whole lot of sleep.</p>
<p>Bappy: My older D had 3 APs in junior year, with heavy ECs. That was plenty for her. S’13 will have 3 APs as well (had 2 as sophomore), plus the same heavy ECs. But, I think it really depends on what is typical for your school. If the other kids are taking 6 or 7 AP’s then maybe they are not quite as labor intensive as they might be at other schools. I don’t think a GC would push a child into something that is not achievable. (But, I may be wrong!)</p>
<p>One of those busy days today…S’13 has a voice competition at 10am and then a piano competition at 11:30 an hour away. He’s just going to have to sing and run - but his voice teacher will call and tell us his scores. Luckily, voice isn’t like piano, where, if you score high enough, you have to come back in the evening for a recital. Looks like I’m going to be doing a lot of driving today! Plus, my parents want us to come over for dinner (and fix their wireless Internet!). Where does my Saturday go?</p>
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<p>Thank you all for your responses. It seems like you all are mirroring my thoughts. Daughter is breezing through school this year but has only 1 AP class (AP Euro). Going from 1 to 6 is a BIG jump so it is hard to predict based on this year. D requires a lot of sleep, 8 to 9 hours/day and more on weekends, but that is gradually decreasing. Practices and games have the biggest impact on her sleep as they are typically at night and she doesn’t get home until at or after her desired bed time (and then needs another hour to cooling down, snack and shower).</p>
<p>I don’t know of any students at her school currently taking more than 4 AP classes. I talked to parents of a very bright girl ('12) currently taking 4 and they said she is very busy but not overwhelmed. D has talked to other students that are taking or have taken each of the 6 AP classes that she registered for and believes that she can do it.</p>
<p>Unfortunately, D is not at all typical for school so it is hard to make comparisons based on other students. She has more than a whiff of ‘eau de Aspie’, has a near photographic memory and has standardized test scores well beyond anyone else at the school.</p>
<p>I think I just convinced myself to trust D’s judgment and let her go for it.</p>
<p>Thank you for the assistance. This was very helpful.</p>
<p>Bappy: I think it is always a good idea to trust your child. If she thinks she can handle it, and the GC thinks she can handle it - then go for it. It might be a good learning experience for her to figure out just how far she can push herself and what her limits (if any!) are. Some kids thrive on being busy and working hard. I had one of those hard workers and I also have one of the opposite - he has high test scores and makes straight As without much effort, but I just wonder what he could achieve if he ever put in any effort. He seems to skate through life with a wink and a smile! (H is convinced he’s going to be a conman!)</p>
<p>Hi All! Wondering if Kelowna is going to come back and finish her story…</p>
<p>Poor D has a crazy week; she is so “weary” as she told me earlier. The huge english/ap euro presentation is Wednesday, the honors portfolio Algebra II project is due tomorrow plus a big test on Wednesday. Plus the usual AP Euro workload. Add in the pressure of DI competition drawing near and she’s got no downtime. I think things will look better to her by Wednesday afternoon but I wish I could turn back time to when I could just tuck her under a blankie.</p>
<p>I know a few of you had mentioned starting college visits. I just scheduled her to go to two Saturday “preview days” at schools relatively close to home. One that she’s really not interested in and wouldn’t really be a good fit (Belmont) but I said that it’s a good one to get her feet wet without pressure; the other is one she thinks she might like (Sewanee.) If you have any schools close to home, the Saturday preview days are a good way to get the kiddos to start thinking about those vague concepts about colleges.</p>
<p>Sorry for being away for so long…
Before I finish the story, I need to remind myself what I have written so far ;).
So here it is
</p>
<p>Everything was arranged for my S to spend the night at his friend’s house. This is the kid whom I have seen before,he has been to our place, has eaten with us, I have seen his house (when picking up son), never met his parents. Apparently S and this friend were in two different groups before and after the dance. So when the after party fun was over, son’s date (who is 16 and already driving ) took S to this friend’s house - she is close friend with both, lives very close to this kid etc. They were both thinking they are going to have some more fun time talking and just being stupid (or whatever they do). When they pulled into the driveway the house was dark but the front door was open. Well, the party was apparently over. The kids were asleep either on the floor or on the sofas (I don’t know how many kids but it sounded like a small group, maybe 3-5), among many open and half empty bottles of beer. They woke up when my S and his date came in, but S said they sounded a little off, a little drank. I think he got afraid what is going to happen in the morning and wanted to leave the house. So him and his date have decided that she is going to give him a ride home, at 3 or so in the morning! And did I mention that we live 30 miles away, up in the mountains??? Many, many times have I told my S to always call me when he needs a ride. He obviously has ignored my advice. He thought that it would be nice to talk one on one with his friend while she was giving him the ride. Then she dropped him off and proceeded to go back, another 30 miles!
OK, so I am not sure about the driving laws for the young here, but from what S tells me, a young driver is not allowed to drive between the hours of 2 a.m. to 5 a.m. They both knew it and they both apparently ignored it!
After my close encounter with a heart attack, after I let my son into the house and realized what has happened I demanded that the girl comes back and sleeps here on the sofa, but she said she could not because…her parents had no idea where she was . And I bet they never found out!!!</p>
<p>That night/evening was a huge learning opportunity for me. Never in a million years have I anticipated the scenario that has actually happened - I am talking about being driven home by a friend. Alcohol I have thought about, as absolutely all the parents that are “not delusional” tell me that is is a fact of life that kids will get their hands on alcohol.
I had a talk with S the following day. He said that he was anticipating seeing alcohol at his friend’s house because during the eve. he has received a text from his friend asking him to chip in for beer. My S apparently replied that he is not giving any money because he is not really going to drink. I asked him whether he had some beer when he got to his friend’s house and he replied that he was thinking about it, but all the bottles, even the full ones, where already opened and he was afraid someone might have slipped “something” into them.
I have no way of knowing if he is telling the truth…</p>
<p>Kelowna: Thanks for the rest of the story. Just another example of that underdeveloped prefrontal lobe that the researchers keep telling us about. Even the best and brightest kids sometimes make poor decisions. At least it wasn’t a horrible one (having a couple of those beers and then driving home!). I can’t tell you how many times that I have looked at the decisions that my older D or older foster kids have made and just shook my head. I always ask, “And did that seem like a good idea at the time??”</p>
<p>This is the problem I have encountered with “just call me and I will give you a ride home” promise from parents…kids are worried that mom comes to party and sees all the drinking and either 1) intervenes (call other parents, etc) causing trouble and embarrassment or 2) condemns friends as deviants and prohibits kids from seeing friends again. OK…so you have to reassure kid that you will pick up–no questions asked, no interventions, no condemning of friends with one IMPORTANT caveat…parent seeing a kid in danger is obliged to intervene…if I see a kid who is a driver that is impaired I will step in; if I see a teenager passed out I will call the parent or even an ambulance; You expect your teen to do the same and generally this has worked when they are asked…how would you feel if your friend dies because you didn’t intervene? I realized when my son did something similar to Kelowna’s that it wasn’t stupidity but trying to protect peers from parental wrath…the constant reassurance each weekend that they can call without fear of parental wrath or meddling (always with the essential caveat) seems to have worked and I have had them call for pickup a couple of times. My daughter was at a party where a kid arrived with alchohol poisoning and vomited and passed out on the doorstep…ambulances were called, parents were called, lots of hidden booze was found…and they were 14!? Hard to believe but it happens</p>
<p>Arose to snow here - even my 9 yr old has had it with the snow.</p>
<p>Kel - Stories like yours are why I love CC parents thread - It let’s me know that my stupid teenager is quite normal and the high IQ does not prevent stupid teen moments. You should be proud that he choose a long drive over alcohol.</p>
<p>Rob - Let us know how the preview days go. My son is interested in Sewanee, but the dressing up for class may be a bit much. He says he has worn a uniform this long, so what is a few more years. But it would have to be really worth it.</p>
<p>My father-in-law has a preliminary course of action and 3 doctors appointments in the next week. He’ll be doing both surgery & chemo, but no decision as to the exact order yet. Meanwhile, my aunt is in the hospital for her second round of cancer. Done with chemo and moving onto stem-cell (they take her own to harvest and then put back?! - not clear on the entire process). Times like these I am glad to be in a region with many good hospitals within a short drive.</p>
<p>ADD coaching is starting to get to my kid. “Being this organized takes too much work. Is this how you waste so much of your time, Mom?” Well yes, times 8 for each family member, my parents & work -Duh, what the heck did you think that mega calendar was for?!</p>
<p>Kelowna: Thanks for finishing the story! My son went to his Winter Formal and a group of 18 had dinner at one of the girl’s house before the dance. After the dance I picked him up there. He had gone there after the dance with his date and 2 other girls. I asked him where everyone else went after the dance and he said they all went to a party at another girls house. I asked him why he didn’t go and he said because he was sure it was the kind of party I would not want him to go to. I was pretty impressed (and surprised).</p>
<p>Poor S came home from school today with a terrible cold. I knew it was bad when he was in bed by 7pm! Luckily, he’s got a few days lull in his normally busy schedule so if he has to stay home tomorrow - no big deal. Of course, his response to my suggestion to stay home tomorrow was met with a Noooooooooo, too much work to make up!</p>