Parents of the HS Class of 2014

Parents of Class of 20xx
1521

<p>@woody 35–You are so kind to help this young lady through this process. I am wondering if they will come to CC and do some of this work themselves. They need some skin in the game. Its easy to sit back and let someone else do all the work!! She has all summer to come here and learn the ins/outs of this site(and others like GET ME TO COLLEGE & COLLEGE BOARD… you won’t be able to do it all and it sounds like there are some issues that may become frustrating to you. Will she be willing to apply to schools that you recommend? Will she be an active partner when it comes to the app process next year? </p>

<p>Have a meeting with her and give her a few “assignments”… like to bring a copy of her transcript/recent report card, ask her to do some research on a school that she has interest in/take notes so you guys can discuss, maybe bring some of her writings/graded papers from this past year… If she arrives @ the meeting with these items/prepared, then you know she is interested in this process and open to your assistance.</p>

<p>Anecdotally, I have a friend whose dd15 is probably more prepared for college than most 2012ers… and she has been trying to help her neice(URM, first gen.,low income) prepare for the college process since the winter… this young lady is now a rising senior and has shown my friend that she really isn’t ready for this process, misses meetings, forgets to bring required items to the meetings when she does come, missed deadlines for summer app’s + programs in NYC that would be of benefit to a poor kid in her quest for a college degree, has done little studying for the SAT… and so forth. My friend has become very frustrated and is thinking of giving up on this girl… b/c she knows she can’t force her to do anything!!! Her parents are of little help as they have no idea what it really takes to get a student from point a to point b… so they make excuses/don’t hold her feet to the fire…again, no skin in the game…</p>

<p>I have no degrees, and I am URM/single parent yada yada yada… but I can tell you this, when dd14 was a freshman, I began to seek out information about scholarships which turned into a wonderful treasure trove of college admissions information(that I never knew existed)/summer programs/financial aid/ information etc etc etc! I knew so little and now, I am a procificient amateur!! :slight_smile: I am very invested in my daughters higher education and it gives me pride to know that I know alot more than her guidance counselor! Thank God for all you folks here @ CC… you guys are priceless…there is absolutely no excuse for ignorance these days… the interenet makes it all so easy!</p>

<p>As far as not taking AP classes… many kids at my daughters schools say the same thing and I wonder if they lack confidence, feel like they are not smart enough or don’t want to be in a classroom of smart kids who may not look like them… many kids find great comfort in being around those who look like them all the time…I’m sure it can be in a tough place to be in. One is already feeling like they don’t measure up to their peers, then to top it off, they have no one to find comfort in. My own dd14 was the only black student in her AP psych class(and in most of her classes for that matter) this year… but she was ok with it… because she was at the top of the class and feeds off of a good challenge! It might be a good idea to encourage her to take one! Even if she gets a “C”, it will force her out of that place of fear… it will boost her confidence! Its easy to sit on ones laurels and not challenge oneself… but there is no growth in that!</p>

<p>It sounds like your dd12 and this student are vastly different and the common app period will be a totally different ball game. </p>

<p>Is this student volunteering, working, what are her EC’s? What about her career interests? Have her do a brag sheet/resume so you can see what you are starting with.</p>

1522

<p>@woody 35</p>

<p>Here is the Common App 2012-2013 Preview which I stumbled upon last week… maybe you can print it out for her… have her fill it in and bring it to your first meeting… this will be another great “assigment” for you both to see where she stands. It will also be nice for her to do an essay… of course this is not the real thing… but I am sure it will be an eye opener for all 3 of you! Also, have her dad attend the meetings as well. Its imperative for him to know what this whole process entails…</p>

<p><a href=“https://www.commonapp.org/CommonApp/Docs/DownloadForms/2012/2012-13FY-FinalHighlightedPreview.pdf[/url]”>https://www.commonapp.org/CommonApp/Docs/DownloadForms/2012/2012-13FY-FinalHighlightedPreview.pdf&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>Books that I suggest… I read them all and learned alot.</p>

<p>Higher Ground… Preparing African American Children for College by Leah Latimer(the older edition from 1999 is better than the updated edition. It has a yellow cover)</p>

<p>The Acceptance(or Acceptance) by David Marcus</p>

<p>The Gatekeepers by Jaques Steinberg</p>

1523

<p>Classof2015 - a close friend’s D graduated from Wellesley, my own kid was accepted EA at Smith with a bunch of merit aid and WL at Bryn Mawr so I have no problem talking up womens’ colleges to any girl! </p>

<p>NewHavenCTmom - There’s no way her dad would visit CC. I don’t even think he uses the Internet much at all. I may have to give him a good shove to get him to visit her GC in person next school year. I’ve worked with him for several years & like him a lot but there are some good reasons why this girl may be the first one in her family to go to college. I just hate to see it not happen for her if she makes the effort toward it but has a support system whose main support consists of saying “get good grades and you can go to college” since we all know there’s a lot more planning, research, and outright work involved to make it really happen.</p>

<p>I’ve definitely considered whether to convince her to get on CC but I do have concerns she might get stuck in all those idiotic “chance me” threads or intimidated by the cancer-curing kids who claim 5.0 GPAs and she starts thinking she can’t compete for a college spot with those students. She may not be looking at the same type of colleges as those kids but I don’t want her to start thinking there’s not going to be some good college choices for her also! Not sure if the negative on CC would outweigh any positive for her but I figure I’ll give her the info about it anyway and let her decide if it’s the kind of site she thinks she could gain something from. I don’t want to make that decision for her and withhold the info about it since this is her college search and her life. I’ll just warn her about some of the negative aspects to a site like this. My own kid has never participated on CC but was very active in her own college research/application/visit/interview process. How she totally avoided CC is hard to imagine!</p>

<p>Yes, I’m very concerned I could end up like your friend!! I had already considered that I need to find out what kind of writer this girl is and ask if she has any personal writings or copies of graded essays I could read so I could see how that situation stands. I’m worried her dad will try to check out of the process as much as possible because he will think I can help her more than he can. He’s a parent who says to let the school handle anything related to education, doesn’t help with homework, etc. He can tell me she gets As/Bs and wants to be a doctor but i bet he couldn’t tell me what more than one of her course names was last year, a single teacher’s name, or who her GC was. Anything this girl has accomplished to this point with her grades is her working on her own without much parental input so she does have at least some self-motivation. Luckily, he has her in a great school district and makes sure she gets to school but not a lot more than that. </p>

<p>I’m making a big list of things we need to talk about and have her do this summer. Thanks for the input! In my house we had a long ramp-up for all this stuff since middle school so I need to remember some of the basic stuff to do that was just kind of taken for granted in our household or just fell into place along the way. My kid had particular requirements about the kind of degree programs and colleges she was interested in so I’m used to lots of college ideas being thrown out there and being outright rejected. Haha I don’t think I’ll take it personally because at least I already know there are many other possibilities still out there.</p>

1524

<p>Dave_N: We have not yet toured colleges with our 2014er so I don’t know typically how long one visit takes but I can share the distance between the two campuses you mentioned is not far at all…maybe 15-20 minute drive if traffic is not an issue. One is in St. Paul but on the Mpls side of St. Paul and the other is in Mpls on the St. Paul side of Mpls. :slight_smile: It seems like one should be able to stop by one in the morning and the other in the afternoon without much trouble.</p>

1525

<p>Dave_N,</p>

<p>We did a college tour in April in the NJ/PA area. We hit 2 schools in one day. It can be done. Have you contacted the admissions office to let them know that you are coming? Some schools like you to sign up, some don’t.</p>

1526

<p>FWIW, college visits seem to be about an hour in info sessions and then a 90 minute walking tour with a student guide.</p>

1527

<p>Dave_N</p>

<p>As indicated by other posts it is possible if the two schools are close together. We had a couple of successes and a couple of misses two years ago with S-11. This summer we will do two visits in one day with D-14. We will visit Davidson and Wake Forest or Wake and Elon in one day as the schools all have morning and afternoon sessions and are reasonably close together. Two years ago we did WF and Duke but we had to push the drive in between.</p>

<p>Just remember that you should allow 2.5 hours for your info session and tour but then you need to add time for getting to the car, stopping at the union or bookstore, and traffic time in and out of town. Good luck.</p>

1528

<p>Well, we’ve had bit of change anyway. </p>

<p>It seems that University of Minnesota - Twin Cities doesn’t do any visits on Wednesday in the summer (except self-guided), so we’re going to make a quick change of plans. We now intend to do University of Wisconsin Madison on a Tuesday and Macalester on Wednesday. We still might wander around Minnesota depending upon our stamina and the weather. </p>

<p>We’re just doing information sessions and tours at both stops. DS signed up for an interview at Macalester, but they called back and said that don’t do interviews for rising juniors. Frankly, son was a bit relieved. “I won’t have to dress up on vacation after all.” </p>

<p>At this point, it’s all low key and good fun, so we’ll just roll with it.</p>

<p>Thanks for all the input!</p>

1529

<p>Dave N-We’re also going to visit Macalester in July. Do you know they have a bed and breakfast right on campus in the Alumni House? Rates are very inexpensive and we’re hoping it will be a lovely introduction to the campus. We are doing a morning tour at Macalester and then driving over to Carleton. While they are both liberal arts schools, it will be interesting to compare large city/small town differences.</p>

1530

<p>Bought S his APUSH summer required reading book. It Unbroken which is supposed to be great. His reply? “Mom it’s so big! Like 403 pages!!” sigh.</p>

1531

<p>Dave_N: Your son probably doesn’t need to worry about getting dressed up for college visits or interviews. In all of our visits to schools with ds12 we saw one applicant dressed up and he looked really out of place. Now, you probably don’t want to have him wear a tee shirt covered with profanity, but clean jeans or shorts and a neutral tee shirt or polo are fine at most schools. It’s very different from what I remember when I visited colleges!</p>

1532

<p>89wahoo: Unbroken is an outstanding read. Perfect for an APUSH class. Every year, there is an essay question, it seems, about climate and culture during a particular decade. Unbroken really gives a reader a feel for the 1930s and 1940s. A few years ago, there was a question about the 1960s. One of my former students said she wrote a ton on music, as in protest songs. She got a 5 on the exam.</p>

<p>I may suggest Unbroken to my son as a possible choice. He needs to read three books for projects – one during the summer. Besides, there is just enough sports stuff at the start to interest him.</p>

<p>As for dressing up with a college visit, unless there is an interview planned, keep it relatively casual. My son has worn a polo shirt and shorts (or khakis, depending on the temps) when he visited two schools. The same dress code will be in place when he sees a few more schools this summer.</p>

1533

<p>Mom reads if S won’t start that book I’m going to!</p>

1534

<p>Thanks @ Momreads for the heads up about how kids dress on campus -
"As for dressing up with a college visit, unless there is an interview planned, keep it relatively casual. My son has worn a polo shirt and shorts (or khakis, depending on the temps) when he visited two schools. The same dress code will be in place when he sees a few more schools this summer. "</p>

<p>If there was an interview planned, would you take it up a notch to the sportcoat and tie level?</p>

<p>Husband and I dropped of S to his summer camp: CTY. It went much more smoothly than years past, and it was great to see how happy the kids were to see each other. Back to a quiet house for us.
Smiles,
Parent Sparkle</p>

1535

<p>I think a sport coat/tie is nice for the “occasion”, it shows that the student wanted to look their best. Is that old fashioned? Probably… but when dd14 has the good fortune of grabbing a interview, I will have wear her nicest glad rags…</p>

1536

<p>I wouldn’t go out and buy a sport coat for the occasion if he doesn’t own one though. I think a shirt and tie is “sufficient” if that’s what he has.</p>

1537

<p>I think a lot of what to wear on an interview depends on the school and location. I will tell you for sure that if your kid shows up in a tie for an interview at a school in the northwest, your kid will probably feel pretty uncomfortable. At schools we visited and where ds interviewed (Lafayette, Lehigh, Middlebury, Whitman, Colorado College, Gonzaga, UVM, Lewis and Clark, Santa Clara, Puget Sound and even Stanford) no one was dressy. This may very well be different at ivies or in the south or midwest, but this is what we saw repeatedly. Yes, being dressy may make you stand out, but for teenagers, looking different from everyone around them can make them uncomfortable and awkward. If they are doing scholarship or special interviews, that is a great time to go dressier. </p>

<p>Just make sure that your kid feels comfortable with what they are wearing. I forced my ds to wear a polo shirt on our first visits and quickly realized that it was not a battle that mattered as the rest of the kids were even more casual than he was!</p>

1538

<p>Hi, I am the mom of a S12 and D14. S12 will be starting at Penn in the fall. I’m trying to get started a little early for D14, who is an excellent student and interested in engineering and in Penn also. Penn is the only school she has much experience with. She’s already taken the SATs (2100) and SAT II Math (800). We’re in Phila area and she wants to stay within at least a somewhat drivable area, could go as far as South Carolina or Boston. I’d like to have her visit a few kinds of schools so she makes an informed decision, but not really sure where to start on that. Can you get a good feel for schools in the summer? Or should we wait for the fall for visits.</p>

1539

<p>Penn, I don’t know when your D starts school but our high school kids go back after Labor Day which gave me two good weeks to take D13 to colleges last summer with the kids in class but without having her miss any school.</p>

1540

<p>PennMom2012 - Welcome to the Class of 2014 thread.
Summer is fine for having the first look on many campuses. Obviously, you won’t see the campus at regular speed as you would during the school year but you can at least get a flavor of the programs and campus by going to the Admissions information session and the student tour that typically follows. When you get down to a few schools you can make return visits during the school year. As I am sure you are aware having just been through this process, the admitted student visit days in the spring of senior year provide a great way to see the school in full swing. Also check out the overnight student visits that are often offered in the January to March time frame.</p>