@endesmom Boulder & UofO are about the same price. Both are the most expensive schools on DS’s list since we are instate for the UC’s. Because of that a cheeper school would probably win out. I don’t expect he’s likely to get $$ any of these places, so we will just have to see what happens. Since we visited last week, I’m really hoping he gets into UCSC and that is his top choice. Except for no marching band, I really think it’s perfect fit in many many ways.
I’m starting to feel bad because S17 only applied to 5 schools and only 1 is maybe a high-match, no real reaches. He’s been offered acceptance and significant merit at 3 already. He definitely is not a kid who would thrive in a super competitive environment and he didn’t want to be far from home or in an urban environment. Then it seemed a lot of the schools were extremely similar and he didn’t want to do numerous apps for “the same thing”. I know the 5 apps are probably enough for him and it will give him options but maybe he’s selling himself short.
Sigh. My D had a total meltdown yesterday during our weekly meeting. I was getting a lot of attitude and when I questioned her about what that was all about, the tears and hysterics started. Apparently I am stressing her out, no one else’s parents are micromanaging this process the way I am, she’s 18, she can handle it, etc. I halted the meeting at that point, before I lost my temper. I’m feeling really unappreciated, but also feeling bad that my involvement seems to be increasing her stress instead of helping to ease it. At this point I don’t know what’s going to happen–I’m seriously doubting she’ll make any November 1 deadlines, but perhaps I am underestimating her. I’m going to back off and we’ll see where the chips fall. She’ll end up going to college somewhere. Or if not, she can take a gap year. If things don’t go according to her plan, perhaps she’ll be more amenable to some guidance/assistance next time around.
I think I’m going to try to take a bit of a break from the forum–while I love the support and camaraderie here, I can’t help that’s it’s feeding my anxiety and obsession with this whole process, and perhaps I’m telegraphing that to D.
@klinska I can relate, my D told me to stop asking her about homework, college apps, SAT studying, etc. She said she knows what she needs to do and will do it when she’s ready. @motherofdragons had given some great advice about limiting the college chats to once per week. I went from daily asking to going on day 3 of keeping my mouth shut and it’s tough! She did inform me of her own volition last night that her last EA app would have to be moved to RD, which I just quietly said, ok! Quite frankly is just fine. It is a lot of stress for these kids and doesn’t help them that we feel it too or even more! I’ve taken to staying on cc to divert my attention and respond to kids asking for help now. It’s keeping me a bit calmer lol.
Oh and @eandesmom congrats on those 3 apps!
@klinska Ugh, I’m so sorry. I have gotten much of that same feedback–again, are you SURE we don’t have the same kid? I will miss you here and hope you are back soon.
She hit submit on the St Michael’s app last night, so all done with the Nov 1 apps. She’s got 3 for Nov 15, so hopefully she will get started on the supplemental questions for those soon, so it’s not a rush at the end.
@eandesmom, great news on the completed apps! If you don’t mind a thought to consider on interviews; If they are optional, (try to find out from someone who is knowledgeable about the particular school), could a less than enthusiastic telephone interview actually be detrimental?
UGH! I made the mistake of reading a post last night from a kid who was rejected from what should have been really almost a safety and not a school known for yield protection. General feeling based on what the kid posted is that it very likely is due to political views (unclear if they were in the essay or not) and the EC’s etc related to that.
S17’s essay, and EC’s are far from neutral on this subject though admittedly quite different than the rejected student. He had taken a different approach with the original essay but encouraged by the AP Lit teacher, went where he felt he needed to. Which, some will not like I am sure. Or shake their heads at the youthful naivete or who knows. He had shied away originally for this exact fear and was encouraged to go there by the teacher. His chosen schools should be relatively open to the positions and passion expressed, the list was crafted with this in mind. And, in reality if they don’t like it they are not the place for him. I do believe that and support it. But still, it made for a bad nights sleep for me.
It was helped by waking up to a fee waiver from a school actually on his list. Sent directly from the AO he interviewed with (versus a mass email code). And I know they discussed some of these subjects in the interview. I think I am breathing again.
@klinska I think your D is being perfectly normal! All the kids seem to be hormonal stressed out messes, mine included. Loving amazing engaged child one second, surly snarling bear the second. I too am making him do things that NOBODY else is doing (until then I hear about one friend whose parents made him revise his essay 3 times in one weekend or one friend who xxx or, so on so on so on). If it makes you feel better he went off the handle for my giving him a “guilt trip” about sending an email thank you to someone and how ridiculous that was.
Sigh.
Personally it helps me to know that most kids are super stressed out and it’s not just mine. I worked the concession stand at the last football game on Friday. 5 parents, 5 very different kids. Every single one of them stressed and taking it out on their parents with the “I got this” attitude and then being needy the next second. I can’t tell where the line is or the eggshells so tread as carefully as I can and hope the dust does settle. I am biting my tongue on homework and grades, it’s about all I can do.
@smakl70 I think it sounds like a nice list and clearly well thought out if he has 3 acceptances with merit already.
@ECmotherx2 I do agree, a lackluster phone interview could do more harm than good. My actually request for my S is to simply reach out to the AO and see if they plan any visits out here as he will be unable to visit live. My concern is that this school rates interviews as very important, though they are stated as optional. S did meet with them at a college fair but I am skeptical that the data was actually tracked as he was also told at that fair that he should get info on a fly in opportunity if he checked his interest on the fair postcard and he’s not recieved a thing.
@eandesmom I think they are talking about that post on the main 2017 thread and the consensus seems to be that it’s a fake post, so don’t worry too much. 
^ I am overly involved (obsessed) in getting S17 into college. I have done the majority of the research, which was based on criteria given by Son/Hubby/I. Son/Hubby will attend the info sessions/tours (12 total), but rarely look at brochures or websites. S17 wrote 2 essays & said he does not want to apply to any of the U’s on the list where he cannot use either (or a modified version) for the prompt given. So it appears that 1 U will come off the list & no scholarship app will be submitted at another. Hubby/Son are convinced he will be accepted into his #1 choice (an in-state U), but I am not so sure. It is a smaller regional U, but admission has become very competitive since it is now a safety school for all the high GPA/test score students who are afraid of rejection from UVA or VA Tech.
S17 filled out all sections on the C/A activities page, but he was grasping at straws. As someone else mentioned, if he had been able to group them he would have listed 5 or 6.
S17 has 2 reaches on his list & 3 safeties (based on GPA/test scores). For the remaining, he is within the 50% range on test scores, but not GPA. He has been accepted into one of his safeties, but he is not eager to attend.
Busy (bittersweet) weekend … Friday was senior night at the last home football game / half-time show. Saturday was the last marching band competition of the season. Tonight the band marches in a Halloween parade & then that is it for marching band – which we all love. Next month is jazz band auditions, but it is just not the same camaraderie (kids/parents) as marching band.
Apps … S17 has applied to 5 U’s; the rest have 12/1 deadlines. We are waiting for his mid-November report card to see if it lists his new GPA & class rank. He usually has a slow start grade-wise 1st quarter, but this year he is doing extremely well; especially since he is taking 3 AP classes (Lit, Gov & Music Theory).
Portals … The 3 non C/A U’s have provided portals, but the 2 C/A U’s did not provide portals. Has anyone else experienced this or is it just a coincidence? Also the FAFSA is not showing up as received/submitted on any portal – anyone else see/don’t see FAFSA info? We do not qualify for need-based $ but some of the U’s want the FAFSA for merit-based $.
Happy Halloween! Good luck to all w/November 1st deadlines!
Happy Monday!
@julesegr and any others considering Colorado College, we learned with my 2013 HS grad that they are VERY need aware. My son was not accepted and, since it was tied for #1 on his list, he took it very hard. He followed up with the admissions rep and was told his EC/GPA/SAT has solid, but they have to make financial decisions. (I forget his WGPA, his ACT was 34 and ECs were in depth and got him top scholarships at Pitzer, Rhodes and Trintiy U)
We would have needed at least 50% in merit/aid to make it in-line with other schools he had applied to.
Colorado College is very up-front about this. If you can afford full pay, tell them up-front. If you cannot and you are not URM, consider it a high reach.
@klinska Hugs. I’m with you back off. I play this game with stress & anxiety with my S17. I’m sure she will get some apps in. There really is tons of time. These boards can be totally stressful, particularly watching all the top kids who have tons of applications in by now. And at some point in the game you really do have to let this be their responsibility.
The tough part of this for me is ballencing how hard to push/not push. The deadline stress really does help S17 get things done as long as it’s not too extreme. Something about having it due tomorrow can make an essay materialize out of thin air. (He’s been thinking about it… it just doesn’t get on paper.) I know this and it’s why nagging my son to turn in apps well before deadline would just be counterproductive. And why I refused to travel for Thanksgiving. (I KNOW those Cal State/UC apps won’t get done till then) The trick is it’s will really help all over stress if they get in at least one EA app to a school they have a good chance at, because that one early acceptance could really help all over college app stress.
I was about to post how S17 still hasn’t finished the OSU (Oregon) EA 11/1 deadline we had talked about. I wasn’t going to nag him last night as he was clearly doing homework till late. It’s been a crazy buy weekend, he wants to go out a bit for Halloween tonight. He’ll be on a field trip tomorrow & gone till 10pm. I’m going to assume that if he doesn’t do it tonight it’s just not going to get done EA.
@kt1969 it may be a fake post (and really, who has time for that, the fact that people do things like that boggle the mind) but it still brought up some fears that will be there until acceptances come in. I wouldn’t/can’t change a thing mind you (not that I had a choice anyway lol) but it’s going to be a concern…until it’s not. The fee waiver and personal note to S about his fit did help ease my mind.
@MomStudent2017 I feel your pain on band seasons ending. Although our jazz group is closer than the MB group, but our jazz is all year long. We have no provided portals yet (no clue how long that typically takes) but S did open one up at a school that allows it pre-application (encourages it and it was a way to show interest). That one only shows one test score having arrived (as opposed to 2). I contacted them and they have both. However it doesn’t show the transcript yet either and that went out on 10/20 so I guess I’ll need to contact them about that as well. FAFSA and PROFILE do not show in their portal but based on the way they word what they “need” I don’t think it will. It doesn’t show as missing, it just isn’t referenced at all.
My kids each applied to exactly one school. The one who fits exactly into this category applied to one with auto admit and she was well within the stats needed. She applied in Sept and was accepted in October and done. The daughter is a much better student but found a school she likes I did.n’t see this as not reaching but as picking a school she’d be happy attending, comfortable among academic peers. Why be uncomfortable for 4 years? Why always feel like everyone else is light years ahead of you and you have to always be running just to keep up? There are other ways to feel the ‘reach’ of college- going to a different climate, living in a different type of housing, taking a course that is a stretch. My daughter who is the better student was petrified she wasn’t good enough when she started college even though her stats put her in the top part of the accepted class. Her first semester was tense, but once she found she could keep up (and even be in the front once in a while) she was happier. If she was at a school like MIT or Hopkins, I don’t think she would have made it only because of the pressure and I know college wouldn’t have been as enjoyable for her.
A friend of hers was at the top of their class and applied to one school, FSU. Her mother and father went to FSU, her brother went to FSU, she was going to FSU. In fact, she graduated from high school and started college a few weeks. She couldn’t wait to get to FSU. It was not a reach for her. She’s happy.
@MomStudent2017 - It never even dawned on me to have DS check portals for the FASFA received/submitted info. He did get an e-mail from one of his admitted schools asking if he was going to, had, or wasn’t going to submit FASFA and he actually replied to it. Add that to the list of things I’ll be nagging him to check.
@twoinanddone - thanks for the thoughts. They are all good fits to varying degrees and I’m fairly certain he could do well/be happy at any of them. His older brother tried a more prestigious school and the pressure wasn’t good for him at all. He’s been much happier since he transferred.
Suprisingly, over the weekend he logged into Facebook to show me an accepted student page he had joined and everyone’s posts. I was shocked that 1) he had joined the group and 2) he had actually posted to it. Maybe he will start doing things on his own!
@MomStudent2017 I’m there with you about Marching Band. This weekend was a big event, tomorrow the band goes on a field trip. Friday they play at an away game as a pep bed, and next Saturday is the last competition. Seems to have gone by in a flash. Add to the fact I’ve been working and have barely volunteered this year and it feels almost like it never happened. I know S17 is sad, although it feels a bit anti-climatic since last year we went to more competitions & the season felt longer.
Haven’t even checked the main board today, so don’t know what all the fuss is about. I should be working… I’m totally stressed between my job, the college apps, and this election. I just can’t wait for this month to be over.
@Longhaul that makes me sad about CC. We need lots of aid. I actually think that academically Cornell College in IA might be a better fit for my D. Same block structure but just a little more opportunity for pre-professional curriculum. I ruled them out initially because the NPC came back out of our reach. I just ran it again thinking maybe we might find a way (since I couldn’t remember how far off it was initially)
Here is the thing - on the Cornell College NPC they have $12,535 estimated for Books and Supplies!!! Plus another $4,739 for travel expenses (it is only a 4 hr drive from us). Does that seem excessive to anyone else?
If I could reduce that by 2/3 then the school might actually be with in reach for us. Thoughts?
The $12k for books has to be wrong (maybe it was supposed to be $1,253.50?) As for the travel, it’s a 4 hour drive for you, but what about the kid who has to fly from upstate NY, or rural Texas? It might be a $800 per trip, starting in Syracuse and flying to NYC or Detroit, transferring to Chicago, and then somehow getting to middle-of-nowhere Iowa…
My daughter goes to Wyoming which is an easy 2 hour drive from Denver. Kids who live in rural Wyoming (and let’s face it, it is all rural Wyoming), it might be a 9 hour drive one way. Many kids take cars and trucks to college and park them in outlying lots, using them only to go home at the end of the semester just because that is cheaper than having a parent drive them, stay over, drive home, and then repeat it every time they need to go home.
@twoinanddone it is very clearly $12K It breaks out $48K in direct costs (tuition +RB) plus the additional indirect costs (supplies and travel) to total $66K total estimated costs. I wish I could attach a screencap here.
It seems really excessive to me too…but I know they and Colorado College both tout the benefit of being able to take block courses anytime/anywhere. So maybe they include those travel expenses in that number?
I think the whole thing is a mistake though. On College 411, the total COA for Cornell College is only $53700, which is ~$48k in tuition, room and board, (as you listed) and then another $5000 or so for the travel, books, etc. The $66k total has the extra $12k for ‘books’ in it. If that’s totally wrong, the actual price is $53k, not $66k.
MONEY MATTERS
Cost of Attendance $53,728
Tuition and Fees
$39,900
Room and Board
$8,900
Average Percent of Need Met 80%
Average Freshman Award $30,155
Average Indebtedness of
2015 Graduates $30,790
You could buy books bound in gold for $12000.
@twoinanddone If that is the case Cornell College is less than ** CU Boulder for out of state **. Lets see…
They list:
OOS Tuition and Fees: $35,079
On-campus Room and Board2 $13,590
Books/Supplies $ 1,800
On-campus Estimated Total Per Year $50,469
More for room & board. Slightly less tuition. No travel included in the cost.
$4,739 Seems a bit high for travel costs. But IDK what does it cost to get from the airport TO Colorado College? A shuttle probably costs money. I sent my DD to the other coast for 4 years. It didn’t cost us that much even during her first two years when I brought her home both T-giving & Spring break.
Can’t get S17 to look at Colorodo College. He doesn’t like the idea of the block schedule. I think it might be good for him but he has a point, that if you hate the one class you are in it can be really difficult.