@bgbg4us Our response is similar to the one @SoccaMomma posted. I will not be my kids’ motivator. They have to take ownership of own the natural consequences of their decisions. We have kids who were tippy top competitive kids and kids who are totally laid back and just go along. Our competitive kids took full charge of planning things out and checking off all of the boxes. Our unmotivated kids, well, they have very limited options. My current Jr has yet to plan on a testing date and has not sat for a single test. Her plan is to live at home and attend the local 4 yr U, but if she doesn’t get more motivated, she may just end up at the CC.
Honestly, not my problem. I am not going to prod them on campus to get involved and be a go-getter there, either. Kids who go far do so bc of internal motivation. If my kids don’t have enough motivation to think about college, then they are self-limiting themselves. It is a an indicator of what they are likely to do on-campus, too. Going to class and just plugging along will land you pretty much the same place anywhere—pretty avg career.
Why stress about their future and goals if they won’t put in the same amt of energy for the same? Pushing and prodding will only get them so far, and if you stop the forward exertion, the physics of the situation has them landing on their caboose.
Our DD17 is attending CC, and is beautifully plugging along at her classes a couple at a time. She gets overwhelmed easily, and has learned that she also does better when the course load is M-W-F. She works 5 dinner shifts a week, too! So different from DD19 who would take 6 classes and immerse herself in community service if sleep and homework were not a thing!
@SoccaMomma
We got an identical letter from Roanoke College. @bgbg4us
I would ask your DS about which colleges he is interested in going, then schedule a college tour or two (if you have not already done so) during the weekend/break, my DS’ was motivated by college tours (when he saw the colleges in person and liked them and then saw the test scores they were “expecting”). Just my two cents, worked for us.
Also, for standardized testing, the prepping is crucial for most kids. I will at least get the official ACT books (we did SAT but I assume there are official ACT practice tests out there) and have him practice over them.
Checking in after a long time - great info as usual.
A question on EFC calculation criteria: for 2020 admission cycle (with apps for admission during Oct-Dec 2019 timeframe) - is 2018 tax return the main basis? or 2019? Do we actually need tax returns to show income? (the question is relevant for us as we had significantly higher income in 2018 but because of nature of my job and my spouse job loss - it will be much lower in 2019). Based on 2019 income - our efc maybe low enough to get some aid at colleges that fully meet the need. But our 2019 returns will not be ready until Jan/Feb 2020 - by when decisions maybe already done? I am just confused about the timelines for FA apps - especially if we apply in EA cycle.
TIA.
For Fin Aid, the income considered is from’prior-prior’ year, which means for HS class of 2020, the tax returns from 2018 year will be used to calculate your EFC. If you had an unusual year (big bonus, severance etc.) you should communicate to the FA office and get their input. For job loss, they expect you to find a similar paying job sooner than later, so I don’t believe EFC changes as much, but it is college dependent.
I posted on this forum quite a while ago but wanted to check in again. My ds is about to pick senior classes. Time flies and things seem to be moving a little too fast! I spoke with a college counselor today for a one-time consult. She says that everyone in senior year should take the following courses: english, math, a science, a foreign language and a history. My question is - why history especially if one is going into stem? My ds has completed 3 years of history including AP US History. He wants to take AP Computer science next year instead. Has anyone else heard of this?
@Octagon, that’s what I heard, too, with some caveats - most colleges want to see four years of science, math, English, and social sciences. Social sciences doesn’t have to be history. At my daughter’s school it is World History for freshmen, then European Hisrory, US History, and then Economics and Government senior year, with the last three available as AP versions. Foreign Language - especially elite colleges want to see all kids to complete 4th level of FR, not necessarily four years. So for a kid who takes a AP Spanish junior year, for example, there is no expectation to take Spanish Lit senior year.
I feel your pain. My non-stem kid has taken three years of regular sciences and would love to be done and take AP Psychology, for example, but would be doing AP Bio instead.
@typiCAmom, thanks for the feedback. So much for exploration! My ds does well in history and was strongly encouraged to take AP gov senior year by his current AP US History teacher so it may not be so bad. But he wanted to truly explore CS to see if that might become a major. I will have to break it to him gently…
D20 is thinking the same. She’ll be taking 4 AP’s next year and wants to do honors Spanish 4 instead of a 5th AP. D18 took the 5 AP’s and sucked it up with Spanish. It did help her test out of a language her freshman year (even though both want to travel abroad neither have enjoyed languages!)
My d20 also has decided not to do a 4th year of FL. She is loading herself down with 6 AP courses and she is not having it when I suggest that might be too much. (AP Lit, AP Physics, AP Calculus, AP Research, AP CS, AP Econ/Gov.) It is going to be a very long, hard year
Wow. D18 did AP Lit, AP Physics, AP Calculus, AP US History and AP Spanish hercsenior year. She had to take Theology too and took Psychology as an elective. Varsity sports year round made things very busy… then adding on national merit application, presidential scholar application, on top of college apps, extra scholarships… ugh she was very burned out. Her good friend who is at Harvard this year took the 6th AP and lived through it though… on very little sleep, but made it! These kids are so much tougher in many ways than we ever were at their age I think—it’s a different world!
D17 took 5 APs junior year ( AP Physics 1, AP Eng Lang, AP Chem, AP Calc BC and APUSH) and 6 AP senior year ( AP Physics C, AP Eng Lit, AP Euro, AP Stats, AP Comp Sc A, AP Spanish). It wasn’t that bad, she spent a lot of time watching Netflix. She works a lot harder now in college than HS.
Good lord. Those are a lot of AP courses. It sounds socially horrid. My D20 is taking it fairly easy her senior year so she can enjoy friends and not stress during college app season. The dual-sport thing does get in the way of homework at times, but I’m hoping she won’t have much homework in metal sculpture. :). But, then, she is look at Top 130 schools, not Top 20.
I totally agree @bigmacbeth - it does sound socially horrid and I’m sure it will be. I’m contemplating emailing the counselor to see what she thinks. D20 won’t be talked out of it by me but maybe could be persuaded by the counselor.
@Octagon, I for one would enter a vote for AP Comp Sci, since that is a class your S20 WANTS to take. You don’t need 4 years of history at 98% of colleges. If you’re S20 is gunning for those 2%, then go with History.
@bigmacbeth, Thanks it does seem wrong to stop him from pursuing a real interest! It reminds me that "“You can please some of the people all of the time, you can please all of the people some of the time, but you can’t please all of the people all of the time - John Lythgate.
My eldest dropped history for AP Comp Science (and only did 3 years of a language) and still got into a top 2% school. Take what you love, not just a string of APs that are exactly the same as everyone else.
I think I might be in the minority here but I believe a government class (not necessarily AP, regular is fine, too) should be required for anyone who plans to live in USA as an adult. Now, whether this class should be taken in HS or in college is just semantics, but at some point kids need to learn what our government actually does. AP Euro - yes, I can see a STEM kid skipping it, though I probably will force my techie son to take it as well when the time comes, not for colleges sake, but because it is truly a part of general education. CS can be taken as DE or self-taught if someone is truly passionate about it, but it’s a lot harder to self-study a subject you are not particularly interested in (I.e. history for a STEM kid).
It is hard when classes don’t schedule well together and choices have to be made. Our school requires Government so many seniors will take a 2 semester AP Government class. My family rule (for my STEM loving kids) is 4 years of math, English, science, social studies and a language. The rest is up to them.
