Parents of the HS Class of 2021 (Part 3)

I’m sorry about your D’s break-up, @TVBingeWatcher2 ! I remember when they started going out . . . Hugs to her. I remember being shocked after my first break up that it actually physically hurt—as if my heart really was broken.

I’m dreading this with my D21 and her boyfriend. They are such good friends, and our families have even gotten to know each other. They decided when they started dating that they would break up when she left for college (he still has a year of high school). She’s been very matter-of-fact about it, but I know the emotions are coming.

1 Like

Bed Bath and Beyond Frustrating - placed our order a month or so ago and all confirmed for pick up. Showed up at the store today and they told us they didn’t have 4 out of the 9 items in our order.

Would have been nice to have been given advanced notice, so we could order elsewhere. They sent several emails indicating our order was ready over the past week and the list was complete.

Felt horrible for the store manager, as he said he had been breaking the bad news to families all week and it is corporate wide issue !

Just placed an order on Amazon for delivery to her dorm - all
good….but was trying to break our reliance on Amazon!

Hope all you BB&B shoppers have better luck.

1 Like

As we were moving my daughter into her dorm she got another email from St. Louis University letting her know there was still time to enroll as classes don’t start until August 25. Even though she informed them she was not coming back in March they have continued to send letters, emails, flyers etc. about becoming a Billiken…

2 Likes

S20 continues to receive email (and snail mail) from over a half dozen colleges that accepted him 16 months ago, reminding him he can “easily”, “seamlessly”, “automatically”, “effortlessly” transfer/enroll. Even a handful of schools that didn’t officially accept him in 2020 are offering easy transfer.

S20 feels flattered to be wanted, though he’s happy where he is and has no desire to transfer. To me, it kind of feels like the curtain is being pulled back on the wizard. After all the work of chasing them for so long, it now feels like we could have “demanded/requested more” equity in the courtship process all along.

3 Likes

On another forum, students are still hoping to get off the waiting list at Johns Hopkins for this fall. They believe the list is still active because they haven’t been told otherwise.

Well, in the ongoing saga of my daughter’s journey to college, she won’t be starting school on Tuesday at all- she tested positive for Covid this morning. Luckily she’s apparently asymptomatic, but we all got tested when my husband tested positive. She’s fully vaccinated, we continued to mask indoors, and we’ve not eaten out/gone to concerts/etc still. This kid cannot get a break.

3 Likes

I sure hope they enrolled elsewhere while they wait!

1 Like

Well, you never know since UVA unenrolled 238 students who didn’t turn in vax info or didn’t get vaccinated and I think 30-40 of them had registered for classes?

3 Likes

https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.cnn.com/cnn/2021/08/20/us/uva-disenrolling-students-vaccine/index.html

7 Likes

Parents with move-in experiences, any downside to moving in at 2pm vs 8am/earlier other than roommate will get first dibs of room? S21 got home late from works so only had the back half of the day move in window. Any tips would be greatly appreciated!!

The downsides to later move-in:

  1. Hotter
  2. People more tired/less patient
  3. If there were earlier general move-in problems, could be a cascading delay/effect that hits later move-ins harder
  4. Lots more people as many don’t want to get up earlier to move in/can create parking jams/traffic jams/people lingering from earlier move in times
  5. Fewer resources available (as more people are already on campus creating longer wait times) especially if move-in drags on
  6. Navigating the room with half the space already moved-in/taken up with stuff

Tips for move-in

  1. Bring patience, Advil and bandaids. Sense of humor good if available.
  2. Make sure you have water/drinks available. Hydrating is key.
  3. Tool-kits/boxes are your friend, if anything needs to be built (that you are bringing) or if you are planning on lofting a bed, etc - BRING NECESSARY TOOLS!
  4. Assume local stores may well be sold out of stuff, especially if your child’s college is rural/small town/out of the way. Supply chain issues are real, bring as much as is reasonable to how you are traveling before you hit town.
  5. Check and re-check room dimensions before you get there. If you aren’t spatially aware, tape that area out at home, cut it in half and place all you are bringing with you so you will have some understanding of how much space will be taken just bringing your child’s stuff into the room (before you start building/puttng away/etc). Don’t forget to put yourself and your child into that space - you’ll be there in the room, just like the bags and boxes. And remember that there will be the furniture in the room to navigate around in that space as well.
  6. If possible, find out if roommate has already completely moved in and if parents/family are gone before your assigned time. Let them know you are on your way (again if possible), they might be able to clear out to give more space, help move stuff in, or have tips about parking, delays or insider knowledge.
  7. Take a deep breath (or 10) if problems occur. Allow your child to take a shot at handling any issues that arise, but also be willing to (politely) escalate if problems aren’t being handled.
  8. Facilities employees/staff are invaluable - treat them with respect.
8 Likes

Good luck with her move-in. Barnard (like all colleges) have their procedures proofed over many years. I believe they went as far as partially closing the subway station for much of the day, to avoid people coming up the stairs THAT side of Broadway when the sidewalk is already full with parents and students.

Are you planning to rent a car to do your shopping in the ‘burbs, or are you planning to do your shopping trips in cabs?

If you’re staging everything at your hotel, then you could just do a few trips during the remainder of the day and wouldn’t be limited to whatever time slot.

In prior years you would arrive a few minutes early and pull up/double-park along Broadway. You’d look for an empty square painted on the sidewalk. While your daughter disappears to get in line for registration and get her ID and room key, the parents unload the car onto the square. One parent babysits the goods, while the other goes around the block to a parking garage (figure out where those are ahead of time) - one is right on Claremont.

It might work out that daughter comes back by the time driver walks back from parking garage.

Next step is for daughter to potentially take a bag and try to be first in the room to have first claim on the preferred bed :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye: and put her bag on THAT.

In the meantime one parent tries to secure a rolling moving-“bin” and the parents start loading that up. When daughter returns from mad dash to room and back, she and a helper will push the bin to the room where she can unload.

Dorms are small and there really isn’t much another adult can do since furniture, desk, chairs are already standing and the kids will want to organize their own space anyway.

After max two trips all will be in the room. If you can’t fit it in two moving bins, you can’t fit it in her dorm!

At this point ask your daughter what she prefers: maybe give her until afternoon to explore/socialize/unpack a bit — it’s not a race. They’ll have plenty of downtime during orientation to get their space set up.

Maybe by the afternoon she is up for an early dinner, or might have realized what else she might need, or what might not fit and can be returned, requiring one final shopping excursion.

Parents could return to Hotel, attend whatever program that Barnard might be hosting, or walk to Riverside Park, Grant’s Tomb, etc. and wait for a txt.

3 Likes

Thanks for this! Hopefully the hallway will be cleared out. S21’s room is between the elevator and stairs so we don’t have to trek down the entire hall. We aren’t bringing anything extras since he has plenty of furniture in the dorm. Just things that will fit in the storage provided and I have three of those large Costco rubber/plastic totes that will help as organizers and storage containers for summer storage.

Whelp. Dropped my daughter at college today. The exhaustion I feel is almost like that of when I had just gotten home from delivering her. I am tapped out. Physically and emotionally.

That being said, move in felt easy. We arrived in the morning and saw one roommate was already in the process of moving in so we waited a few hours until she was done. We tackled the bed first as per everyone’s advice here. Then kid and dad built the three things that needed to be assembled. After that she put her clothes in the wardrobe, then the third roommate arrived. The girls never discussed who was getting which bed, but my daughter got the bed she was hoping for, so that worked out well for her.

Next we took her out to dinner which was delicious and it was fun seeing her so excited. Dropped her back at the dorm because she had a party to get to. Her dad and I crashed at the hotel.

Today was breakfast out with daughter and then a final stop at the bookstore for more swag. She didn’t want us to go back to her dorm so we said our goodbyes and I handed her the letter I wrote. She told me she was never going to read it. (She knows it’s an emotional letter, so I don’t blame her for holding off for a while).

I’ve already placed an order to have some cookies delivered to her room for all three of them to enjoy. I know that will put a huge smile on her face. She loves mail, and she loves treats.

She’s been texting me quite a bit sharing all the new fun people she is meeting which makes my heart smile. She’s putting herself out there which is way outside of her comfort zone. She told me multiple times how proud she is of herself. My heart is just gushing. Baby bird is flying…

25 Likes

Son launched! He was very ready, so it made things infinitely easier. The only hiccup was he’s in a triple with one forced loft bed and he had the last move in slot and the other roommates took the regular beds. He is almost a foot taller than both roommates and the bed is fully lofted to put his desk under. He can neither sit up in bed, or stand when getting to desk. He only banged his head a half dozen times during move in - I guess he’ll adapt or have a concussion by the end of the weekend.

11 Likes

Try the residence hall, some may reassign a room if space allows to accommodate his height.

I hope that your sons college is one of those that considers “character” in their admission process. If one of those roommates who are a foot shorter than your poor son hasn’t offered to swap beds by the end of the week, the adcoms have failed miserably.

1 Like

That’s a healthy attitude. I was very happy to lay out the pros and cons, when finally asked for input, only after all of the visited schools were “possibilities”, but none yielded THAT magic “THIS is my school” reaction that all her friends told about.

But I was careful not to push any one college, out of fear I would always blame myself for any unhappy outcome.

She too declared she would pick Barnard over Columbia College — and 3 years in she still has a great time, academically, socially, and with being immersed in NYC.

And frankly, as a parent, I’m truly happy too. Once we all had gone to accepted students day, my wife and I both instantly hoped, THIS would be her choice.

Personalities differ of course, but Barnard truly is a hidden gem with so many distinct advantages. Hopefully your daughter too will continue to love being a “Barnard Girl”.

3 Likes

I hope all your kiddos and families are out of harm’s way or even inconvenienced by Henri. My friend flies out tomorrow to move her kid into NYU and she’s worried about flight delays. I have a friend stuck in DC with canceled flights heading to Providence (his home). Luckily, we fly in after this week so I am hoping the skies will be clear. We are praying for rain in CA and now I’m so confused thinking about life with rain :joy:. I did immediately order headlamp, flashlight, and a small lantern to pack last night. Thinking I should buy a few gallons of water when I’m there despite our family being a huge fan of personal water bottle refills. And maybe a tiny portion of things like crackers; tuna, beef jerky m and peanut butter since they don’t require any microwaving. :joy:

3 Likes

My son has the same issue, in a room with 3 lofted beds. He’s 6’6", about an inch shorter than the lowered ceiling in the bathroom. I dropped him off yesterday, and he’s the first one there so I wanted to help him move the desk out from under the bed (since there’s no way he can sit under there), but he had to get to his Covid test appointment and didn’t want my help. Today the rain in Boston filled up the balcony outside his room (that he can’t access), then by midday he found the carpet in his room was soaked. He pulled out a dresser while waiting for maintenance and the wall behind it is covered in mold, so water must have gotten in before. Ugh. He’s still waiting for maintenance… it seems like they need to have him move out and fix the wall before anyone lives there!