Interesting bec we are also in a rich northeast suburb and as I mentioned before because college admission stress and competition is so high, any sign of celebrations of results or anything to “throw your admissions into people’s faces who may be heartbroken for not having gotten in” is very discouraged - the school has sent us several email reminders of this “rule” just this week! Funny how cultural norms differ even in superficially similar communities.
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@relaxmon i am not sure that having a small gathering with friends and family is “throwing it in everyone’s faces”. Every wants to know (gossip) who got in the next day anyway. Even the students who didn’t get in will find out who did get in. While not getting in can be very disappointing, when applying to highly selective colleges it is expected that most won’t get in ( but someone will and they all hope they are that one). They are not having big parties nor celebrating in school. Getting back up from disappointment is part of life.
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We visited a school last spring that S24 and I both disliked, and he STILL bought a shirt, and wears it 
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Same! The school counselors just had a meeting with all the seniors reviewing not talking about it, celebrate with family quietly, consider not posting right away or at least making sure the tone of the post is appropriate; support your friends who are likely to be rejected or deferred…seems as though it was a great talk to have. East cost /private day school.
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Our experience (also in the NE) is similar to yours.
My D’s school also recommended waiting to publicly celebrate until the spring when everyone had their acceptances in hand.
Empathy towards others is a good thing! Our public school reminds seniors to be considerate of others and possible very raw emotions as well.
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Big/Over the top/grandiose announcements or celebrations are not a thing over in my neck or the woods lol. I’ve never seen anything or heard of anything more than a parent posting on facebook a pic of their kid with the school’s banner. And school counselors or admins making requests about curtailing celebrations?!? Neverrrrrrrr lol. Just not a thing in our community 
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Having empathy for a friend that did not get in to selective school and being happy for a friend that did should not be mutually exclusive. So no one posts on social media and no one celebrates? No one gossips about who got in and didn’t? Seems very idealistic to me. I agree that overtly in your face is terribly wrong. All these hard working kids deserve to go to great schools and most of them will end up at a great school - just maybe not their original first choice.
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Agree I don’t think these emotions are mutually exclusive. Being greeted with a hug and a huge smile and congratulations is different than a friend standing up in class and yelling across the room “OMG Congratulations on XYZ” when said friend knows there are 3 kids sitting in that class that didn’t get in.
Sharing when asked that yes, you are very happy, and changing your insta bio is different than approaching people who were denied ED and offering your services as an essay consultant to ‘help’ them (for a fee of course).
In general I expect my kiddos to be happy for others, and gracious about acknowledging someone’s good news, even if they personally don’t have any. Part of this process is accepting rejection. But I guess I feel that a big acceptance is such a reward, one shouldn’t need much outside validation to go with it, and I’d never want my kids adding to someone else’s pain. Been on both sides of it… So I think it is nice when school gives reminders.
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Interesting. I didn’t realize kids would wear the merch if / when they were accepted ED. 23 has been wearing various sweatshirts since we toured places in November 2021. 
For 23, it’s just a cool shirt or sweatshirt.
I assume 23 will stop wearing them once people start asking if X is their college. They will probably quickly tire of the question.
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I’ve never talked about my child’s acceptances (to private elementary, middle or high schools) on social media and won’t mention where they go to college either. My take is the people who care will know or find out.
We don’t do celebrations here with lots of decorating. A lot of folks around here would be thinking of what would end up in a landfill. That’s the culture where I live. Lol
I’ve never heard of that happening in DC, Maryland, Delaware, or Virginia but maybe it does in some areas. It’s interesting to hear what rituals and traditions happen in other parts of the country.
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My D19’s school had what I thought was a really cute tradition: they would post outside the counselor’s office a small (8x11) poster stating, eg, “Congrats to State U! Accepted by Student Name!” And kids would stop by and write things or draw little doodles on the poster.
I really liked the reversal of the whole game.
It wasn’t done day of acceptance, but rather after May 1, once decisions were made.
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We made a rule with D21 that, no matter how much she liked a school, she couldn’t get any gear (except from her parents’ alma maters because there was already a connection). Our D23, on the other hand, has been collecting college sweatshirts for years – some places where she has applied, but mostly schools she either wouldn’t consider, or wouldn’t get in! All of her friends seem to do this. Commitment/bed parties aren’t a thing in our area, but D23 and her friends have been celebrating/commiserating decisions as they come in. When D21 made her decision, we invited some close friends over so she could share where she’d decided to go, and we’ll likely do the same with D23. There seems to be extra buzz in the hallways in mid-December for ED announcements and again mid-March. I love hearing where kids are going to college so appreciate social media posts about final decisions. I could live without the “my kid got into” posts, though 
.
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Ha of course all of the above (posting, celebrating, wearing the sweatshirt next day to school) happen despite being strongly discouraged by the school. My kid and his friend group won’t do those though, like I said kids with deferrals and rejections will be too raw… Agree there should be a balance of some kind.
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The kids at our local high school wear their college sweatshirts on Decision Day in May and post an announcement on social media - that’s about it for public celebrations.
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Feels like I’m the only one just hoping my DS makes it through the last few weeks of this semester. He chose online early college (no college close by so this is community college online), and trying to learn calculus and physics just by reading the textbook and doing the homework has not been a good plan for him. So far I’ve failed in getting him to reach out to strangers (tutors) for help, and the teachers have not helped either. Add the stress of awaiting an ED decision (and more importantly whether it will actually be affordable like the NPC showed), and getting dropped by a long-distance girlfriend, and then there’s the distraction of the World Cup soccer games on Tick Tock… ack! I’ll be glad when the semester is over even if it results in a lower GPA, even if the ED doesn’t work out… at least Calc 2 and Physics will be over!
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Apologize in advance for posting in this thread. I am parent of senior but I wanted to ask if cc has any forum for wannabe writers? To connect with like minded folks and get help for myself?
I don’t believe so but you could post in the parent cafe
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I love this!
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