Parents of the HS Class of 2024

Goucher is a great school. I’ve gotten to know some of the faculty/programs there and they are doing really good work.

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I had my doubts about my D’s ED1 application–just wasn’t convinced that it was a fit socially. She ended up being deferred, which she took remarkably well. (I didn’t share my feelings until a couple of years later.) The only downside was that she had written many supplemental essays, so she didn’t have the best holiday season. (Luckily a few schools had January 15th deadlines.) Ultimately, she got into her ED1 choice, but decided on a different school which was similar, but stronger in one of her interests and a couple of hours closer to home.

Looking back on that experience, I realize that she probably would have been fine at her ED1 school, but I wish that schools would get rid of binding ED. It adds another level of unnecessary pressure. Good luck to you and your D!

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glad to be of service :face_with_diagonal_mouth:

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I’d say more people should zig when others are zagging, but that is self-defeating advice . . . .

If you don’t offer it, I think many people won’t ask. For the most part we kept our answers vague. “He has some good options but is waiting for all decisions to make a final decision” “He is planning on atttending accepted students day before choosing.”

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Same here w D30! I’m not sure I’ll make it through her middle and high school years.

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Yup these kinds of nonspecific but more or less positive positioning statements are important to have in your pocket. Especially if you’re in a nosey community or have family members who won’t stop pestering.

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Exactly. Many people have asked where our child is applying. We just tell him all over. High, mid and low. Keeping it vague has stopped many questions my child does not want to answer.

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Vague here too! They keep asking me what’s his dream school, and oh he’ll get in anywhere he wants?! What even?! I just smile and say times have changed, lots of strong candidates get rejected nowadays. I never say what school he is hoping for, none of their business. I remember never asking a kid about where they are applying or hoping to go, I always found it so intrusive and stress inducing for the poor kid.

I’m keen to not even mention it anywhere until he’s actually matriculated. lol

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Maybe I’ll start saying - we will let you know when she graduates in 2028.

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Yale is also particularly popular at S24’s school this year. The school typically sends a few kids to Yale each year - it is one of two Ivies that seem to really like our kids. But this year over 15 percent of the class applied SCEA. A good number of these kids have strong connections to Yale though (major donors and the like), so I don’t think the large number of Yale applications is driven by a shift in tastes towards Yale. Last year, Brown was particularly popular in the early round, and that did not work out so well.

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I was in your shoes five years ago with my first, so I sympathize!

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I told D24 that we’re having a graduation party for her regardless of where she decides to go because we’re going to celebrate her working so hard to reach HS graduation. (It’s also for us parents to celebrate and say, “YAY! WE DID IT! We got our kid to the finish line and haven’t royally screwed up!” But I didn’t tell HER that) :joy:

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THIS!!

D24 is the same. We agreed to apply to only true safeties and matches. My D says that her entire class is delusional when it comes to applying to tippy-top colleges irrespective of what the past record of students’ acceptances to these elite schools. She goes to a highly competitive public so it wasn’t entirely unexpected.

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Exactly! I tend to call answers like these my ‘elevator speech.’ Especially when well-intended (but uninformed) people you know ask you where your kid is/has applied, you tell them where, and then they scrunch up their nose and say with his off-putting tone of voice, “College X? Why in the world would you have Kid apply THERE?”

You should have seen & heard some of the looks and snotty responses I got from people in person when I told them that D24 had applied to 2 state public universities in NM. Some of them acted like it was one of the worst ideas they’d ever heard.

…but then (thanks to the elevator speech), I’d tell them about the auto merit scholarships and how much we’d likely be paying compared to in state options and then their tone totally changed because the NM schools were cheaper. :joy:

Or how a good friend of mine scrunched up his nose in disgust when learning that D24 had applied to 2 schools in TX. I used the elevator speech on him, too. :slight_smile:

Just wait until a few months from now and all of our kids are making decisions on where to go…the weird looks and dumb comments from people are going to be coming in fast & furious! :joy:

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Vague answers are great for getting others to back off just enough so they’re not nagging and hassling you about it.

With other parents I know, I’ve switched to a more broad question of something like, “Does Kid have any plans for after graduation?” This leaves it open to non-college plans also, like going to a trade school, joining the military, etc. Those are all great post-HS plans, too. :slight_smile:

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A graduation party is up in the air for us too – my son doesn’t want one unless alcohol is allowed (for ALL guests, including teens) and that’s a big no from me.

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Most of D24’s cousins are close in age, and there was a big cluster applying for college last year. I ended up accidentally being that annoying nosy person asking about college. One went into great detail about various college options, plans, why they had changed from X to Y, etc. It was great, the longest conversation I’ve had with them ever. Another one, it was a touchy subject and I had no idea it would be (college educated parents, did well in HS etc. so I just assumed) I don’t know what they are up to this year because I haven’t dared bring up the topic again!

I learned too late about the asking about “plans” after graduation.

As far as graduation parties go, If D24 wants one we will make it happen. My sister did a whole huge “rent a community center with some other moms” and have a drop in reception type thing with picture boards and tons of food last year. I was ???!!! that is NOT a thing where I live but it is what everyone does in her small midwest town. (Not everyone rents the community center, most just do it from their homes and it’s several hours of just wandering about the town congratulating all the seniors you know and eating and chatting).

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Yes having a couple of genric answers is what I am planning to have. We do have a few nosy friends/family members.

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One of the colleagues here keeps asking is he applying to the ivies and when I say no. The next question is why not :). I am hoping being Vague will discourage them to ask more questions.

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