Parents Weekend--What worked for us

Parents Forum
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<p>We just got back from Family Weekend - that's their name for it. We saw a lot of DD, off campus eating, shopping, and we went to football game together. Fewer of her friends are football nuts and she grew up with it. She seemed to enjoy the time away from school people, but by Saturday night she was ready for us to leave her to go to her party. By Sunday after shopping and brunch it was really time for goodbye. She needed to rejoin her own community. </p>

<p>School had a lot of activities available for parents/students or both. We let her decide how many she wanted to do together. The highlight, though, was the open invitation to attend classes. We were able to attend 4 of her major classes,including her lesson, and meet and hear her studio classmates. Everyone was so gracious and interested in having the parents there. Older S's did not have that for their weekends. </p>

<p>Was able to just listen to her and help her work though some possible solutions to issues, but on the whole, found her happy and engaged.</p>

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<p>S-1's freshman year we loved having the tables turned and see him comfortable in his new home, pointing out his favorite places and people, compared to all the commotion and uncertainty of orientation. My advice is to let the kid be your proud tourguide and let him/her take charge as much as possible. Some things you want they don't need, so if they don't know where to make a dinner reservation as freshmen, that's very understandable. We loved meeting S's friends, since they were all new to us and a big part of his new life. The music and theater departments had shows, just waiting for parents' weekend as a focal point. There were sports highlights, too, but that interests us less. Something for everyone.</p>

<p>We did find restaurants too crowded in the small town, so the following year I brought in food and had S and friend arrange for use of a kitchen lounge normally used by students. He emailed and some other parents brought in, too, so we had a pot-luck dinner for Friday night. We pulled together coffee tables so had to eat hunched over from couches, which wasn't ideal, but people enjoyed each others' company well enough. It wasn't noisy or crowded. The next night we enjoyed restaurants in the town, but met at 5 p.m. to avoid the most crowded times. Parents were lined up out into the streets of the small town by 6 p.m.</p>

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<p>Since we weren't staying over and transportation costs were at a minimum, we splurged on restaurant and took D to Cafe des artiste. It was quite a shock to see her order a champagne cocktail (she is 20) only because it looked so sophisticated and grown up.</p>

<p>She enjoyed wearing a lovely dress I paid for but had never seen. </p>

<p>It was a day of torrential rains; we spent the afternoon cozy at the Lincoln Center Loews and the restaurant was just around the corner. The murals are spectacular.</p>

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<p>We are leaving today to visit S in University of Michigan. Thanks to all of you for the great advice. I mentioned to S what I wanted to do while I was there - letting him know he would still have plenty of time to spend with friends without parents hovering over him. The only disappointment - he won't take us to see the fraternity house he's joining!</p>

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<p>I was reminded this weekend what it's like to have a first visit with a freshman on campus for Parent's Weekend when that weekend coincides with Halloween... very, very interesting.</p>

<p>That being said, we got in typical stuff... shopping, tour, eating out, meeting friends, etc.</p>

<p>My plane was scheduled to arrive Friday afternoon in time for us to drive to D2's school, and catch some of her a cappella group's rehearsal. They were not going to be able to participate in the general a cappella fair with the other groups this weekend because so many of their members are in the musical. Dang it if my plane wasn't delayed three hours - I was practically crying in the airport. </p>

<p>However, at rehearsal, the group must have discussed other parents wanting them to do an impromptu performance, because Saturday afternoon (after the rain finally stopped, and the sun came out), they gave us a sneak peak. At that moment, watching my daughter, I knew she was incredibly happy where she's at. I couldn't believe how much she has bonded with people so quickly.</p>

<p>When we went out shopping on Saturday, she didn't even ask for any new clothes, etc. for herself. She just wanted to get some stuff to put together a Halloween costume. We found a very plain, modest black dress, she printed off pictures of the planets from the internet, glued them to foam board, then glued them to the dress with fabric glue, and she was Miss Frizzle from Magic School Bus. I think out of 18 years she's had of Halloween, this was the cutest costume of all!</p>

<p>Anyway, her roommate goes home every weekend (for her job), so we had a little more freedom hanging out in her room in between things to do. H and I went to see the musical last night, but since she's seeing it with one of her classes on Thursday, she chose to use the time to work on her costume. </p>

<p>Oh, what was a BIG, BIG, BIG, hit was my suggestion that she come back to our hotel room with us for a bit, and enjoy a nice, long bath. She rubbed it into everyone's nose she could when she got back. Hearing her a cappella group made our trip worth it to us, and her having the opportunity to take a long, hot bath made our trip worth it to her. :)</p>

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<p>Parents' Weekend for us was wonderful as well! What a pleasure to meet her shiny-faced friends and their parents and to see DD in her environment. She is just so happy. She and four of her friends arranged for all of the girls and their parents to eat Saturday dinner together, and we all got along as if we had known each other for years. DD kept saying to other kids she ran into, "Come meet my parents!" That made our hearts swell. The whole weekend was pure delight, even though it was lousy weather for a good part of it. And, I didn't even think about crying when it was time to leave. I think we are all getting used to this change. Seeing her so happy and comfortable is such a relief... :) Now it doesn't feel like such a terribly long time until Thanksgiving...</p>