<p>Is every single kid going on to college, or do they list things other than that? At my son's hs, not everyone goes to college, so this would be an even more uncomfortable situation.</p>
<p>I knew there was something wrong with the sports analogy, but couldn't put it into words.</p>
<p>My kids' high school newspaper does the "senior edition" in May. Students are invited to submit their after high school plans and any scholarships they have received. The last time I saw it published I would estimate that maybe half of the senior class had submitted their info. I know my own S did not submit his because it was not important to him. All his friends knew where he was going and what kind of scholarship he got and he didn't care if the rest of the world knew it or not.</p>
<p>The thing I don't like is that our local newpaper sends a reporter to the senior awards night of each of the two high schools in our town. They list the awards in the paper and total up the dollar value of all the awards combined for each school. I disagree with this practice because it makes it like a competition between the two schools and their students as if whichever school has the most scholarship money is the better school. It should be a celebration of a milestone achievement, not a contest.</p>
<p>We just got word from my son's high school that they are not going to even say the schools that the kids got scholarships from. Usually, they just call the kid's name, and say the schools (no dollar amounts or anything). But they have even dropped that.</p>
<p>As far as newspapers go, our town paper is fairly defunct and if the HS were to print an end of year issue (which they wouldn't; the boys would never manage to get that done) it would probably feature stories about the undercooked sausages served and kids spending the night in their cars at the "Annual No-Girls-Allowed Sausage Festival and Camp Out." Oh, and maybe a few tidbits on who smoked what cigar on senior cigar day. LOL</p>
<p>I agree with the opt in/opt out idea. Our school also has one of those senior issue things where those who choose to can submit a message and/or their plans for the next year, but it is certainly not compulsary. We also make a big list on the band room chalkboard of where the band seniors are going next year--again, opt in/opt out. Most people write down where they are going, and probably a third of the kids this year are going first to community colleges, and they don't seem to have any issues making that known. It's just nice to know what people's plans are, and to congratulate those who do get in somewhere exceptional. For example, one of the kids in my band who is very quiet and keeps to himself wrote down that he was going to West Point. Because sometimes kids write down joke schools for themselves/for their friends, I asked him if he really was going or if that was a joke, and when he said that he really was going I had the opportunity to give him the sincere congratulations that he deserved and that probably wouldn't have been forthcoming had we not had the list. </p>
<p>People are generally pretty sensitive about other people's plans, although of course there are always a few uncomfortable moments. Actually, I would say that I have experienced more uncomfortable moments than most people, even though Wellesley is as good a school as any that my classmates are attending (the other top ones being Northwestern, UChicago, and maybe Duke (classmate accepted off waitlist and hasn't decided yet)), because even though I hardly projected the information from a mountain top, a lot of people knew that I applied to the Ivies and so immediately ask me if I am going to an Ivy League school, which of course I have to answer no and try not to feel lame explaining about Wellesley since they usually haven't heard of it. So...I wish people would just ask me where I was going, instead of making me rehash all my rejections/waitlists/acceptances!</p>
<p>I do not disagree that there is a privacy issue involved and some may not want their information published. What I do disagree with is the alleged rationale that by eliminating the pictures and lists they are somehow alleviating "stress". To me, that is on its face absurd.</p>
<p>Protect privacy? Sure. Opt in or opt out? Sure. But stress? Oh, please.</p>
<p>The idea is that it takes away the "college admissions as a competition" issue. It would alleviate stress if people didn't make such a gigantic deal about where everyone was going. At least for me, anyway.</p>
<p>The sports stories are of accomplishments, not the future of every participant in the sport. The HS papers are good- did anyone have outlandish futures proposed in theirs?- mine did. Chevda- Stress is very real for the person with it, please acknowledge that others may not cope with some issues as well, or may have issues you are totally unaware of.</p>
<p>
[quote]
Chevda- Stress is very real for the person with it, please acknowledge that others may not cope with some issues as well, or may have issues you are totally unaware of.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>No doubt. No one can know every individual's stress level, nor what causes them stress. So maybe we should eliminate grades, since those cause significant stress. And testing, standardized or not, since we are all well aware of "test anxiety". Oh, and how about the stress of applications? Or deciding where to apply? Job applications? </p>
<p>Stress is part of life and by refusing to teach children how to deal with it constructively, we are doing them a huge disservice.</p>
<p>bethievt:
Sorry for the delayed reply. Actually, two of his class of 140 did not get in anywhere they applied, so they stated this as "undecided." I personally see no shame in opting out of college or taking time off; college is not right for everyone and there are other ways to learn. Where would we all be if everyone went on with academics and auto mechanics, plumbing, bricklaying, etc. all became dying arts?</p>
<p>I totally agree that college is not the best plan for everyone, but I do think the stress is a real issue. We've all probably read the andison story. This guy and his family were really stressed by his lack of acceptances and I would be too if it had happened to my son. These kinds of public lists and announcements, I think, just rub salt into open wounds. I have 3 friends with sons who have decided not to go to college and it's a touchy subject for them and their kids. And don't get me started on grandparents...</p>
<p>Agree totally. I can't imagine being in my kids' shoes and all of the stress on them at this age. It's bad enough dealing with stress as a seasoned adult. That's why I like what sons's school does, but I'd hate to see these newspaper announcements.</p>
<p>Chedva - The stress surrounding college admissions is unncessary and excessive. Unncessary and excessive stress is not "a part of life", can be reduced, and is ESPECIALLY not the job of educators and parents to impose and/or endorse.</p>
<p>Great discussion! I agree that publishing information on all students may be well-intentioned, but often has unintended consequences. I realize the analogy with sports is flawed, but somehow people are more accepting of showering accolades on an athlete than on a scholar - although we seem to have become jealous of anyone who accomplishes something. We are so quick to take a stab at anyone (adult or student) who is successful. I have two daughters, one is 27, the other 17. I have heard more nasty comments from other parents about kids at sporting events, school functions, etc., than I did ten years ago. Either this is just a NASTY bunch of parents or times - they are a changin'.</p>