Please grade my essay - BB test#1

<p>It is important to question the ideas and questions of people in positions of authority. People in authority have the capacity to err, and outsiders can be able to help them. </p>

<pre><code> The world has seen, for example, a variety of oppressive and totalitarian regimes, in which people in positions of authority make amoral decisions and spread radical ideology. The British Imperialist policies of the Victorian Era were justified by propagandists claiming it to be the burden of "civilized" Europeans to educate and "reform" the peoples of the British colonies in Asia and Africa. If the public had found out more about the native peoples whom the British Empire were taking over, they would have seen for themselves that the "uncivilized" people were actually very cultured and educated. The public did not find out what actually went on in Asia and Africa, and simply accepted the ideas pushed in front of them. As a result, many indigenous people were colonized by Britain for many years.

 Religious authorities sometimes have supported fallacious theory. Galileo, a scientist and a Catholic, expressed an opinion based on previous findings stating that the planets in the Solar System revolved around the Sun, and not the Earth. The Catholic Church had taught its followers that the planets in the solar system revolved around the Earth for centuries. The Church demanded that Galileo submit to its authority and take back the claims of a heliocentric (sun-centered) solar System. Galileo turned out to be right, and later on, the church admitted that the planets in the Solar System went around the Sun. If Galileo had not attempted to refute the Church's teachings,  the church might have maintained its old teaching for much longer than it did. Questioning authority may prove to be beneficial to the group or organization itself, not detrimental. 

  Authority requires some respect and obedience in order to be effective. However, like any other system, it will always be flawed, which makes it necessary for outsiders to check its power.

</code></pre>

<p>Thanks!</p>

<p>Prompt for the essay :</p>

<p>Is it important to question the ideas and decisions of people in positions of authority</p>

<p>icverity,</p>

<p>Fantastic essay for BB # 1. I would give you a 11. The essay flows very well. Your examples are very good; British Imperialism and Galileo. You exhibit a strong control over your words which is fantastic. </p>

<p>Question: Did you fill up all the space given for the essay response in the answer booklet? I’m assuming you did.</p>

<p>Now this essay gets an 11 and not a 12 because of one thing: vocabulary. Your vocabulary level isn’t high enough. There are many opportunities to throw in some SAT vocabulary in the essay. If you incorporate some high level vocabulary, this is a solid 12. From this essay alone I can tell you’re an intelligent person who writes decently, so most of your essays fall in this 11 range. As soon as you start bringing SAT vocabulary into the essay, you’ll be set for a solid 12. Don’t force it; graders are trained to see when someone just over-uses SAT words and forces them. So, cautiously sprinkle them in your essays and you’ll hit the 12 mark. Aside from that, this is a fantastic essay, great job! Hope I helped, good luck :)!</p>

<p>~Aceventura74</p>

<p>Thank you! :slight_smile:
btw, I wrote this essay on a plain notepaper.</p>

<p>Icverity,</p>

<p>I strongly suggest you print out mock answer booklets from CB website, they really do help you prepare. Both the essay as well as MC. For MC prep, if you just circle in the book, you don’t replicate the exact time because it takes 1 second to bubble in on your answer booklet. Print pages 3-9 for each exam; yes its a pain, however its the best way to truly replicate testing conditions. </p>

<p><a href=“https://satonlinecourse.collegeboard.com/SR/digital_assets/pdfs/eri/exams/directionsAndAnswerSheet.pdf[/url]”>https://satonlinecourse.collegeboard.com/SR/digital_assets/pdfs/eri/exams/directionsAndAnswerSheet.pdf&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>~Aceventura74</p>