<p>I've been noticing an awful lot of threads popping up with people wondering if this pre-M10 letter or that pre-M10 email "means anything" and I can't help but think it's a lot of wasted energy and needless fretting. I especially feel for those who did not receive any communication who now think they have no chance in HADES (see what I did there!).</p>
<p>These communications may or may not mean anything. No one can really tell you. And if someone does, and you listen, and they were wrong...how's that going to make you feel? My advice is to A) keep this stuff to yourself until after M10 (because it just spins up the fretting — for you and for others), B) TRY NOT TO READ TOO MUCH INTO IT.</p>
<p>I was not going to start a new thread on this as the board is getting cluttered enough, but felt it was important to get the message out. I understand that people are anxious...but really, CHILL PEOPLE.</p>
<p>But isn’t that what this website is for? For us to ask questions and get other peoples’ opinions? It’s nice to know that many are or have been in our position, and getting comments and advice is comforting. True, it could be false advice, but if I get a rejection, I’m not going to think ‘but unicorn29 said I was a shoo-in!’ The thing is this could be a major turning point in all our lives and ‘chilling’ and not worrying about March 10th is easier said than done.
I do apologize though if I made anyone fret more, I’m really sorry- I didn’t know better.</p>
<p>This is precisely what this entire website is for. I don’t know what thread you started that feel the need to apologize for @whyamievenhere, but there is no need. CC is an open public forum for expression of opinion or viewpoints surrounding the educational process. Some of those opinions may reflect anxiety and for the most part the redponsive posts reflect support and understanding. Every post should be read as just one of many points of view and nobody spending time on this site can be said to have the last word on anything. I for one appreciate and feel better learning that this admittedly over the top anxiety is being experienced by others. I also know that it is temporary and I will laugh about my behavior later. For the moment, you have found a safe place to express yourself and shouldn’t feel stifled in your expression one iota. This is my fifth trip down this road (sixth if I count Eaglebrook) and each child has brought their own set of challenges and my own worries. It always ends up fine, I just found CC this time. </p>
<p>I would have to agree with @smushysmom and @whyiamievenhere.</p>
<p>7D, I completely appreciate your instinct to want to calm the waters, and NO ONE is more grateful than me – to you and the other seasoned BS parents here. You have all been patient with our inexperience and asking the same questions you’ve all heard a hundred times. </p>
<p>However, it rankles when someone tells you to “chill out” about a life changing event or makes you feel that talking about these issues is bothersome to others. </p>
<p>I had this happen on another thread, too, in the fall - when I asked a question and a reply was basically “stop bothering us and just call the school.” People who are here, newbies and seasoned parents, are here because they choose to be. To actively participate (daily) on a discussion board about prep school admissions and then be annoyed when people are obsessing about prep school admissions…well, that makes no sense. </p>
<p>I am certain that you are trying to be a calming voice in the chaos and panic. And it’s appreciated by everyone.
Just consider that there is a difference between saying “don’t worry, and try not to read into X” and saying “stop posting/keep it to yourself.” Kids and parents who are new to this are freaking out, and stressed, and with good reason. We are all aware that we will not know anything for sure until M10. We get it. But talking to others that are in the same boat is helpful. </p>
<p>Please, newbies are here for a reason. We do not need the holier than thou attitude. The very purpose of this forum is to vent and get information. Live and let live and ignore posts you cannot be bothered to reply to.</p>
<p>I couldn’t agree with some of you more. I think that a few of the veteran “posters” really try to jump in and squash what this board is really for. If the veterans don’t like the thread, simply move on and quit trying to control everything. </p>
<p>I want to be calm and 9 times out of 10 I do feel calmer after I visit this site. It makes me feel better to know there are others out there who are nervously second-guessing themselves at some points and calmly walking through the day knowing they’ve done all they could at others. I like knowing kids are excited and nervous about their future and are aware of the tremendous opportunity BS can be and want to support them too. My own D is at least acting like she hasn’t given BS a thought since January 15 and only will discuss when she’s trapped in a car with me and can’t feign sleep to get out of it. She’s the epitome of CHILLING and it is driving me even more bonkers. I will, however, be the first person to ridicule my own obsession, especially after March 10. </p>
<p>I wouldn’t want to alienate the veterans; one of the things this board is “really for” is the exchange of information, and they are the ones who have it. :-)</p>
<p>You know, if you hang here long enough, you DO sorta get tired of reading the same things over and over again, and you do hope that those new to the forum would start by spending time reading the archives and searching for answers to questions that may already have been asked many, many times before starting redundant threads, but I agree with those who point out that this IS a public forum and people are free to do and say whatever they want. The veterans are also free to disregard anything that annoys them as well, and I admit I sometimes have a hard time doing this when a comment pushes a button. I don’t have any issue with people coming here to worry or pass the time, but I do wish everyone would just worry on one thread and pass the time on another without starting so many redundant threads. That’s just my anal aversion to clutter speaking, and I realize most of the “offenders” are kids. If I were a moderator (and you can all be glad I’m not), I would consolidate all the anxiety topics into one “Henny Penny” thread and all the what-to-do-now conversations into one “Let’s Watch Water Boil” thread. ;)</p>
<p>So, hang in there SevenDad, I know where you’re coming from.</p>
<p>“That’s just my anal aversion to clutter speaking,”</p>
<p>LOL ChoatieMom! Thanks for the chuckle I totally see both sides. As a first-timer going through this process, finding CC late in the game was a blessing and a curse! A blessing bc it’s been super helpful for these last few pieces of the puzzle, but a curse bc it’s slightly elevated the anxiety level for me. However, I find that I’m much better equipped for any scenario, and that’s in GREAT part thanks to the veterans who may seem pessimistic to some, but for me as a mom, I like the slap of reality in the face. I’d rather head into the process well-grounded in reality than up in the clouds with nowhere to go but down… So I am very grateful for all of you veterans, to be sure! But I’m also super thankful for all the first-timers and newbies bc they ask the questions I would’ve never known to ask. I know the archives are there, as are old posts. But unless they’ve been bumped, it’s extremely frustrating to go digging around page after page of old posts. And I appreciate having more current info as well :)</p>
<p>But all that being said, I think SevenDad is just wanting to ground us all in the reality that we can “see” what we want to see, but in the end, what we read into it won’t make a lick of a difference. Whatever will happen will happen, whether we worry about it (like me) or not (like Moosieboy). And with all our anxiety and stress, SevenDad is just hoping to remind us to take a deep breath :)</p>
<p>“Take a deep breath folks and try not to read too much into anything!” Kids, do your homework." That could have done the trick without room for misinterpretation. And starting a new thread to express that thought would seem to belie the aversion to threads proliferating like snakes from the head of Medusa. </p>
<p>I was under the impression that CC was a forum for discussion where questions about this process might be answered by others with some experience. I certainly hope prep school teachers are no so quick to admonish curiosity among their students. Apparently some on this forum do indeed believe there is such a thing as a stupid question. </p>
<p>“I actually think OP has everyone’s best interest at heart…”</p>
<p>I think from the beginning of this thread, we all agreed that 7D was trying to help us. And I think I took great care to word my post as such, so please do not misrepresent what I actually said as an attack against anyone. I AM very grateful for everyone’s help, 7D’s included (perhaps especially). </p>
<p>But honestly, as a newbie, sometimes we do feel scolded and that runs against what I perceive this board to be about: a place to ask the dumb questions and to find a sounding board as you are trying to make informed decisions about what’s important in the process and approach. And worrying and waiting is easier when there is camaraderie. </p>
<p>“If you hang around here long enough” I’m sure you do get tired of the same-old same-old, but it is a choice to keep hanging around here, and you must know that you are going to see the same cycle of questions every year, right? The board is called “Prep School Admissions” so the focus is always going to be on admissions, isn’t it? </p>
<p>And searching for answers that have already been asked is not very easy, as sometimes they are buried in threads of a hundred posts. </p>
<ul>
<li><p>“They didn’t even send me that email… uh-oh”</p></li>
<li><p>“What? Now I’m worried… It seems like everyone but me is getting letters. Especially since I got 99th percentile overall on the test. Maybe they’ve determined that I’m too bad for them…”</p></li>
<li><p>“[SCREEN NAME] seems to have gotten an acceptance.</p></li>
<li><p>“But maybe that means I’m rejected.”</p></li>
</ul>
<p>These are all taken from recent posts…I think all penned by students, and none of them — besides an interjectory “What?” — are questions. It’s things like this that spurred me to start this thread early this AM. (Note to self, do not post before your first cup of coffee.)</p>
<p>I certainly did not expect the drubbing I have received. (Not my first, btw.) Thanks to those that read my original post in the spirit that it was intended…to try and lower the anxiety level around here. Perhaps I chose my words poorly, but I make no apologies for the sentiment behind them.</p>
<h2>And is it just me, or is there a heck of a lot more anxiety this app cycle?</h2>
<p>@travel: Note that there is a big difference in curiosity and needless worry/pointless prognostication.</p>
<p>@booklady123 You took great care to not admonish 7D. </p>
<p>Finding past threads is incredibly difficult. I wanted to comment/update a question posed yesterday and can not find it. Very frustrating! </p>
<p>I think 7d probably got the hint and will take more care with his posts in the future. Or he may chose to step away for the next two weeks because he is so sanguine about it all. Certainly he is entitled to keep doing exactly what he has been doing as well.</p>
<p>Definitely appreciate the commitment from the Senior posters and I have learned a lot from them. I hope to continue the unfettered exchange of questions/comments/thoughts etc. in a respectful and supportive manner as I think most on this forum do quite successfully. </p>
I totally see both sides. As a first-timer going through this process, finding CC late in the game was a blessing and a curse! A blessing bc it’s been super helpful for these last few pieces of the puzzle, but a curse bc it’s slightly elevated the anxiety level for me. However, I find that I’m much better equipped for any scenario, and that’s in GREAT part thanks to the veterans who may seem pessimistic to some, but for me as a mom, I like the slap of reality in the face. I’d rather head into the process well-grounded in reality than up in the clouds with nowhere to go but down… So I am very grateful for all of you veterans, to be sure! But I’m also super thankful for all the first-timers and newbies bc they ask the questions I would’ve never known to ask. I know the archives are there, as are old posts. But unless they’ve been bumped, it’s extremely frustrating to go digging around page after page of old posts. And I appreciate having more current info as well :)</p>