Oh my, we are so surprised about DS acceptance results. Knew the Ivies would be hit or miss, but surprised to be WL at some of the LACs and denied by a few. Did get into Carleton and two state schools, but that’s it. Definitely was up front about needing financial aid. Anyone have any ideas about what might have happened? I’m feeling kind of naive about it all–was there some very important quality that colleges are looking for that he missed? We didn’t do SAT coaching or college application coaching…am now wishing that perhaps we should have dug deep and done that. Here’s his stats:
Graduating HS a year early
Will be valedictorian in his public HS class of 500, GPA weighted 4.5 something
Took and received As in all college 200 level math courses available to him in the area
Has received all As for the college 300 level literature course he is taking
SAT of 2200 (perhaps a bit low for his ambitions)
800 in the SAT II for math, and 760 in the SAT II for physics
two varsity sports, third at state in one of those sports
pretty good EC, including starting and leading a math club at a local title one middle school so the kids could participate in math competitions
at least two over the top recommendations (“in my 40 years of being a teacher and guidance counselor, I have never encountered a learner such as this”)
IB diploma (in first two years of high school)
worked tutoring calculus at local community college
Essay not stellar, but pretty good–talked about the turning point when he decided to actually challenge himself.
Semi rural area.
He didn’t need to prep for the SAT with a 2200. What LACs were WLs and which were denies? Personally I think Carleton is a fabulous option. My younger D wanted to go there but was WLed.
You only need one acceptance. The rest is just noise.
Is Carleton affordable for your family with the financial aid package you’re receiving? If it is, then your son’s problems are solved. He has a great place to go to college and really, nothing else matters.
If Carleton is not affordable, come back and tell us the names of the state schools. Some people here probably know them and could contribute some thoughts on them.
I know! That’s my feeling as well, and I believe Carleton is a great school–AND, he did get a great scholarship/financial aid package. As a parent, I am very grateful, and hope to get to a place where he will be happy and grateful as well. However, I have this broken-hearted, self doubting, angry 170 lb kid on my couch…
Forgot to say he’s is also a Natl. Merit Scholarship award winner…
We were there 2 years ago. Waitlisted at Scripps, Rice, and Davidson, Rejected at Pomona. Looking at those Wellesley and Occidental acceptances with gratitude but wondering what happened. There are just a ton of kids out there applying with good grades, scores, and solid involvement in ECs (who write good essays, have good rec, and show interest). I still don’t understand how it all works, but I am more willing to say there is a random aspect to it – when in the reader’s day your app is read; something that connects to the reader who is given your app. 6 years ago mine who was accepted at MIT was WL at Carleton. I don’t believe anything was wrong with your son’s app – if there was, Carleton wouldn’t have accepted him. I do think the mindset of “I would be happy to go to any of these colleges” needs to be stressed throughout the application process. And that ED needs to be considered for most excellent students if your family can meet your EFC. And that kids may need to apply to more low reach/match schools if having a choice at the end is super important.
I understand your feelings (“if my kid didn’t get into these schools, who did?”). But I’d like to offer the view from the other end. My younger daughter is finishing her senior year at Carleton. She chose to go there in lieu of schools including the University of Chicago, Pomona, and Amherst. Among the schools that did not accept her were Dartmouth, Brown, Middlebury, and Stanford. She was tied for top in her class of 500, was a National Merit Scholarship finalist, an All-State scholar, had taken a college-level math class, played an instrument, was in a sport, 2350 SAT, 35 ACT.
I think she has received a great education at Carleton. She received very generous financial aid. She has won academic awards, some of which came with $$. She will be starting at her “ideal” job in July, three weeks after graduation. Your son will be able to shine at Carleton.
Broken-hearted eighteen year old boys are tough to deal with, I’m sure. I do not know how to get a child from there to where they need to be, and where they should be, which is excited about their future. Here are some thoughts, all of which go through my head, and, don’t know which might work for your child.
First, college admissions isn’t a contest or tournament. You only get to go to one school. If the school you can go to is one you can see yourself at, it won’t matter at all where you didn’t get in (they lost out on you!).
Second, Carleton is terrific – if that’s the best option, start imagining yourself there, planning and plotting your future.
Three, what happened? the elite colleges are difficult to get into. Carleton has a 20% acceptance rate. In 1997, U Chicago apparently had a >50% acceptance rate, down to 8% now! At rates like that, great students don’t get in everywhere. That’s what happened to your student. There’s really no need to look further for answers and no point, either. The key is to realize that college admissions are an opportunity to do something more, with the options you are given not an evaluation of you or your worth or your choices.
OP, you can never tell quite what it is. Sometimes, it’s as simple as geographic diversity- tho you’re semi-rural, there could have been lots of great candidates from your closest metro area. Or another applicant from a nearby hs who presented some special match. Or sometimes, there’s a surplus in applicants aiming for certain majors. Or a couple of other kids added some value (the proverbial bassoonist the school needs next fall.)
Sometimes, graduating early can mean that last year of hs activities isn’t there. But as others have said, Carleton is a great win. Almost not worth worrying about all this. Sometimes, I just look at these things as the hand of the gods or fate.
My kid who applied to Bowdoin and Carleton was WL at both (accepted at UChicago, Tufts, UMD and Rochester, rejected at Swat and Georgetown). His app (2290, full IB, 13 APs, leadership, unusual combo of ECs) just didn’t click with LACs, and in the end, that was probably a good call. Have a couple of friends whose kids went to Carleton and they were VERY happy.
The admit rates at competitive LACs is just crazy these days, only slightly less so than Ivies. It’s not a personal rejection, though I know it feels that way. There are just so many kids throwing apps wherever they think they might stick, and it clutters the field for kids who are truly serious about a given school. It becomes a vicious circle.
We told our kids that if they didn’t get rejections, they didn’t reach high enough. Even my 2380, mega-stat and multiple national STEM award winner was rejected and waitlisted at schools.
And the next time it happens (which it will, if he goes to any type of graduate school), he’ll probably adjust in about an hour rather than a week because he will understand how arbitrary the system is.
Yes, Carleton is a great option, and the big thing is/was setting expectations.
Essays/written stuff are VERY important.
Especially when the admit rate is around 10%. At a 50% admit rate, they’re looking for reasons to admit you. At a 10% admit rate, they’re looking for reasons to deny you (because there are 3-4 or more kids with wonder stats, ECs, etc. for every spot). Essays may be even more important at a low admit rate, because there are so many great applicants and if you don’t really stand out, they all blend together after a while.
My kids spent tons of time on essays. It was absolutely the linchpin for their apps, and we were told so by admissions officers from multiple schools after the fact.
I know that you want to make it better for your baby, but as they age we learn the hard way that we can’t always fix things for them. Sometimes the college process is the first time a kid has been rejected AND the first time the parent has not been able to swoop in and fix something. We feel helpless that these nameless people have our precious child’s life in their arbitrary hands.
At this point, start getting him excited about Carleton if that is where he decides to go. Go online and buy a sweatshirt and some other trinket with the school logo and surprise him with it. Send him to their admitted students days, even if it may be a financial stretch for you.
Seventeen year olds are still very much children. I remember when my star volleyball player did not make the club team at Yale. She was devastated and I had to deal with long distance tears, complaints that she had made the wrong school choice, etc. A few days later she did get accepted into an EC that she wanted that was totally out of her comfort zone. That was one happy phone call.
This is all to say to you that we have all been there and feel your pain. But it will pass. He’ll be happy wherever he ends up.
Carleton is a great school. Did he apply EA to Chicago? There were huge differences in acceptance rates the year my kid got in there. It was a huge reach, but he applied EA, sent them a very quirky essay on the supplement and his “Why Chicago” essay started off with all the reasons he thought he didn’t belong there. I suspect they liked his sense of humor.
I know some of the small LACs real acceptance rates are much smaller than they appear to be once you subtract all the athletic recruits - their freshman classes are so small the teams put a real dent in them.
I think the straight arrow kids often have slightly disappointing results while the kids with slightly less stellar packages, but who manage to convey their personalities and potential often do a little better than expected. Our older son (Mr. Stellar stats) had a whole slew of rejections, some from schools less selective than the ones that accepted him, but he ended up with two great choices as well as merit money at two safeties. He ended up at a school that he would probably have rated fourth choice when he started the process, but it turned out to be a perfect fit for him.
I think it’s okay for a kid to feel disappointed. He didn’t do anything wrong. My older son’s essays were as good as he could write. My younger son’s essays were better than I knew he was capable of. They are who they are.
From one precocious child’s parent to another, the thing you may not be taking into account is maturity. My D had similar stats (35 ACT 790/770/750 SAT II’s 80 credit hours at university 4. GPA (unweighted) presidents list. competing at Debate Nationals, NMF,.on and on…She was very fortunate and accepted at most schools, yet, denied admission to Yale.
When I put myself in the shoes of any adcom the first thing I see in my daughters app is a 16/17 year old. I see less life experience, less foreign language, maybe I even see a bit of a wild card.
As a parent I see passion and commitment and growing maturity.
With precious few spots to fill in a class, a very young applicant had best convince the admissions committee that (s)he is socially and emotionally ready.
I also have to tell you this, the big hurdle for me was her NMF notification because, like you, we needed serious financial aid to give D a chance at a great education. Once I knew she would qualify for something like U of A honors college or any of the excellent NM programs I knew she’d have a chance. Everything after that is just gravy!.
We were blessed with an embarrassment of riches, having been accepted to all 6 of the top 25 LAC’s she applied to. but guess what, WE HAVE TO PICK ONE. and they are all great. she’d have been happy at Macalester or Bryn Mawr…Carleton is a great school. It’s time to celebrate. Would 7/7 have been nice? maybe, or maybe it’s just,like so many unanswered prayers, divine providence in action.
I am an Easterner in my late fifties. I first heard of Carleton when a girl in the class ahead of me at boarding school was accepted there, after disappointments from Dartmouth and Williams. She was a National Merit finalist, and widely considered the most cerebral in her class at our boarding school. So, she had results similar to the OP’s son more than forty years ago. I later found out that one of the most interesting, intellectual women I knew was a Carleton graduate, and her brainy, eccentric son went there later. I have always thought of it as a very intellectual school, therefore.
Pure speculation, but I think the financial aid issue looms larger at the smaller schools. Add that to the need to have college level athletes who are known to the coaches, and add some probabilities of attendance relating to geography if you are far away, and you probably have your answer. I’d guess that at Williams, at least half the applicants with a similar profile are not accepted. Possibly far more than that.
Its possible that some of the wait lists could be turned around with a phone call, but when you’re seeking substantial financial aid, that call is tougher to answer. It would be easier if it were a “If you’d admit me, I’d attend”, but you’re not in that position.