<p>so there is this one kid in our school who has anger management problems, and over the past year I was one of several kids who teased him (nothing terrible, but I still regret it). In the past maybe 3 months he totally snapped and seems to blame me for everything. He reported me to guidance at least twice and apparently some of his friends (who harbor major grudges against me for some other stuff that happened) have reported me as well. Now our vice principal is raging at me and threatening investigations and suspensions. He thinks I am still bothering this kid, even though I haven't even made eye contact in the past 2 weeks. What should I do? I have a great resume and I hope to make MIT or ivy league, so how much would a potential suspension jeopardize my application? ....omg please help...the stress of junior year is creating so much drama :((((</p>
<p>What a coincidence. I have the same problem.</p>
<p>Hire a lawyer?</p>
<p>no matter what it is, a suspension or academic misconduct is going to hurt your application. However, if that does happen, you should sent your colleges a letter explaining the action and what you learned from it and that you are sorry, etc.</p>
<p>chances are admins will completely disregard the event if it is really a BS story as you say.</p>
<p>i dont think i wanna hire a lawyer lol. I want to keep this as low key as possible. Hopefully my guidance counselor and teachers wont find out…</p>
<p>and its hard to prove that it is BS. i mean, how do i convince the colleges that this is largely due to a vendetta against me.</p>
<p>Nah I don’t think lawyer can even do anything in this case. Was kidding.</p>
<p>Just be as peaceful and compliant as possible. Apologize to the kid and try to make peace- this is by far the best solution, particularly if he’s got issues. If you do talk to the kid, don’t mention the trouble you might get into- just pretend like you genuinely want peace and make a genuine apology. </p>
<p>To admins, admin your past mistakes, emphasize that you’ve apologized, and insist that you’ve done nothing but try to improve the situation for the past few weeks (through avoiding him and the apology). Assure them that you will do whatever it takes to ensure there are no negative interactions.</p>
<p>Whatever you do, don’t try to fight the injustice. Don’t be arrogant, don’t act like you’re in the right (even if you are). Don’t complain or whine. It’ll just make you look worse. Compliance.</p>
<p>okay thanks, i’ll try to do that. Only problem is that this kid reports me if I even say hi to him. and my dbag vice principal plays mind games on me (saying that he has lots of anonymous sources) and insists that he doesn’t believe me. damn. hopefully i can somehow get through to them.</p>
<p>High school administrators at their finest!</p>
<p>does anyone know how a suspension for bullying would be compared to a suspension over academic integrity?</p>
<p>I’m not sure if a suspension for bullying would be better than for academic dishonesty or not. Obviously, academic dishonesty is a huge black mark for colleges, but so is bullying. Students have to get along, and bullying other students is not something colleges want to see.</p>
<p>If you have told the truth of it, I suggest you take a few steps. Go to the kid and apologize. Even if it was “minor” teasing and there were others, give him a serious apology and mean it. If he has anger problems, there is obviously some cause, whether it’s how other students treat him or (likely) problems at home you know nothing about. Apologize to him, even if he won’t accept it, and do it OUTSIDE of any dean’s office, so it seems like you actually mean it.</p>
<p>Go to your vice principal and tell him the truth of things. Say that while the teasing was minor, you regret it, and you hope the others do as well. Say you’ve had no contact over the past couple weeks, except for the apology.</p>
<p>If you really feel you’re being treated unfairly, go to your parents, but hopefully it won’t come to that.</p>
<p>But remember, you did bring this on yourself, even if it was more minor than what you’re being accused of.</p>
<p>Tell him to be quiet or it could get much worse.</p>
<p>lol, Analgin. . . .</p>
<p>Have you suggested having a meeting with both the kid and an admin? My high schools all had mediation volunteers for this sort of thing.</p>
<p>And I really doubt they can suspend you based on “anon sources.” I mean, if a teacher witnessed something, that would be another story. But, if it’s him and his friends over and over with no proof, I wonder what could really happen?</p>
<p>And, have you talked to your own parents about it? I know a couple parents who would have gone down to the school themselves if their kid was in your position. Admins have a harder time working up the gall to “play mind games” with parents. That’s when lawyers actually do start showing up.</p>
<p>^^If this is a private school, a lawyer won’t help much and the admin is used to dealing with parents. They are exceedingly strict and will take reports from students. One of my son’s friends was actually separated (had to stay home from school for a semester) from the school for reportedly pushing and verbally threatening another student. This is a New England Boarding School and the standards are high with fierce repercussions for any breaches. Not sure if the OP’s school is like this.</p>
<p>Hold on a minute here. By your own admission, you were part of a group of kids who teased a kid up to the point that he totally snapped and apparently your only regret is that this might hurt your admissions prospects at elite colleges. </p>
<p>You engaged in bullying. Rather than accepting responsibility for your actions, you are blaming the both the victim of your bullying and your dbag vice principal who you accuse of having a vendetta against you because he is threatening to investigate the allegations.</p>
<p>Bullying is serious stuff, and being caught doing it will impact your future. Your vice principal is doing the right thing by taking the accusations seriously. There should be an investigation and, if warranted, there should be suspensions.</p>
<p>Colleges dont want mean people on their campuses, and they dont look favorably on remorseless bullies.</p>
<p>Man up.</p>
<p>^ ^ ^…what Sherpa said!</p>
<p>LOL. You ganged up on the guy with your friends for a while, and now you can’t comprehend why he dislikes you? A vendetta against you! He must’ve thought you had a vendetta against him… What goes around comes around, you know?</p>
<p>No worries, I know plenty of fast talking people and you seem like one of them. You’ll probably be able to wheedle your way out of it, or at least minimize it on your app.</p>
<p>OP -</p>
<p>If you truly want this situation to cause you no more trouble, sit down with your school counselor and ask exactly what you need to do (and what you need to not do) for the rest of this year. If you can’t be in the same classroom/hallway/lunchroom/athletic field as the student that you have this problem with, so be it. Stay away.</p>
<p>You need to become totally apologetic. Talk to the administration and apologize. Ask if it is appropriate for you to apologize to the individual, or if it is better to have no further contact. Offer to take on an anti-bullying initiative at your school, or to attend some kind of class to learn about how to avoid being a bully in the future.</p>
<p>This might all sound stupid, but do it. If your principal thinks that you don’t seem sorry, then he’ll take further action(like a suspension) so that you do end up feeling sorry and regretful. So being sorry is in your best interest.</p>
<p>You brought this on yourself by bullying the kid in the first place.</p>
<p>A suspension for bullying will seriously harm your application to any college - and rightfully so.</p>
<p>Instead of pretending that the allegations are BS even though you admit to bullying the other student in the past and even though it seems to have caused someone to “snap,” own up to your actions, apologize to the other student (and anyone else you’ve bullied), and apologize to the administration.</p>