<p>Previous College:</p>
<p>SUNY Plattsburgh
A small SUNY school in the heart of Plattsburgh, NY, a small north country town on Lake Champlain about 20 minutes away from the border (and a really “awesome” bar called The Rocket, where you can get some coke with that Molson). Nearly every student enrolled, except for the copious amounts of Japanese exchange students, had Plattsburgh as about number six on their list of schools they wished to attend. Then, they either got lazy or didn’t get into any other school they applied to. So they came to Plattsburgh State University becuase if you could write your name on the application you were in. This led to the massive influx of freshmen in the fall of 06, leading to really lame parties and no parking spaces for anyone. In past years, it was actually really fun. Then all the fun people left. Over the years, it has gotten progressively lamer. When students get really bored of the lameness, they take a trip to Montreal and realize how ****ty their life is. This is usually compensated for by heavily drinking at least 5 days out of the week and smoking ones self stupid, then going downtown to get Pizza Bonos. Homework is rarely done, not because of laziness, but because this is Plattsburgh.</p>
<p>for some reason, the administrators changed the name to Plattsburgh State University College in 05. why the repetativeness? no one knows.</p>
<p>One of the qualities a Plattsburgh State student must have is a deep, penetrating hatred for ones self and a want to either jump off of the Kehoe administration building with a group of friends or drown themselves in the the Hawkins Pond. There is actually a facebook group devoted to this sentiment. If you go to Plattsburgh, you are probably a member.
Another is a drive to become the best semi-functioning alcoholic/stoner they can be.</p>
<p>Most students say they are going to transfer next semester. They want to see if they’ll hate themselves as much somewhere else. They will. This transfer to another school rarely happens, and if it does, that person is our life-long idol.</p>
<p>If you go here, you know and love poutine.*
Hey, what do you want to do on this fine, freezing cold August day at Plattsburgh State University ?</p>
<p>I want to drink my face off, try not to kill myself, and smoke myself ■■■■■■■■!</p>
<p>Awesome! me too!</p>
<p>Sweet! then we can go to Pizza Bonos, drink more downtown, then go jump in Lake Champlain and hope that Champy gets us before hypothermia!</p>
<p>*
Current College:</p>
<p>Fordham University</p>
<p>Probably the hardest yet smartest college on the eastern seaboard. Bodegas rule the streets along with people selling bottleg movies, northface jackets, and drugs. Overall though, on some real fordham will dead you.
*
Yo what happened to my northface?</p>
<p>That ***t got ran and sold at half price on fordham road
*</p>
<p>College as of the fall: (third transfer is always a charm)</p>
<p>Columbia</p>
<p>The fifth oldest school in the United States, and a member of the prestigious Ivy League. Columbia University was founded in 1754 as King’s College, and the university has switched locations three times within the island of Manhattan. Although Columbia was founded as a loyalist university, Alexander Hamilton, a Columbia alum, helped keep the university going after the Revolution, alongside his fellow Columbian, John Jay.</p>
<p>Columbia is currently located in the Morningside Heights Neighborhood of Manhattan, near Harlem. However, the school has completely gentrified the area, and the neighborhood has become as overpriced as the rest of New York. The University is also the largest private landowner in New York City, along with the Catholic Church, and the endowment is one of the largest in the nation. Tuition for undergrads averages to about $50,000 per year, and graduate tuition tends to be even higher.</p>
<p>The University’s journalism school issues the Pulitzer Prize every year, and Columbia University professors and alums lay claim to the invention of FM radio, the early stages of the Manhattan Project, and a number of other advances. Furthermore, Columbia lays claim to more Nobel Prize winning affiliates than any other university in the world.</p>
<p>Undergraduate colleges include Columbia College and the School of Engineering and Applied Sciences. Columbia is also affiliated with the Seven Sisters school, Barnard College; however, most Columbia students do not refer to Barnard girls as Columbians, and undergrads from the two schools often hate that Barnard girls think they go to Columbia. Barnard degrees are certified by Columbia, and the schools’ respective students often argue and complain about Barnard’s relationship.</p>
<p>Columbia College’s acceptance rate usually hovers below 9%, making the school one of the most exclusive universities in the world. Columbia students are usually left in the political arena, and the school is regarded as one of the most liberal ivies; however, most students at Columbia are usually spoiled rich kids. In contrast to other ivies, many Columbia students solely apply to Columbia, instead of applying to all of the ivies. Many students are lured to the school by the appeal of living in New York City.</p>
<p>Columbia’s other schools include the prestigious Columbia law school, Teacher’s College, and the School of Physicians and Surgeons. All Columbia graduate programs are ranked within the top 10 in the country, and the schools are incredibly difficult to get into.</p>
<p>Columbia alums include Barack Obama, Alexander Hamilton, Robert Livingston, Jack Kerouac, Theodore Roosevelt, Lou Gherig, Madeleine Albright, Eric Holder, Warren Buffett, Spiderman and many other world leaders in business, politics, medicine, and all other disciplines.
*
Guy 1: Isn’t Columbia University the only Ivy in New York?
Columbian: Well, there is Cornell.
Guy 1: Like I said, isn’t Columbia the only Ivy in New York?
*</p>