<p>In doing research on this subject, I came upon a piece written by the woman who heads Andover. She gave a historical view and a present day view of the "elite" schools. Certainly theses schools were tied to the very wealthiest of families for generations just as the ivy league schools were. It seems like the boarding schools have evolved in the same way. The best of these schools seem to have a make up identical to that of an ivy college in terms of racial diversity, percent of students on financial aid, committment to certain profiles and so on. Also, I am just amazed at what type of grades and scores these schools require, also mirroring the ivies. Thus, I tend to believe what all of the families I've been talking to at length are telling me: The kids are so bright and engaged in the program that there's much less of the high school clique stuff and overall social nonsense. So I would expect the snob content to mirror that of an ivy. Of course you'll find some, but these kids seem to have bigger goals than obtaining the latest seven jeans as is the deal at my daughter's current prep, the mentality we would like to live without.</p>
<p>thought John Kerry graduated from exeter not st. paul.</p>
<p>I agree KIRMUM. But if you have a child with this mentality..that you don't need all the latest jeans to FIT in, it doesn't matter what school you go to. My kids were all the same.....went to public high school and found their niche in highly selective colleges and I saved alot of money on the way so I could afford to sent them to the better colleges in the long run. Yes, I agree there are alot more of these kids in the "elite" private schools and perhaps there are less cliques, but there are also these types of kids in the highly selective colleges as well...it's just a matter of getting them in there with the least amount of emotional scarring that they could experience in the public high schools. I still believe that water seeks its own level no matter where they are!</p>
<p>I also wondered, as EK did, about the sensitivity being displayed here. It does seem that Kirmum's daughter would ebenfit from such an experience because her current HS doesn't seem to be able replicate the experience in a day setting. Luckily, I have never encountered that problem with our local private schools and boarding school isn't needed (but after reading some of the posts, I can understand why some feel forced into it based on their environment). I cringed when I read that her daughter's school is cliquey and kids are focused on attire - yuck.</p>
<p>However, Jazzpiano does seem to carry a very elitist tone (it takes a sophisticated community to congratulate a parent for this decision? As though anyone who doesn't isn't sophisticated...oh puhleeze). When I read that comment I thought "yep, that's why people still carry the notion that boarding schools turn out snobs - because of comments like that". Yuck again.</p>
<p>Momsdream, Jazz is the furthest thing from a snob. She's a brilliant young woman who could do anything and has chosen to devote her life to not for profit causes on a level beyond what I would have ever dreamed someone this age could accomplish. By sophisticated, in this case, I think she meant people with broad exposure. She certainly added to my "sophistication" on this topic through giving me exposure to herself and her friends. While most would call someone with my experiences sophisticated, I was certainly not where boarding schools are concerned.</p>
<p>P.S., what kind of school do your children attend? With four children who have experience some public schools and some privates, I have yet to meet the school not filled with cliques and designer clothes.</p>
<p>Kirmum, my children attend a Quaker School (Religious Society of Friends). There are some Quaker schools that have a move "designer" feel to them. Ours was once described in a in news article as being "so crunchy you can crack a tooth". Trust me: no cliques, no designer anything(unless you rip the tag off of the outside so nobody knows). This was a big issue is our home when son began 9th grade and told me that he could absolutely not wear anyting with a designer label to school. We learned to shop at Modell's (no name sweats). He has since graduated to more expensive clothing...but they still can't show any names. </p>
<p>Any other Friends School parents, chime in. I wouldn't have believed it without experiencing it first-hand.</p>
<p>Edit: I just don't get the intense drive to validate the B School experience. It's not for everyone - even some the most "exposed" families. But, the condescending tone towards those who disagree is such a turnoff. Why does the world need to be convinced?</p>
<p>The one good thing about The Boarding School From Hell which we experienced in Austin, TX was that the kids were VERY laid-back and there wasn't much of the designer-stuff. Austin is just a neat place. There were certainly other issues, and plenty of money around, but pick-up trucks were more statusy (is that an SAT word?) than BMWs.</p>
<p>Yeah, I never really thought that B Schools would be full of brats. I grew up with 2 girls in my area who attended B schools. Their families were't wealthy and they were nice girls......kind of on the quiet side when at home - well liked. I'm sure there are all kinds of kids there. After all, some of the wealthiest people I know are the biggest "rebels" who would never let on that they have more than anyone else....so even those with money don't always have to show it (or like to). The only problem I have with B Schools is the "boarding" part (lol)....sending kids away.....other than that, I bet the student body can look very much like students are day preps.</p>
<p>A quaker school, that makes sense! Sound like you truly found an unusual situation. I am not defending these schools, I haven't even set foot on one yet. However, it is clear to me that the misguided beliefs I had that these schools were the bastions of wealthy snobs is widespread and untrue. Whether or not they are for my child will hopefully be apparent when we visit.</p>
<p>Chelsea Clinton attended a Quaker school..</p>
<p>Yes, Chelsea attended Sidewell Friends School...which my cousins currently attend in the DC area......it is much more of a "designer label" Quaker school....but Quaker, nonetheless. I'm hooked the Quaker schools.....but don't think any less of other choices.</p>
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was once described in a in news article as being "so crunchy you can crack a tooth"
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A local day school which is very competitve and expensive yet was almost Luddite in its refusal to update their computer lab, could be described this way. The building is a historic landmark and part of the students responsibilty is building upkeep. Homecooked meals are also part of the school program and included in tuition ( a big plus from my side- my daughter has never attended a K-12 school that really had a lunch program ). The student body or at least the parents could be described as very organic. My daughter was interested but not enough and attended a school a few blocks away which actually split off from the original school. I was still curious especially after I learned that two members from my all time favorite rock band attended and fund 4 new students each year till graduation ( 6-12th- wow at $20,000 for 7 years that would add up!) My youngest was more interested and attends summer programs there but opted to attend a public school in same general area. Interestingly her public school gets lots of kids who attend private k-8 but then bail and attend public for high school, mostly cause they want a larger environment, I have the impression.
Their parents generally go along with it, but if you catch them when they don't think you are looking, they have a "we are not amused" look on their face. They have spent years convincing themselves that private schools were worth all that money, but now they aren't quite sure! ;)</p>