<p>Let your son decide..I did what my parents told me to do..what happened?i'm 23 years old and starting from zero again..i drop out from a prestigious eng. university in my home country.I did because i couldn't take it anymore..i listened to my parents instead of my heart..
One thing that i agree is that a girl should never be a reson for anything..too many beautiful girls in college..he will always find one he likes...</p>
<p>Just adding something..I see people saying Princeton is hard..I don't wanna be rude but american High school is a joke..getting A's is very easy...just because a student has perfect GPA at HS doesn't mean the he will get good great at a good university..I have a friend who was top 5% of his clas perfect gpa and went to a top 20 university and enf up getting C's D's...
I would take 6 months off because once college life hit him he better be prepared.</p>
<p>Princeton just is not "eat-your-young". It's hard, but it's not brutal. Not even close.</p>
<p>However, it is quite possible that stars in high school are just average at Princeton. My D was a high school math star. She got to Princeton, placed into a 200-level class, and was surprised. </p>
<p>Her take? She wasn't going to be the best molecular biologist or mathematician out there. But she's loving neuroscience....and providing value as someone who bridges the quantitative and qualitative worlds for behavioral studies.</p>
<p>But the school itself? Boy, I wish people were half as nice to me day to day as that school is to my kid....</p>
<p>Don't let your son choose UM for a girl. But, if he is telling you he needs time off, Princeton announced a new program to support this. Maybe that will solve both of your requirements.</p>
<p>I agree with Alumother and UCLA, PhD. I am sorry I agree that parents give up way too much control in this process (and in a lot of other things in this country). The Iraq reference is sooooo true. Perspective.</p>
<p>I think parents should have more control if they're the ones paying the extra 10K or whatever, but when money isn't an issue like this... I don't know.</p>
<p>Relampago! Both of us have Spanish word names! Although I admit, yours is better and people are probably less likely to pronounce it oddly. Usually people pronounce the ll as an l and it reminds me of that brillo sponge.</p>
<p>Brillar---HAHA. Yeah I get that with my real name! Well not brillo sponge, but it is butchered nonetheless.</p>
<p>If I'm reading this right, the OP's son met a girl on campus at Michigan recently and decided he liked her.</p>
<p>I think that conversations about these types of things can be very difficult between parent/child (when you say things like "you barely know her" and "you can't make a decision based on a relationship that might end as quickly as it began" inevitably kids shut their ears or tell you you don't understand what it's like).</p>
<p>I guess I would say the following to your son:</p>
<ol>
<li><p>You have two good choices. In my judgment, Princeton offers a better more personalized academic experience with a more diverse student boy--Michigan is 71% white with 68% of the students coming from in-state, while Princeton is 61% white and is much more geographically diverse. Also, because Princeton is much smaller, you will not find it as hard to get courses you want, find a crowd to hang out with and get more attention from professors.</p></li>
<li><p>Personally, I don't think that deciding on the basis of a GF is a good idea, because relationships can end and then you might feel you made a mistake.</p></li>
<li><p>While this might seem crass, Princeton probably has more prestige overall and will provide you with unparalled alumni connections.</p></li>
<li><p>Since Princeton doesn't allow transfers, if you decline acceptance you will not have the option to change your mind and go there. However, in the event that you choose Princeton and are unhappy, you will still have the option to transfer to University of Michigan.</p></li>
<li><p>The point about burnout is important. However, I doubt that Michigan will be easy. Maybe we should discuss taking a year off if you feel you need it. </p></li>
</ol>
<p>I would probably make those points, but ultimately, University of Michigan is a great school and you might not be able to convince your son that your views are correct.</p>
<p>I am surprised at some of the posts on this thread. You'd think the boy was chosing some second rate university over Princeton. This is Michigan you are talking about. I seriously doubt the OP's son is leaning toward Michigan because of a girl he met. More likely, he thinks Michigan is a better fit for him. Academically and reputationally, Princeton happens to be one of the 5 universities in the US that is considered slightly stronger than Michigan, but not in some key disciplines, such as Engineering and Business (which Princeton doesn't offer). </p>
<p>I have known several students who have turned down one of those five universities in favor of Michigan, and it was almost always because they thought they would be happier in Ann Arbor. With very few exceptions, they did not regret their decisions. And why shouldn't they? Michigan is generally considered among the top 10 or top 15 universities in the nation, so it's not like they sacrificed a great deal. Michigan has shaped American education as much as any university. Two of MIT's last four presidents (Charles Vest from 1991-2004 and Jerome Wiesner from 1970-1980) were hired from Michigan. Columbia's current president, Lee Bollinger and Princeton's ex president, Harold Shapiro (1988-2001), were also hired from the University of Michigan. Six of Cornell's 13 presidents, including its co-founder (Andrew Dickson White) and two of its last four presidents were hired from Michigan. There is a reason why top universities recruit administrators from Michigan and promote them to their highest posts. The University always stood as an ideal of higher education. Gerhard Casper, a Yale educated scholar and President of Stanford University had this to say about Michigan.</p>
<p>"I am extremely skeptical that the quality of a university - any more than the quality of a magazine - can be measured statistically. However, even if it can, the producers of the U.S. News rankings remain far from discovering the method. Let me offer as prima facie evidence two great public universities: the University of Michigan-Ann Arbor and the University of California-Berkeley. These clearly are among the very best universities in America - one could make a strong argument for either in the top half-dozen. Yet, in the last three years, the U.S. News formula has assigned them ranks that lead many readers to infer that they are second rate: Michigan 21-24-24, and Berkeley 23-26-27."</p>
<p>Criticism</a> of College Rankings - September 23, 1996</p>
<p>President Capser's use Cal and Michigan as the crux, or as he put it, "prima facie evidence" , of his argument is indication enough of where those universities stand, at least in the eyes of the academic community.</p>
<p>I think it is important to realize just how good Michigan is. The OP has obviously accepted that Princeton is a great university. Perhaps it is time he gave Michigan a fair chance. That is not to say that he should make sure his son is chosing the right school for the right reasons. I would probably chose Princeton over Michigan myself, even if I think I would have been happier at Michigan. But if his decision to attend Michigan stands, he will still have an unbeatable experience.</p>
<p>Regarding alumni connections: I'm not sure Princeton has a large advantage. Per capita, no doubt... but Michigan graduates 4-5 timeas as many both undergrad and grad. The volume of Michigan alumni likely balances the higher prestige of the Princeton alum.</p>
<p>As I mentioned earlier, one really must look at the specific area of study. For Engineering, Michigan is top 5 both undergrad and for Ph.D....</p>
<p>Michigan is as geographically diverse as any school in the nation. There are definitely more people from other parts of the country/world at Michigan then there are with the entire student body at Princeton.</p>
<p>That's because it's a larger school. The reasons the OP is stating for preferring Michigan don't make any sense at all. Basically, he met a girl on campus recently and doesn't want to be away from her? Also, he wants to slack off?</p>
<p>He needs to grow up. I can understand if your son loved Michigan football or something. That's actually a valid reason to some. As the dad, it's important that you advise him to go to Princeton. He needs the school more than you think. At a state school, it's easy to lose motivation in work, play videogames all day and chase a girl around. At Princeton, his passion for learning will reemerge again as he is surrounded by brilliant scholars all around him. He will forget this girl and marry some Princeton girl. Most Princeton grads end up inter-marrying anyway.</p>
<p>You need to talk to your son pronto. Don't let him make a big mistake.</p>
<p>
[quote]
Also, because Princeton is much smaller, you will not find it as hard to get courses you want, find a crowd to hang out with
[/quote]
I've never heard any complaints from Michigan students about not getting into courses they want. On the other hand, a Princeton student may not have any many variety of courses to choose from.</p>
<p>About your second point. How is it easier to find a crowd to hang out with at a smaller school?</p>
<p>
[quote]
Princeton ... will provide you with unparalled alumni connections.
[/quote]
Princeton is less than a fifth of the size of Michigan. Frankly, I've never met more than a handful Princeton grads in my entire career.</p>
<p>
[quote]
I doubt that Michigan will be easy.
[/quote]
It's not easy to get A's at Michigan. However, one can easily cruise along for 4 years as a C+/B- student in Ann Arbor... and there are plenty of activities to keep you occupied, both on and off campus. This is precisely the problem with the OP.</p>
<p>
[quote]
At a state school, it's easy to lose motivation in work, play videogames all day and chase a girl around.
[/quote]
Yeaaah, Michigan's "state school" environment for sure leads someone to that outcome...</p>
<p>EAD, Michigan/Ann Arbor inspire learning. It is generally regarded to be one of the most intellectual settings in the country. Besides, slacking off isn't an option at a school of Michigan's calibre. The faculty, wich is ranked among the top 5 in the nation, has pretty high standards.</p>
<p>Michigan is great but it is not Princeton, plus I am sorry but the kid's logic is skewed. Plus, I agree with the notion that it is not just about the kid, it is about family too.</p>
<p>If it is your goal to send your son to Princeton, why not offer to fly him to Ann Arbor 3-4 times during the year (and keep your promise.) Tell him his GF can come for Christmas (or Winter Break if your family does not celebrate Christmas) Tell him you understand how much he cares about her and that you will do everything (pay for unlimited texts?) to be sure that if they want to be in contact they can be. Really support him by enabling him to see that choosing Princeton is not choosing against his GF.....remember being in love for the first time? That said, he will likely be equally successful at these two wonderful institutions. Ann Arbor is pretty awesome. Princeton is terrific.</p>
<p>Relampago, Michigan is not Princeton, but then again, Princeton is not Michigan. All in all, both are exceptional institutions, with Princeton edging Michigan out by the smallest of margins.</p>
<p>And how do you know that the kid's logic is skewed? Did you actually talk to him? We have very little information to go on. I think a person who is good enough to get a full ride at Michigan and get into Princeton is probably going to be pretty rational.</p>
<p>Princeton is hardly small.</p>
<p>When you have over 1000 kids in your freshman class, you have A LOT of people to get to know.</p>
<p>You will go four years and in no way know everyone on campus, not even in your class. You will not begin to feel it is small.</p>
<p>Alex,
The margin between Princeton and U Michigan is not close. U Michigan is one of the top five public universities in the country. Princeton is one of the top five colleges on the planet. </p>
<p>The only circumstances where I could see a student picking U Michigan over Princeton would be 1) a sizable cost difference for some reason; 2) some department that U Michigan offered that Princeton did not; 3) some kid who really liked college football; or 4) some kid who was following a bf/gf to college (and I think we'd agree that this is a pretty flimsy reason).</p>
<p>I'd be happy to provide lots of detailed comparisons if you like, but please give the Princeton-U Michigan equivalence commentary a rest. It insults our intelligence.</p>
<p>What a surprise to see hawkette here. According to him/her no public university is equivalent or better than any decent private school.</p>