I am trying to gain a better understanding of the ins and outs of sorority life for my daughter. If she attends Alabama, she and I would both like for her to rush a sorority. I have heard some excellent things about sororities and some rather disturbing things. I’d like to hear from anyone with firsthand experience (either yours or your child’s). What is/was sorority life like for you? Was it a worthwhile investment to the college experience? What were the benefits? What were the downsides? Did you/will you graduate on time? Was your GPA affected either positively or negatively? How are you different as a person because of this experience?
Thank you kindly for any feedback.
I was a member of a sorority during my time as a student as was my daughter, so you’re going to hear “pros” from me! which brings up the major CON - the cost. Those big wonderful houses cost money to operate, and the parents provide it. Even if you don’t live in the house, the cost is high. It DOES include all meals, Monday breakfast through Friday lunch. There are a couple of ways ot cut back on the cost a little - don’t order every single T shirt offered nor every Zaps photo (photos shot at events by Zap Photo and offered for sale at the house). The first year is slightly more expensive due to pledging fees, initiation fees, the cost of a badge, house corporation dues. Those don’t repeat.
As with anything other activity, you get out what you put in. If you are involved in things the house does together, you will probably benefit from the friendships and connections. For me, I learned a LOT serving as an officer - planning and executing projects, how to persuade others to your point of view, even paying a mortgage and paying payroll taxes. My daughter had a boyfriend and two jobs and a demanding major, so she never served as even a committee head. I’m an introvert, so I valued and needed the friendships I found there. She’s an extrovert, so she had plenty of friends outside the sorority. there were a couple of other girls in my major that I could get help from - same for her. Back in my day we had sit-down dinners and learned all kinds of manners and etiquette; not so much for today’s kids with buffet dinners because of the number of members.
It does take time! Members usually learn how to budget and use their time wisely. Good grades are encouraged through study halls (required for new members) to help you establish good study habits. Often sororities will host a speaker of interest. Working with alumnae advisors exposes you to great women leaders and examples. Hazing is NOT done at UA. All the sororities agree on this and are swift to deal with sorority members who try to haze.
Have you visited campus yet? If not, you can request a tour of a sorority house or two by a “Greek ambassador” - a sorority member who will be happy to answer your questions.
Keep in mind that, despite the imposing houses, only 1/3 of the student body is Greek. She will likely have many friends outside of Greek houses as inside. That number is more like 1/2 of all freshman women, but by sophomore year, it’s a more normal 1/3.
Sorority life is NOT for everyone, but it can be an invaluable part of the college experience for those it’s for.
@Southlander
Thank you so much for sharing your experience as well as your D’s.
I have the estimated cost (depending on sorority) at $6300/yr for the 1st year. Do you have an idea based on that number of what sophomore-senior year might cost? Did you or your D live in the house? If so, how was that experience? Do you have an idea of how much the dues go up if you are in house? For freshman, do you recommend living in Tutwiler? Our UA tour guide said she lived there as a freshman because it’s close to the sororities and a lot of other Greek girls were there. Were you or your D in the honors program too? If so, do you feel like it was easy to manage both social life and academics?
Thank you for the advice about requesting a Greek Ambassador. If we make another visit, I will try to coordinate with someone at the university to set this up in advance.
My daughter is in her second year at UA and in a sorority. We are a middle class family, so the financial obligation has not been easy for us. She has some scholarship money, so we are not paying full tuition. Has it been worth it? YES. She has made wonderful friends that are so supportive of her. None of the petty, jealous stuff from high school. Since most meals are included, I’m not sending grocery money. She lived in Tutwiler her first year. She was fortunate to live in the house this year and she has loved still being on campus. Meals are served at the house. She only moves her car two days a week when she goes to work. Several girls even walk to church together. She has bonded with her roommate and several girls on her hall. From a mom’s point of view, it is very secure. When you total the cost, living in the house is the same or cheaper than renting off campus. My daughter is very outgoing and would have been fine without rushing, but she is extremely happy with her sorority. I’ll also add that she is in the honors college with a demanding major, works part-time (got the job through a sorority connection), and has a boyfriend that is not in a fraternity. Hope that helps! Roll Tide!!
@elliesmom
Thank you for sharing your D’s experience! This was very helpful.
Did you or your D live in the house? If so, how was that experience? Do you have an idea of how much the dues go up if you are in house? For freshman, do you recommend living in Tutwiler? Our UA tour guide said she lived there as a freshman because it’s close to the sororities and a lot of other Greek girls were there. Were you or your D in the honors program too? If so, do you feel like it was easy to manage both social life and academics?
To answer your questions…that sounds about right. The cost is way different from when my daughter was there 2001-2005 because of the changes to housing. I’d say it’s most cost effective if you’re living in the house. The rent is comparable or lower than apartment or dorm. The other costs are going to be about the same. It’s more when you’re out because you do have some house maintenance fees in addition to your dorm/apartment and all the other stuff.
I live in Martha Parham, but my daughter lived in Tutwiler. Frankly, I preferred Martha Parham. The room sizes were almost identical to Tutwiler but you didn’t have to wait forever for an elevator and only a few floors to deal with during those lovely midnight fire drills.
Neither my daughter nor I had any trouble handling both academics and social, but neither of us were in college honors. They didn’t exist when I was in school! I had one part-time job at various times every year except freshman year; she worked up to three part-time jobs. She was paying for her cell phone bill and gas; I had no cell phone and only had a car my senior year!