<p>Wow…I can’t imagine being that mom. I don’t know about everyone else, but we all have hopes and dreams for our kids as well as ourselves and their reality just experienced major change. All that shopping for dorm room stuff, all the planning and I am just so surprised that it was never communicated that this was a problem. Certainly College X notified student that he was in trouble. Makes me think student hid coorespondence from school in an attempt to “make it all go away.” It boils down to maturity, but I sure feel for this childs parents.</p>
<p>OPs sis needs to find out if the kid is on probation or if he’s “out.” Either way, a big pause here as to the kid’s ability to knuckle down in college is probably why “mom” is bringing the kiddo home. Senior slump is senior slump but generally we’re talking A to B or B to C maybe an A to a C…not Fs from a student taking an AP class or two. My S2 got a C in a senior art class…his only C ever. Just blew off a project or two senior spring out of 10 required projects. Oh my. Hugs to the entire family, I would be absolutely freaked out. If our high school didn’t mail a final transcript (like they do) I doubt I’d go “on-line” to see my graduating son’s scores. I’d figure it was all over and be moving forward as the OP’s sis seems to have been doing. I do agree, the kid knew he was in deep doo-doo gradewise but probably figured it didn’t matter.</p>
<p>I know in college, being over 18, you have to sign to have your grades revealed to your parents by the university…I’m not sure how it works in high school though, as I wasn’t 18 until a few weeks prior to graduation. I hope everything works out.</p>
<p>Even if his high school doesn’t mail report cards, and just posts grades online, I can’t imagine parents not insisting on seeing high school grades. Here, parents even have to sign progress reports (though that can be forged, parents know these exist and can insist on seeing them). Further, it would be odd for the high school to not send any notification if the student didn’t earn his diploma (can’t tell if he earned it or not). </p>
<p>It is unclear if the college has rescinded the offer of admission OR if the student is on probation (as stated), what that means…stay a semester and get a certain GPA in order to stay at this school, or take a semester off. If the latter, what does he have to do in order to matriculate? Does he need to retake any HS courses or even earn his diploma?</p>
<p>I suppose all that will be explained when you hear from them. </p>
<p>I can’t imagine that the kid didn’t at least know he was doing poorly. And there has to be some method of his having found out final year grades, even if the school posts them online and not via snail mail. If parents didn’t ask to see these, the kid could have kept quiet thinking it was behind him. </p>
<p>I feel sorry for the parents here. Still not sure how they would not have known their son’s final senior grades. It is something parents really should be aware of for any kid, at least prior to college years.</p>
<p>Since he is home, it sounds like admission was rescinded. What a terrible thing to find out at the nth hour.</p>
<p>Wow… I am only a junior, but reading this story is truly a wake-up call that I cannot slack off in senior year. Best of luck to the OP and her nephew, because I know this must a really harsh blow =/</p>
<p>GTAlum: While it does sound like admissions is rescinded, the OP stated he is on “Probation.” It would help to understand what Probation means and what it entails.</p>
<p>I’m also curious how this went down while on campus. I imagine he was assigned a dorm/room. I wonder how he came to know he was on “probation” or not going to be enrolled, once he got there. When we dropped our kids off, we unpacked them and set up the room and left. There was no communications with other offices during that period of time.</p>
<p>Something just doesn’t add up.</p>
<p>Colleges don’t usually allow you to register for classes until they give you clearance. You don’t get clearance unless all the holds are off from the admissions, financial aid and business office.</p>
<p>For a new student, transcripts are usually required to be sent to college by mid-July.</p>
<p>Maybe he knew about it but was in complete denial and not admitting the reality of the situation to his parents or himself until they were actually at the school???</p>
<p>The school may have said he’s on probation but not sent him home; his parents might have decided that given this turn of events, they weren’t paying for fall semester and turned around for home.</p>
<p>CountingDown, that is another plausible scenario. Maybe the OP will update after talking to her sister.</p>
<p>I don’t understand those(few) that think it is someone else’s job to alert the parents that the student isn’t doing well in high school.
I thought that the responsibility fell on the parent to be aware how the child is doing. Am I wrong?
Of course a child would withhold bad grades in keeping with “teen magic thinking” as was said earlier, but if parent sees bad grades or no grades they should know to look into it. As adults who have “been there, done that” we know if a kid is holding his hands behind his back, we should ask/look “what’s there?”
None so blind as those who will not see.
Please don’t let parents get away with the idea that it was the school’s job to alert parents of kid’s poor grades. It is parents job to know.</p>
<p>I’m also wondering why, if this school is in their own state (could be a large state!), and if the mom left three days ago to take her son to move him in for orientation, why she was still there three days later (unless the drive is very far). </p>
<p>When taking our kids to college, one of which was four hours away and one of which was six hours away. We did have to spend the night there, but once we moved them in and set up the room, we headed back home. The orientation was for the kids.</p>
<p>I agree with younghoss that a parent of a high school student should be aware of the students’ grades…both mid marking period (progress reports) and especially final marking period or semester grades. If it is not sent by snail mail, I can’t imagine as a parent, not checking online or finding out my kids’ school grades.</p>
<p>I was simply stating that I’m not sure if a parent can call up the school in HS to access grades if their child is 18 already and hasn’t signed anything giving the school permission to release their grades to anyone but themselves. I wasn’t 18 long enough in HS for it to come up as an issue.</p>
<p>XU2011…this doesn’t sound like an issue over the kid being 18 though. </p>
<p>The parents should have either seen the grades online or if they didn’t have access to that, then ask their kid to give them a copy of his grades/transcript/report card. I suppose you could claim that if the kid is 18 and doesn’t release permission for parents to access his grade report, they can’t get it. However, parents can demand to see their child’s high school grades from their child directly. Simple…“Johnny, we need to see your report card. If we don’t, we don’t pay or send you to college.” But there is no indication here that the parents wanted to see the final year grades but that the kid did not grant them access. Sounds like the parents were not aware of their child’s grades which for me, is odd for parents of kids in grades K-12 to not know or desire to find out.</p>
<p>In other words, by July, the parents should have known their child’s final senior grades. Upon seeing an F and 2 Ds, they should have talked to the high school and also the college to find out if the student’s status for college was unchanged. They should have seen the grades and upon seeing them, looked into if this was going to be a problem. It all started by not knowing his grades, it appears. </p>
<p>Again, the OP may know more soon and share. Lessons could be learned from this person’s experience.</p>
<p>Some colleges are offering and encouraging families to be part of welcome weeks where the families have orientation activities, as well as the students.</p>
<p>It’s also possible that mom and dad brought child to college and then decided to make a week or weekend out of the trip in the area. I know we did when we dropped our first son off at college. </p>
<p>One incoming freshman I know had placement tests earlier than orientation - she wanted to be guaranteed priority registration for her major - and went to college a full week ahead of orientation. Mom went with her. There was no dorm to stay in, so she would have to stay in a hotel for those days before the sessions began and she could move in. (I couldn’t understand why placement tests would be so ill-timed - they must be catering to those that live in the area!)</p>
<p>OP here–family isn’t talking BUT some pieces of the puzzle are coming together, thanks to my son who is getting info from the family grapevine… </p>
<p>In February 2009 nephew was accepted at State U with the conditions 1) he enroll at state U for summer school (2 classes) to see if he could handle the work and 2) his final grades from high school be acceptable.</p>
<p>So nephew did go to summer school at the U, took his two classes and got C’s in both. Returned home last week (4 hour drive) then returned back to State U this Tuesday, with mom (my sis) helping him move into another dorm.</p>
<p>What happened next is that there was some kind of problem–“transcript issues” is what I am hearing–and my sis had to drive back up to State U this morning because son is on probation. The two of them came home this afternoon. </p>
<p>No word about grades or anything, but for a fact I know nephew was confiding to son on grad night that he had failed a couple of classes at mid-term and he was sure he was getting 2 Ds and his English grade was in jeopardy as he had an F in English at March mid-term; he thought he would get a D in English (3 Ds, total).</p>
<p>While I would have done the exact same thing (he had the summer classes to prove his committment and he did not), it’s still heartwrench. I really feel for this family.</p>