Read My Essay (Please :))

Many students decide to apply to Emory based on our size, location, reputation, and yes, the weather. Besides these valid reasons to choose Emory as a possible college choice, why is this university a particularly good match for you?

<pre><code> I’ve been interested in medicine for as long as I can remember, and have enjoyed helping people my entire life. I can’t think of a better place to pursue medicine than Emory. I plan to major in biology. That said, I understand the rigors of an Emory pre-med curriculum and the dedication and discipline a person needs to succeed here.

I know that Emory receives more funding for research than any other school in Georgia, and this reflects in the countless opportunities Emory has to offer. In particular, the Robert W. Woodruff Health Sciences Center stimulates my interest in human health and advancement. A subsection of the center, the Yerkes National Primate Research Center, focuses on human health by comparing human’s anatomy to primates. One of the research programs is involved with vision disorders, but the question has to be asked what spawns these disorders. Is good eyesight a function of nature or nurture? Questions like this and more are asked and solved over and over again. The Carter Center, Center of Ethics (Another reason why Emory is a good match for me), Centers for Disease Control, and the American Cancer Society are all positioned just minutes away from the campus. This list is only the beginning of what Emory has to offer.

From people that I know and trust, I know that Emory cares deeply about its students, individually and collectively. The opportunities Emory provides its students are innumerable and Atlanta is also a great place to begin working. The combination between a small and strong liberal arts curriculum and a leading national research institution makes me feel that I will not be treated as some number or statistic, while I am focusing on my education. Another thing that I notice is that though academics are tough at Emory, the students aren’t cutthroat. Perhaps this air of acceptance and self-motivation is the reason why so many Emory students go on to graduate school.

Though I realize people may want to apply to Emory University solely on its reputation and even its rankings, I picked Emory as my top choice because of the overall package. The countless opportunities for volunteer work, research, shadowing is one aspect of Emory that I respect and admire. The diversity at a small school coupled with the many organizations gives me the chance to express my interests. Finally, the academics at Emory are challenging but not cutthroat. I believe in Emory’s mission statement “to help men and women fully develop their intellectual, aesthetic, and moral capacities,” and this is why I want to attend Emory University.
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Please tell me any grammatical changes I should make, if this supplement is good, any addendums, I plan to send this out along with my common app tomorrow. Thank you in advance!

<p>Solid essay. Intro is a tad boring, though. Everyone wants to help people, you're not the only one.</p>

<p>Also "Finally, the academics at Emory are challenging but not cutthroat" is unnecessary. Make them think you're just fine with cutthroat academics, that you can handle any challenge they throw at you.</p>

<p>Here's my revision:</p>

<pre><code> I’ve been interested in the human body for as long as I can remember, and have enjoyed understanding the basic life processes common to all species. As a result, I can’t think of a better place to pursue biology than Emory. That said, I understand the rigors of an Emory education and the dedication and discipline a person needs to succeed here. Four years ago when I was a freshmen, I didn’t have my priorities straight. But now, after realizing what my prospective goals are, I am confident that I have become mature enough to shape my future. However, I understand that I am not completely independent yet, and I still need guidance and support from my family, friends, and most importantly the college I attend.

I know that Emory receives more funding for research than any other school in Georgia, and this reflects in the countless opportunities Emory has to offer. In particular, the Robert W. Woodruff Health Sciences Center stimulates my interest in human health and advancement. A subsection of the center, the Yerkes National Primate Research Center, focuses on human health by comparing human’s anatomy to primates. One of the research programs is involved with vision disorders, but the question has to be asked what spawns these disorders. Is good eyesight a function of nature or nurture? Questions like this and more are asked and solved over and over again. The Carter Center, Center of Ethics (Another reason why Emory is a good match for me), Centers for Disease Control, and the American Cancer Society are all positioned just minutes away from the campus. This list is only the beginning of what Emory has to offer.

From people that I trust, I know that Emory cares deeply about its students, individually and collectively. The opportunities Emory provides its students are innumerable and Atlanta is also a great place to begin working. The combination between a small, yet strong liberal arts curriculum with a leading national research institution makes me feel that I will not be treated as some number or statistic, while I focus on my education. Another thing that I notice is that though academics are tough at Emory, the students aren’t cutthroat unlike at other schools. Perhaps this air of acceptance and self-motivation is the reason why so many Emory students go on to graduate school.

Though I realize people may want to apply to Emory University solely on its reputation and even its rankings, I picked Emory as my top choice because of the overall package. The countless opportunities for volunteer work, research, and shadowing is one aspect of Emory that I respect and admire. The diversity at a small school coupled with many organizations can give me the chance to express my views and interests. Finally, the academics at Emory are challenging and can really bring out the intellectual within me. I truly believe that Emory follows its mission statement "to help men and women fully develop their intellectual, aesthetic, and moral capacities," and this dedication for excellence is why I want to attend Emory University next year.
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<p>I'm ready to send this in.</p>