I honestly think I am the most lost entering freshman at my school. I am going to UC Davis this fall, and I have absolutely no idea why I chose the school. When I was choosing a school back in high school, I was depressed and super antisocial (so much so that I chose a dual enrollment program and did my senior year at CC). Anyway, I kinda just listened to my parents on what college to go to because I really couldn’t choose between the main schools I was deciding between (cal poly, ucsb, and uc davis). They thought uc davis had the most prestige so they liked that school, and me being indecisive just listened to them.
Anyway, orientation at Davis was horrible. I met no one… just talked to my roommate a bit. I also did meet one person but we didn’t talk too much nor did we have much in common. When I looked around, everyone was sitting in tablefuls of friends, except me (I sat with one person with whom I had no common interests with). I know it’s my fault for being anti social, but I can’t help think that’s whats gonna happen when I start school. I can’t seem to fine people with common interest. Everyone seems to be interested in popular things like anime, gaming, or just partying… but none of that stuff interests me really. I’m old school and like school and like to talk about stuff related to school, or jobs, or stuff that most people would consider boring. It was since orientation that I really started hating my school because I felt that I would be a loner there.
I also wanted to be an actuary for a while now (since beg of 12th grade) and that makes me further question why I chose davis over cal poly and ucsb (note that the 2 schools have excellent actuarial science programs, while davis has none). My major at davis is engineering, and I hear that most EE majors just end up doing programming or other software jobs. I have absolutely no interest in those sorts of jobs and I feel that my degree will end up useless to me.
I am pursuing a degree of no interest at a school I have no desire at being. I really wish I just chose to go to CC and stay a year at home, and figure out my life but I think it’s a bit late for that. Plus, my parents would never approve of me going to CC after choosing davis. If anyone else felt like they chose the wrong college, can you tell me how you coped with it?
@“aunt bea” part of the reason im worried is cause im taking classes with few freshman. Our engineering counselor told us to not take physics or higher math classes cuase its just the first quarter, but because i was a dual enrollment student she said it’s fine if I take a higher calc class and physics. I feel that there won’t be too many freshmen in my classes (and freshman are the only ones eager to make friends because upper class men already have enough friends).
There are people of ALL levels in every major. They’ll talk to you!
My dd goes to Davis (now a senior) and was told by her freshman advisor to take the minimum GE classes first, so that she could build and maintain a decent GPA and get used to the speed of the classes, while adjusting to being a freshman. Ten weeks goes by really fast! She was also advised to go to the tutors from day one, so that she could stay ahead of the classes. She said that all of the “A” students knew this. She met people that way as well.
She had a hard first year socially, because on top of having two RAs who never did their job and we’re always at Truvy’s, avoiding the freshman, my dd and her 2 roommates were so different, and didn’t do squat! My dd spent a lot of time at the commuter coffee shop (near the MU) because the people there tended to be older, more personable/accepting and more agreeable in sharing tables. She could eat there by herself, since most people there were by themselves, and read or play with her phone or whatever. She also got into a volunteer type of club in something that she liked, and found a part time job. She initially tried to get into the intramurals at the ARC, but her sport was full, so she waited.
She’s up there early because she volunteers at Clinica Tepati, but school doesn’t begin for 3 weeks, so she’s interviewing for jobs on campus this week. (Check the Davis career website if you are interested. They are holding interviews in these next couple of weeks-pocket money.)
@iamjack: My older son could have written the same post 2 years ago. He is starting his 3rd year at UCD. He admits to being anti-social and an introvert, along with not being into the party scene. There are plenty of students that feel the same way. It may be very hard at first to get acclimated at first, but over time you will see familiar faces around campus and in your classes.
Where will you be living? My son was in the Primero Grove apartments 1st year which made it even more difficult to socialize vs. a standard dorm. He eventually found a small group of friends that shared his interests, was invited often to their dorms which led to even more introductions and more acquaintances. @aunt bea has given you good advice, so try to put yourself out there even though it can be difficult. Join a club of interest, start up a conversation with a classmate about the upcoming football game or soccer game, go work out at the ARC, get a campus job etc… just realize all
Even though you have the DE credits, GE’s are large part of your first 2 years of classes and you will have many opportunities to meet Freshman students in class. Also switching majors is not too difficult at Davis, so if you find EE is not your thing, you could switch after Fall quarter.
I do not think it is unusual to question your decisions those first few months but you need to give UCD a chance. For my son, it was a rough first year but he hung in there and now realizes that UCD was a great decision in the end.
@Gumbymom Thanks for the cheer. I am going to live in dorms and I booked a triple so I could meet more people. However, my 3rd roommate left saying he should be placed in an honors dorm, and we have yet to find our 3rd roommate. The room switch service ends today I believe, so I think I will just be sharing my triple dorm with one other person, who is an international chinese student. He seems nice when I messaged him, so i’ll see how it goes.
Sharing a triple with just one other is a freebie you should be happy about.
I just think, reading your first post, that if you had picked one of the other colleges you would be writing the same rant. Some of this is just you. Just realize that you have to give things time. People will be acquaintances for a while before they are friends. You are still thinking like a high school kid with ‘people already have their friends’ and not like a college student or adult where friend groups are very flexible and evolve.
I think one of the bigger issues here that the other posts are not hitting on is you are going to a school without your desired major. If you are sure you want to be an actuary, then I would recommend going to a school that has a strong actuarial science program or at the very least a strong math/statistics program. It doesn’t make sense to me why you are taking prerequisites for engineering if your end goal is to become an actuary. I would rcommend looking into what those requirements are or classes that would help you reach that goal and pursue it
If you think you’d rather go to those other schools, it wouldn’t hurt to look into whether that’s possible. I wonder if you could transfer mid-year, if not now…I’m not extremely optimistic about this, but perhaps it’s possible.
Also, if you find yourself feeling down about everything (and your description of your senior year, as well as your experience now, does sound like that), please don’t let yourself get very depressed. It’s harder to get out of it when it gets more entrenched in your mind. So if you need to talk to a counselor of something, please do (I recommend off campus - school and mental health shouldn’t mix for various reasons). Or see if clubs or some kind of social endeavor will help you feel better. Good luck!
In engineering school of UCD, there should be many freshmen skipped Calc1, Calc2, and Physics1. You would not be alone in the upper level classes. In addition, there should be some first year engineering classes too.
Boy, a lot of typos. What I meant see say in the sentence, “just realize all”. Just realize many students feel the same way you do. Going away to a large school with no close friends and having to start new friendships is scary. I am sure in a few months, once you get into the routine of school, you will wonder why you wrote the post in the first place. Hang in there and seek some help if you need it. Many resources are available to you. Enjoy your time, check out the Death star, have a close encounter with the friendly cows and ride you bike along the arboretum bike trails. Enjoy your time at UCD.
As for the “tablefulls of friends” they may not be as close as you think. I’ve sat with tablefulls of “friends” who in reality are just some people from my floor/classes that happened to be at the dining hall at the same time, and we kinda know of each other’s existence, so we all just filter to one table/set of tables. If there’s an empty seat, sit down and introduce yourself, ask what majors people are and just join the conversation. Upperclassmen aren’t all unfriendly, and listening to them is a good way to find out what’s ahead for you if you’re the same major. You could even get recommendations for teachers or warnings about certain classes, etc. I’ve sat with seniors in my major that are graduating in December and while I wouldn’t exactly consider them close friends, they’ve been very nice and weren’t unhappy to talk to me (and I got information on what’s ahead for me as a freshman, like I mentioned above.)
Don’t be afraid to sit with complete strangers. I’ve made one of my best friends so far doing that. He’s a different major, but we get along well.
@shawnspencer Your major does not matter for actuarial science… and as I have said, I am not firm on my decision until I pass my first exam. I look to continue to get my engineering degree while studying for actuarial exams, and if the actuarial career doesn’t work out I have me engineering degree to fall back on.
I look to minor in stats and econ at davis to help me get a background of some of the topics covered in the actuarial exams though.
