We have to travel a great distance for revisit days, and economically it is not feasible to visit all schools. What happens at revisits that is most important, and what will we miss? We are trying to decide visiting Exeter vs. visiting Deerfield. We cannot see both. Even if it was affordable, most revisit dates are booked now for these two schools.
I’m not sure if anyone can speak to how much more they learned about either of these schools based on revisits, and which would be more important to visit. Does either school have something you were surprised or that really “hooked” you (or unhooked you)?
I have read through all their materials, etc., but we have never stepped foot on any of the campuses. Suggestions on which to choose to visit, and what we will miss?
In our experience & in my opinion, revisit days are important & exciting.
Since I find Exeter & Deerfield to be clearly different campus cultures, I cannot recommend a revisit to one over the other without knowing more about your particular situation,thoughts, and reasons for applying to each school.
P.S. Since your concern is about cost of a revisit, consider contacting each school with your concern as some schools will pay for some or all revisit expenses.
Revisits are important to get acquainted with future classmates & to better get a feel for a school’s culture & vibe. Plus, many learn a lot about other prep boarding schools during revisit days as most families will share thoughts & experiences regarding many schools.
FWIW As an aside, I still remember a young lady who was accepted to all prep boarding schools to which she had applied (Andover, Exeter, & St. Paul’s) and her parents were now ready to start the financial aid application process. (That is not how boarding school admission / financial aid works.) Ultimately, she remained at her local public school because the parents did not want to pay for boarding school.
Also, contrary to what I often read on CC, schools do not roll out the red carpet & go to great lengths to create a positive impression. The revisits we attended all presented the schools in an ordinary & genuine fashion.
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We were not able to tour the two schools that accepted our son during his application round, so revisits were first visits for us and were the deciding factor for our son. He chose Choate the minute he got out of the car and never looked back after seeing the facilities. (FWIW, I would have chosen the other school.)
For those who’ve already toured the schools where a child has been admitted, revisits may not be as important. Most people here will tell you how nice it is to be on the other side of the table where the schools are courting YOU. They generally pull out all the stops at revisits–best food, lots of attention and swag, and probably the most exciting vibe you’ll ever feel at the school. Revisits do NOT reflect the typical day-to-day at any school. They are more like a circus event.
I would recommend attending a revisit but not sure attending only one will do anything but convince you that that school is the best (that’s the intent of the revisit program). If you’re already leaning toward one or the other, attend that one, and it will cement your choice.
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I did contact both, neither gave any assistance which was contrary to other schools who reached out immediately to make sure we could visit (we are visiting these schools).
@ChoatieMom These will also be first visits for us. I have found some schools during this process to be much more friendly, welcoming, and generally more in-tune with our family’s needs. Some schools seem to want my child more than others, maybe I need to listen to that.
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Are you willing to share the names of boarding schools which did offer assistance for revisit days ?
I am surprised that Exeter & Deerfield did not offer any assistance as both are very wealthy schools.
I understand this feeling but, remember, admissions is still running the show at this point. After your child matriculates, you and your child may never interact with admissions again. (We never once even saw the inside of the Choate admissions office or talked to any AOs as our son’s interactions were all done via alums). If teachers/coaches are the ones making you feel special, that’s different, but I wouldn’t make a decision based on any interaction with admissions.
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Though my son and I would have loved to have visited the schools to which he was accepted, COVID policies made that impossible. So, he chose without ever having seen any of the schools in person. In retrospect, it appears he made the right choice anyway. In fact, I wonder if upon seeing the others he might have been so blown away by “superficial” factors he might have made a “less right” choice.
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I will just say they were schools with either similar or smaller endowments.
Agree - Covid did not allow us to do in-person visits at all, although we did do a driving tour through two campuses. Honestly it was the interactions with the staff after M10 who answered our questions that swayed my son’s decision and it all ended up working out. We were able to get a feel for the culture of the school through those interactions (quick responses, helpful, etc.) We have found this culture to be the way this school operates. A revisit day would have been nice but in our case not necessary.
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My kiddo applied, interviewed and accepted a spot without setting foot on campus. It was during Covid. And she got into one of 3 so we didn’t have anything to decide between. Thankfully, she loves it.
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The only school with a similar endowment to Exeter is Andover; all other prep boarding schools have smaller endowments than Exeter & Andover.
Yes, some were similar to or less than DA in terms of financial aid budget, but obviously all are less than Exeter. Andover was not one of the schools.
@prepschoolnewbie I am definitely seeing a difference from schools in terms of overall helpfulness, eagerness to answer questions, clarity, outreach, respectful attitude, etc. I hope this equates to overall culture of these schools.
If I had to choose one to visit, it would be Exeter. It seems to provoke more of a binary response - either you love the place, or you don’t. A visit to Deerfield is hard not to enjoy, in our experience, unless the rural setting seems too isolated for your child.
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I am sure it’s been said above but I think if possible it’s very important. It’s where you really get the feel of the school.
My DD passed on a much higher ranked school because of revisit. She really knew where she belonged after that and while it was hard for us to get over our biases, it didn’t take long to realize she was 100% right.
The name school had a much more polished day and markets IMO and we (parents) were quite impressed. My kid really disliked the clickish dying hall dynamics she observed. You only get that kind of thing during an in person revisit.
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I am beginning to feel the same. Exeter seems the most different in terms of all-harkness, huge enrollment, just a different culture that my son may love or hate. I wouldn’t want him to miss a “lightbulb moment”.
I don’t doubt he would love Deerfield, but I also wouldn’t expect any big surprises. I think it’s a good fit, but Exeter is an unknown.
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Totally agree with @TonyGrace .
Not only can you ask the questions you may not have been comfortable or thought to ask during the application process, you can generally ask them of people who may have a different perspective than the admissions officer or the tour guide.
My kid was leaning toward one school pre-visit and came away from revisits with a different preference. At a revisit, kids have a chance to be completely immersed in the student culture for the day without parents, etc. Presumably, all the schools under consideration are reasonable academic fits. The “feel” of the community differs widely from one place to another. It’s far easier for them to assess the fit in that context.
Yes, it’s one day. Yes, the schools try to put their best foot forward. But it is likely that you will still be better informed than you would be without this.
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I totally agree, but we are at a point now where spots are filled and they will not accept another student on a full revisit day. I asked, they wouldn’t budge. And the longer time goes by, the more expensive tickets and car rentals get. In a perfect world, we would visit every school, get the feel, check out the lunch/social situation, classes, teachers, etc. I consider my child extremely fortunate to have choices, so missing out on one or two revisits is not the end of his world.
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Between the two (Deerfield Academy & Phillips Exeter Academy), I would visit Exeter because it does evoke strong reactions & because the town is interesting. But, at this late date, it may come down to available nearby hotel rooms.
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That is true. Some kids find it very overwhelming (physically).
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Wow. I am so surprised at that. We’ve had kids spend the day in non official days. There is no clubs fair and academic info panels etc. No programming for the parent but they definitely let a prospective student shadow another for the day.
But then again… I did say our school was not the best with the polish. The year COVID hit totally killed them, but their yield with kids that attend revisit is fantastic.
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