I hope dinner with your husband’s parents (hopefully on their best behavior ) goes better than you are expecting. Have fun !
I find it helpful, when I have to deal with people that I don’t particularly care for, is to work very hard at pretending that I like them. I fake it very well, occasionally enough to the point that I end up actually liking them. I find something about them that I appreciate, ask them about it and am genuinely interested. People can tell when you don’t like them, and they react accordingly. If they feel that you like them and have something that you can connect with, they behave better. It really works. Even if it’s something trivial.
I agree with the others about not telling them about the baby taking your name, right now. Though you want to get it over with, it will end up ruining their joy about hearing the news about having a grandchild (whether or not MIL already suspects it). Why give them a happy gift and then create conflict? Honestly, I would just be happy, take the path of least resistance, nod and smile. It’s worth it to keep your blood pressure down. Give bad news at a distance.
Because it shouldn’t be unhappy news. And honestly if they take it that way, it’s their problem.
The last name of their grandchild shouldn’t matter one bit and I’m used to dancing around them. I draw the line here and Mr R is on board with me.
The picture we had made for them says “Baby Fish (my last name) coming April 2020” because of how we included the niblings. (Made them one fish, two fish, red fish, new fish?! Onesies.)
If they’re going to let something like the baby’s last name be what ruins the reveal for them, then quite frankly too bad. They’re going to have all sorts of issues with how we raise the kid and THEY get to decide whether that is going to make or break their enjoyment of the moment/journey.
Maybe I’m being petty, but honestly I’m beyond caring. This is our child and we’re choosing how we reveal it. People can like it or not but really it shouldn’t make a difference.
I’m not doing this out of spite. Every other reveal has had us presenting the baby as “Baby (My Last Name)” and I don’t see any real reason why we should change it for them.
Anyway, our minds were made up a while ago and sweet Mr R has reminded me repeatedly in the last few days that this a choice we talked extensively about (the last name) and that we’re allowed to make decisions regardless of how his parents will react. We went back and forth for years between whether the name would be hyphenated or just mine and after years together, he slowly realized why it was so important to me to pass on my name. Mainly because I’ll be the only one to really do so. We happily came to a compromise because, again, it’s our child and only our decision.
If they don’t accept that or take it as a personal slight, then they’re making the reveal about them, not the baby, and I just do not care.
That’s the last thing I’ll say on that because like I said, it’s already decided and we’re going tomorrow. Wish us luck.
Hope it goes with the in laws @romanigypsyeyes !
Best of luck tonight, Romani and Mr. R. Hope you can appreciate the joyful moments.
Along @busdriver11’s lines, tell the R grandparents that you cannot wait for them to do something special for this baby, but be specific: like to each write a family history, or to teach them a special skill they have, or a family tradition.
Make it a request that will have them bonding with the person this child will become, and take the focus off the name the child will have.
I know it’s late in the game for tonight, but there are ‘baby books’ for grandparents to fill out. Maybe order one and tell them it will be delivered to their house. Give them joy, don’t let them steal yours.
I love the grandparents’ book idea. PLEASE ask them to do it NOW! My mom worked on hers some, but it’s not finished and now she’s not doing too well. 
All the best with tonight. Such people are a challenge; happy to hear that you and Mr R are on the same page. The joyful anticipation is yours to have, as are the decision-making of parenthood. Great to have your family support and other members of his family so completely in your corner.
I do wish you luck. It’s unfortunate that this has to be stressful, instead of purely a happy occasion. Hopefully it will be easier than anticipated.
Definitely agree with @mominva about the family history book or tradition to share.
Dinner was overall good. Mr. R came up with the idea for me to order a beer to throw them off and it worked. MIL even texted her work friends that she was wrong.
We presented the picture on a plaque and pretended it was a work award. It was enough that they were genuinely surprised when they figured it out. So that was nice.
MIL was predictably not pleased with the last name situation but FIL stepped in and was just so happy to see the ultrasound that he was like “I couldn’t care less what the last name is as long as mom and baby are healthy. That’s the most important thing.” Which is the response I was hoping for.
FIL was always much more ok with us not taking their name than MIL so I’m not surprised he was the rational one.
So dinner at least was all in all successful. I’ll count that as a complete victory.
You bet it is. Way to go FIL!!!
Now, get some stress rest!!! 
Given what you told us about these folks, yes, it was a success. Congrats on handling it so well. Lol at the beer.
^^^ Yeah, who got to drink the beer???
Mr R lol. He ordered a sprite for me.
I love the beer and plaque diversions.
Yay for Mr.R’s idea for keeping your news under your control.
And, yay for Mr.R.Sr. for keeping the focus on this new life!
Whew! I am sure you are relieved.
I’m glad that hurdle had a happy outcome! Cute that mil texted her friends she was wrong. My fil saved the day for us years ago by proclaiming joy over our engagement after mil had an unbecoming response. Lol. In-laws!
That sounds like it went as well as possibly could have been expected. Congratulations! Maybe they will step up and be fantastic grandparents.
Nice that FIL wants YOU to be a healthy momma and have a healthy baby! Sounds like maybe Mr R takes after his dad in diplomacy and FIL sounds like he’s looking forward to little Jedi.
Glad your dinner and reveal went so well. And kudos to Mr. R’s father.
Well I made it all the way to week 9, but I’ll now take those pregnancy sickness tips anyone has to offer…
Tried ginger stuff. Went very not well.
I kept saltines on my nightstand. I’d sip water and nibble crackers to help the nausea. I also lived on chocolate pudding pops for a few weeks. I don’t think they still make those.