<p>I get that you are the only one who knows anything or has any opinions on the college admissions landscape. Your children (both your own and
your nieces and nephews) are certainly the most superior in Lake Woebegone. But please take your supercilious attitude and phony helpfulness somewhere else. And please don't pretend we are friends when you are pumping me for information on what is going on in the college counselor's office; I don't know much, and what I do know I will not share with you or any one else.</p>
<p>The background to this rant:</p>
<p>Her daughter and my oldest son were hs classmates with very similar scores and grades--great kids but I did not fool my self that my son had a shot at HYPSM, nor did he want them. He did ED at Emory and got in; her daughter applied ONLY to BS/MD programs and got shot down at all of them. Her daughter was obviously too perfect to have considered any variations of a Plan B. Counselor pulled some strings and she got in to flagship state honors program where she is still taking 5 years to graduate.</p>
<p>She is convinced that my son didn't "deserve" to go to Emory, and that the 9 Ivy students in the class didn't deserve their acceptances either. Nor did the two who got into BS/MD programs.</p>
<p>This year my S#2 and her daughter #2 did the college tango, and all she did was criticize my son and each other senior for perceived "shortcomings" even if they were not interested in the same schools as her daughter. Those who were "rivals" received absolutely vitriolic treatment--she went so far as to try to ascertain each of the ec's on their lists! and compared them to her daughter's. There was one mom whose son is on a team with mine who said that Nora was actually composing a letter to one school trashing one of the kid's qualifications in comparison to her daughter's. </p>
<p>Next year it is her nephew and then her son and my S#3 are in the class of 2009.</p>
<p>She is beyond obsessed--</p>
<p>She started carrying around a bag with notebooks in it in which she tracks kids/grades s/scores/applications/acceptances and does the same for schools, with all kinds of cross-references. . She badgers people to give her information on anybody they know or have connections to. None of this is necessary; our school has Naviance software which tracks all of this. She even keeps track of what honors kids get, and of activities of kids given kudos in the local paper.</p>
<p>She is creepy.</p>
<p>I have volunteered in the college counseling office for the last several years. I am discreet and I do not and will not gossip about matters there. I do not abuse the trust placed in me. </p>
<p>Nora keeps volunteering to work there and can't understand why she always seems to be given volunteer assignments elsewhere. Now she thinks she should be friendly to me so I will suggest that she be added as a volunteer in the counseling office. It won't be happening.</p>
<p>to my friend, I love you and your family and your dogs, the littlest things I have ever seen</p>
<p>However, your house smells like a men's urinal- I know your dogs are "housetrained", but they do have little accidents when they are excited, and you need to know that your rug is just nasty, wiping it up is not enough, even a teaspoon of dog urine can leave a big smell</p>
<p>So please, get your rugs cleaned and do more....you may not smell it, but boy some of us can</p>
<p>One of the smartest guys I know. He got a 2300 on his SATs or something crazy like that, without studying, and was in the 99th percentile for the PSATs. He is going to Lehigh, a great school.</p>
<p>He smokes pot every night, doesn't study, skips class (he was in Spanish for maybe half the school year at most and probably still got A's anyway) and CHEATS even though he's sooooooooooo ridiculously smart that all he would have to do is a little studying and would easily get perfect grades. That's pathetic. The tiniest effort could've shipped this kid to Harvard. He could have cured MS, cancer, and Alzheimer's. He could have saved lives and made millions...or <em>something</em>!!!0</p>
<p>And he cheated his way to Lehigh. I hope the Lehigh people are happy with him. Hope he doesn't get kicked out, which I could see happening.</p>
<p>To the "hella smart" Columbia girl who thinks she's better than everything else:</p>
<p>Yes, Columbia is an EXCELLENT school, I don't deny it. But just because you smoke crack and slept with that guy from the Killers or something like that doesn't make you a better person. Manipulating others to side with you doesn't make you a great person either. You are not above anyone else. You're still a pretty sad person and I feel sorry for you. But I don't like you. I hope you're proud of yourself, girlfriend.</p>
<p>Wow, that came off really mean...but it was nice to say that.</p>
<p>To the parents of the 11 year old swimmer who just went to All Stars in the 8 and under division: You're not fooling anyone. We all know how old your children are. We know what grade they're in. And we feel really sorry for you when you run, run, run after them with the video camera making some kind of weird video about all of their so-called accomplishments. And it's really kinda gross the way you refer to them as "my all stars". And yes, when you hear us yelling out those made-up names that we all made up for our kids last week when we were laughing and talking about you (champ and slugger come to mind), we really are making fun of you. You're pathetic. (And BTW, we know that you're not really 29 either. Good luck with that.)</p>
<p>MOM & DAD: I'm tired of putting up with Sis's behavior. Yes, she is severely depressed, but that does not give her the excuse to treat people the way she does. She needs serious mental help and refuses to get it. I'm tired of making excuses for her, and apologizing to HER when it's HER behavior that's wrong. It's time for a serious intervention, which I want no parts of. She will forever blame ME for it and that's not fair to me. I'm tired of being the only responsible child that you have, while the other three are allowed to ignore what's going on here. It's time to do something about her, and I cannot help her because she refuses my help. But she will listen to YOU.</p>
<p>SIS: Grow up! Your parents are getting old! It's time to do the responsible thing and think of somebody besides yourself. I know it's hard for you to get out from under that rock you're living in, but believe me, there are better ways to live than how you're living now. Of the five of us, you have the least amount of responsibilities; yet you refuse to help anyone including yourself. We need your help with Mom and Dad, FAST. Please get some mental help for yourself. PLEASE!</p>
<p>To the big butthead with the baby in the stroller, watching me try to back out in a busy parking lot...
I was trying to avoid hitting your baby, you big jerk. You were standing about 2 feet away from my back bumper and I could see you were holding the handle of a stroller, but nothing beneath that. You didn't need to make the "hurry up" twirling gesture with your finger and then start with the ruder ones. Next time you want me just to rev it up and back out without looking? You shouldn't be allowed to take your baby to the store.</p>
<p>Self,
Kick the internet additions habit. You can do it. Just like you kick the online gambling( with play money of course). Limit the time you spend on internet per day even for college education.
You and your D has made a college list, it's time to kick the habit.</p>
<p>To the college coaches who are kind enough to respond to my son's emails:</p>
<p>Why do you insist on changing or "correcting" the spelling of his name? Do you honestly think he doesn't know how to spell his own first name? Even when you correspond a few times, you change the spelling each time but never write it correctly. Just use the "copy" and "paste" feature in your word processing program, if it is too difficult for you. Other than that, he's very happy to hear from you!</p>
<p>to my Ds friends, love ya but there is more to life than sports and I really wish you understood that what my D does for ECs are cool, she doesn't need your approval, but a little, Cool, would be nice</p>
<p>Bet none of you got your own internship, etc all on your own</p>
<p>Sports are good, but they are not all there is and I really hope you discover that soon</p>
<p>Congratulations, big man at the movie theater. You yelled for 3 minutes (after the movie started) 'cause some little 16 yr old didn't turn her cell phone off fast enough to suit you. But I notice you didn't let out a peep when the three ginormous teens in front of you who text-messaged obsessively and filmed parts of the movie and their lights were just as bright as hers. Hey, big man, if you're going to be a jerk, be an equal-opportunity jerk.</p>
<p>To the other posters who cut and paste my comments out of context ''CUT IT OUT". Stop doing it to anyone.</p>
<p>People are allowed to have a different viewpoint than you. If you don't like mine, don't read it, or respond HONESTLY.</p>
<p>To all the rude and unappreciative posters, learn to say "Thank You" when someone gives you information. You will be respected, set a good example, and be a bigger person. You might even start to like yourself.</p>
<p>Yes, it is possible that your African American friend who apparently had lower stats than you only got into some of the elite colleges he did because of his race. And yes, it is possible that if you were a minority, you would have had better luck with college acceptances. HOWEVER, that does NOT mean that AA is to blame for the fact that you didn't get into any of the places you applied except for your extreme safeties. Believe me, even if all of the minorities who "only" got in because of their race (whatever that means) weren't accepted, there still would have been many more qualified applicants than you.</p>
<p>You see, my friend, the reason you didn't get into any schools except for your extreme safeties (ie. throwaway apps to nearby colleges that don't even make US World News top 100) is because you deluded yourself into thinking a transcript full of more Bs and Cs than As and not particularly splendid scores could get you into places like Princeton and JHU. And therefore you showed no interest in the one safety you would have actually liked/was actually a pretty reputable school, and didn't even apply to any matches. I don't know how your high school counselor let you do that (my guess is you wouldn't listen to him, just like you didn't listen to me or anyone else who tried to warn you). </p>
<p>And, you know, I would feel sorry for you, except you had such a superior attitude through the whole process (to the point where you refused the waitlist at that good safety, even though you actually had a shot of getting off of it. And to the point where you made the same mistake and only applied to one extreme reach as a transfer). AND you're STILL complaining about it and talking about how unfair AA is a year later. Seriously, maybe if you didn't think you were better than anyone just because you write knockoff fantasy stories that have once or twice been published in tiny knockoff fantasy magazines you would do better in these kinds of things (that's not to say being published isn't an accomplishment, but come on, it's not your own novel or the New Yorker here!).</p>
<p>Love,
Weskid</p>
<p>PS. You know, the fact that you're only getting average grades at the school you're at might tell you something about how well you would have done at those uber-reach schools if you HAD gotten in. Just saying.</p>
<p>Dear sixth grade English teacher,
I know you thought you were, as you kept telling us, "just a white guy from suburbia who majored in English at the state university," but to me, you are much more than that. You are infinitely wonderful for making the difficult and unpopular decision to teach at an inner-city school, with kids who are behind and parents who are apathetic to their kids' progress or lack there of. You are especially great for taking on an ESL class, a class of which I was a part. You looked past my accent and incomplete sentences, which really were not sentences at all. I know I could not write creative stories or act out scenes from a play, but with your positive and encouraging attitude, I never gave my shortcomings a thought. You whole-heartedly believed I was a great student and transferred me to your honors class after a mere three months. I thrived there for three years, outgrew it, and moved on to a great high school, of which there are few in NYC. I am weeks away from starting as a college freshman at NYU on a big scholarship, and only wish I could find you and thank you for making my dreams come true. </p>
<p>To my real estate agent,
1) If I provide you with a phone number of someone who wants to see my house, your job is to call them. You don't seem to understand that the internet provides different ways that people can find out that my house is for sale other than the MLS and your website. I explained that this person found out my house was for sale on zillow.com. zillow did not show a listing agent. (I've updated that now). Can't you just make one call? Or have one of your assistants make the call? I decided to use a full service broker just so I wouldn't have to deal with buyers and now it seems I'm expected to make the calls?<br>
2) The local paper called and interviewed me about the current market and selling a house. I'm sorry that they didn't pick one of the "nicer" houses you have listed. It would have been helpful if you were willing to brainstorm with me about other things I can tell them when I speak with the reporter in person this week or what else I might do to get the house ready for the newspaper's photographer instead of spending our entire phone call wondering why they picked my house instead of one of the other houses you have listed and telling me all the reasons your other listings would have been better for them to write an article on. I'm actually not sure what I'll do if you call the paper and they use one of your other listings for the article. I know your other listings have been on the market longer than my house but I'm only interested in selling my house no one elses. The paper called me, they wanted my story, don't try to take this opportunity away from me and my efforts to sell my house.<br>
3) You promised to call me every Monday with an update. Why haven't you? I know who comes through the house since I have to make all the appointments to show the house. But even a general market update would be helpful, are other houses selling? Are other listings as quiet as mine seems to have gotten? What else has come on the market that is my competition and what are the asking prices (interesting that the house across the street was just listed and you don't seem to know anything about it and I'm not holding my breath for you to get back to me about the asking price because I don't think you will). Don't worry, I know how to check on the MLS, I just thought you'd know what's up in the neighborhood since your the "area specialist".<br>
4) Oh yes, I began my search for a new listing broker after we got off the phone yesterday. When the listing expires with you, I'm not planning on renewing with you. I believe I can get better service and pay less commission.<br>
5) and some how it seems rude that you always ask after my cats but not my son and while you remember the cats names, you don't remember my son's name? I know you don't have kids. I love my kitties, but my kid is much more important and the sale of the house is a big issue to him. The cats really don't care.</p>
<p>to self: don't be mad at yourself that the listing doesn't expire until the end of sept. you'll get through this. selling a house is stressful.</p>
<p>I am tired of being Mother (finder-of-all-things). My uterus is not a homing device. I'm busy, find your own d*** socks, bike lock, car keys, brain.</p>
<p>In my case its my daughter. We will never lose her because she is Gretel - she leaves a trail of stuff wherever she goes. Then I am magically supposed to know where she left each item. If - God forbid - her father or I put her stuff away, she complains because it's not where she left it. </p>
<p>My coffee table is apparently a magnet - it attracts and holds onto DD's stuff indefinitely: nail polish, empty soda cans, full soda cans, socks, homework, ponytail holders, cell phone, iPod, various chargers... If her stuffs not there, apparently it's my fault and I am supposed to know where it has migrated to.</p>
<p>One day she'll be away at college and my coffee table will stay neat for days at a time, and I'll probably miss the mess. At least that's what I keep telling myself.</p>