<p>To my former classmate:</p>
<p>You truly surprise me O_O</p>
<p>When we ran into each other you remembered me as the smart girl and said I should major in Rocket Science. I don’t understand. Didn’t you laugh at me when one of your friends called me ■■■■■■■■ years ago? He always tried to make me look like a spaz and you gave him an audience.</p>
<p>Are you being sarcastic?</p>
<p>Too little too late, you impossibly selfish jerk. Maybe you’ll learn to appreciate what you had once you’ve lost it all.</p>
<p>Second year in a row that you have come into my home as a guest at our company holiday party…second year in a row that you have subjected us to your passive aggressive insults and forced your opinions on us and let us know how you disaprove of our choices in pets. We are all entitiled to our opinions , yours is valid and so ours…I just don’t shove MINE down your throat at what is supposed to be a celebration…everyone else is having fun without a personal attack.</p>
<p>Yes, we have a new dog. No we didn’t get a shelter dog with perhaps some remote chance of a lineage of the breed we sought. No the breeder wasn’t trying to " get rid of her "
Yes ,the breed has docked tails. but ahem, isn’t your husband circumcised 
? I am sure the trauma inflicted on him in his first few days of life was about as memorable as the tail docking of our dog…
Learn to socialize with humans when you are at a party for them…or go to a PETA meeting and skip us next year. You are making a fool of yourself and it needs to stop !</p>
<p>Why can’t I be a better advocate for myself in health issues? I hate that I’ve developed my mom’s selfless, nice-girl thing. I am in pain. I’m calling in on an emergency basis in the morning.</p>
<p>How dare you malign your daughter for the choices she has made in her life?! How is it you can fail to understand that she chose to be a stay-at-home mom precisely because you chose to leave her in the care of her older siblings who were themselves too young to be left on their own, nevermind charged with the care of their 2 to 13 year-old sister??? Of course she is distressed by the fact that her sister’s children are suffering some of the same consequences because their mother made many of the same self-centered decisions you did! How dare you proclaim her “dependent upon her husband,” “unable to support herself,” or “lucky” to have a husband who can support their family? She is financially dependent upon him–a choice made by a longterm successfully married couple, not happenstance–as he is dependent upon her for the many unremunerated aspects of their family life. Her ability to financially support herself may be unproven but, judging by her high function in every other aspect of her life, it is not really in question. And luck has nothing to do with her family’s success–it’s all do to hard work, not the least of which is done by your brilliant, talented, giving daughter!</p>
<p>It’s good for you that you define your own success by the achievement of a terminal degree in your field and a very ambitious and admirable career, because if you were to judge by your ability to nurture or appreciate your daughter or a life partner (not to mention your ability to balance a checkbook, maintain a household, or make responsible financial decisions) you would have to recognize your own failures and validate your daughter’s success. Perhaps you should broaden your definition of success and acknowledge your own shortcomings if you truly want your daughter to forgive.</p>
<p>Why do I have to “behave” at your family’s christmas dinner when you spend most of the time with my family making loud, under-your-breath comments about them? Just because you can’t hear that well doesn’t make the rest of us deaf</p>
<p>And I so behaved myself…when the J word was said, in the disparaging tone…I kept my mouth shut because the kids weren’t in the room. I was the cold sober one, drinking the expensive champagne…all night long.</p>
<p>Yes - it makes you look fat. Now stop asking me.</p>
<p>You have no faith in me. All you want to do is keep me trapped here, not because you care about me, but because you think I can’t do anything without you. There is more to my life than you and this stupid, trashy town we live in. You are just limiting me. </p>
<p>Starting now, I’m giving myself two years to completely live my life in my own image whether you like it or not. Hopefully two years is a reasonable time frame because I’ve had enough of you being disappointed in me.</p>
<p>I’m going to live the next decade to the fullest, look out world.</p>
<p>“Georgetown is the safety school for my D, she won’t go, she’s waiting for HPY. But glad to hear your D is accept by Georgetown too…”</p>
<p>I’m trying really hard to start off the year with a positive outlook, but every move I make to do so becomes depressing. I keep telling myself the glass is half full, but all I can see today is half empty.</p>
<p>So brother dear, how does it feel to have to care for mom for the past ten days? Ha! Not sure what frustrates me more: the special food prep, the never-ending questions, the constant guilt, or just her, an egotistical attention-needy 93 year old. Now you can finally realize why I need an occasional break from her. </p>
<p>My life with my complicated 3 kids and H is sooo much more complex than the stupid simple one you have (retired, no one else living with you, and a daughter who cooks for you living a mile away). I’m sorry your wife died 18 months ago (I miss her too), but you have to get over it and stop feeling sorry for yourself. </p>
<p>It absolutely drives me bonkers that somehow Mom feels obligated to be “equal” about gift-giving, when I have to care for her 24/7 and you only call once a month.</p>
<p>I love you …we all do. You have to get it together because you cannot afford the fallout if you don’t. So many things can be lost…your job, your child. You have to listen to everone that is telling you the same thing , we are not all wrong. You are walking on dangerously thin ice and we are all so worried…please take a deep breath and listen before it is too late</p>
<p>(AUUUGH. I come here to complain, and the college being advertised on the top banner is the one that just decided not to renew my husband’s contract!!! Uncool!)</p>
<p>Also, please, mosquitos and rain, stop messing with my Belize vacation. Also, would love it if this mattress were slightly higher than “mother-in-law’s fold-out couch” grade. DESPERATELY trying to enjoy myself and relax here, but all three of you, the mosquitos, the rain, and the mattress, are severely detracting from my relaxation experience.</p>
<p>I may not come back tanned, but I am GOING to come back RELAXED, darn it, just to thumb my nose at all of you.</p>
<p>When are you ever going to learn? It’s obvious to me you don’t care one bit what alcohol is doing to you and what it’s doing to the people who love you. </p>
<p>I ask you where everyone slept this weekend? Oh, guest room, basement, wherever they fell down. What amazes me is that there were PARENTS there and they allowed a group of underage college students to drink themselves to the point of oblivion. What were they thinking? </p>
<p>Oh, and those pictures you think I can’t see? I can. </p>
<p>You’re a fool. You’re the only one who can help yourself. I can offer you the resources but you have to be the one to accept them. I can’t stand to watch this train wreck any longer.</p>
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</p>
<p>Amendment: I’m now sunburned and contented. Thank you, Off! and a good night of sleep and a brief opening in the clouds. :)</p>
<p>I hate that it’s going to cost us $2000 to attend this family event. It’s 4 months away and I’m already dreading it, since you have turned into the walking definition of “pretentious.” There will be more alcohol around than anyone needs, and I know you have no qualms about serving it to my 18 year old. You will all be young - or young looking, or pretending to be young - and full of yourselves. You will manage in some way to make some sort of comment that appears innocent on the surface but is really designed to remind me that I’m not quite as sophisticated/wealthy/hip as you are.</p>
<p>I saw the holiday pictures. Yes, cousin, you look good. But frankly, when my kids are in their 20’s and living on their own, I don’t think they’re going to want DH & me to attend their parties and play beer pong with them. You think you are youthful and fun. I think you look pathetic.</p>
<p>You are a dear friend and I didn’t mind loaning you things, but I am not a pick up and delivery service. And when I mention that we need something back after a month, why do you act surprised that you haven’t returned it? Its huge and weighs a lot. Its not like its easy to overlook. ANd then I am supposed to come pick it up? Leaving it in your garage for us to come get is supposed to be convenient? For who? Certainly not us! And the other thing you borrowed. It “broke”, huh? And you want to know if we want you to replace it? The answer is YES!! It wasn’t broken when we lent it to you. I am guessing you will forget to replace that too. I don’t need it now, but I might someday, and please dont tell me it was “old” or “on its last legs” . It wasn’t that old and it worked fine when I lent it to you. REPLACE IT and DON’t make me call you to ask for it. That is tacky. Doesnt matter if I need to use it right now or not- it is ours and we’d like a working one back.</p>
<p>And I am happy to buy stuff from your son when he sells it for a fundraiser. But when you call me to ask if we will be home so he can drop it off, TELL HIM TO SHOW UP! We sat around and waited for him. Oh. He forgot? And WE were supposed to call YOU to see where he was?? That was the same thing you told me when my H sat around waiting for you to bring something by, but you got distracted by other things. We dont have all day to sit around and live on your time schedule. Oh, and when you didn’t bother to come by or call my husband like you said you would to return whatever you had borrowed then (and again, asked why HE didn’t call YOU when you didn’t bother to show up), you again made us come by and pick it up. This game is getting really old. My new years resolution-- no more lending to you or sitting around waiting to live on your time schedule. Oh, and the “gifts” you give? They are either clearly very cheap and/or are regifts. And you have no need to be cheap.</p>
<p>*** Oh, and while I am at it, when you want to borrow something (that big heavy thing you borrowed TWICE and didnt return–!) DONT call me when I am out of town at a conference to ask me if I know what my husband’s schedule is so you can mooch. Call him for crying out loud. I am not his secretary. And dont give me a 5 minute dissertation of all the things you have to do so its easier if my H delivers the borrowed item to you. He is busy too. And you are a helicopter mom anyway. You wouldnt be so busy if you werent writing your s’s thank you notes for college visitations for him. He is a big, smart boy. Dont tell me he “has a lot on his plate” so you have to do it, then you are busy and we have to deliver crap to you because you are so busy. Our time is as valuable as yours.</p>
<p>Ok, this was supposed to be “our” time after raising kids. Rather than spend time with me you fall asleep every night on the couch watching some stupid reality show. At 8pm. Lovely. </p>
<p>What the h*ll am I supposed to do with my life now? Thanks a lot. I guess our running joke about why you married me is true after all. The joke is on me!</p>
<p>You are a nice guy but I hate to be blunt, you are useless. The silence in our phone conversation today is somewhat awkward but what can I tell you that I’ve not said already for the last few months and vice versa. Please don’t waste mine time and your time.</p>