<p>I can say that my sorority does not care about clothes or looks when choosing members other than looking somewhat presentable, only cares about money to the extent of “can you pay your dues?” (with or without FA as offered both through the school and our sorority, and we only care about “quirkiness” to the extent that we’re a diverse, somewhat “quirky” house. But we really are diverse–looks, majors, interests, goals, probably money (though my school doesn’t have many “big money” people at all). I’m a research geek, and most of my sisters don’t do research at all. Many of my sisters are very athletic, and I (literally) can’t walk. My sisters run the gambit from conservative to very liberal, from atheist to hardcore religious, and everywhere in between. Are we all best friends? No, but we are all sisters, and . As someone who spends a lot of time with grad students, my friends in the house are really my touch-point for being an undergrad.</p>
<p>Well D’s decision is her own. At least her school does not allow rushing until sophomore year. So she made friends last year and got involved w/ a few things on campus. She is also an RA this year and that should keep her busy.</p>
<p>She was always involved in theater in hs. Last two yrs. she had a lead in the musical. I’m pushing her to get involved w/ her school’s theater.</p>
<p>I looked it up and her school does have APO (do not know how active it is). So I will suggest it to her. Thanks for that info.</p>
<p>The NPC sororities/women’s fraternities all have national and local charities that they support as philanthropies. For instance, Kappa Delta works with the Girl Scouts, Kappa Alpha Theta’s philanthropy is CASA (Court Appointed Special Advocates). Both Pi Beta Phi and Kappa Kappa Gamma have literacy-based philanthropies.</p>
<p>Greek organizations on campuses raise a tremendous amount of money for their local communities, much more so than the non-Greek orgs. Additionally, the all-sorority GPAs are almost always higher than the all-women or all-student GPAs.</p>
<p>You can also belong to a NPC, NIC, NPHC “social” GLO and to Alpha Phi Omega at the same time. I remember chapter sisters of mine who were in APhiO way back when. My D is in both as well.</p>
<p>My bio sister and I are members of the same NPC women’s fraternity although we are from different chapters since we went to different colleges. I have been involved in alumnae associations since graduation, my sister was less so. However, she recently moved to an area with a very large, active association and she jumped right in. My D is still an undergraduate. She lives in her GLO’s house. She probably will get involved with her org’s alumnae association upon graduation. It’s an instant local connection when you move to a new area.</p>
<p>2bizee,
"My D won’t even consider applying to a college that has more than 10-15% Greek. She doesn’t want to replicate the awful scene from her small public HS where some were “in”, others were definitely NOT IN, and some Queen Bee directing the whole thing. UGGH. "</p>
<p>You can tell your D with 100% certainty that college situation has absolutely nothing to do with HS. D’s school is big time Greek (known for that in our state) with sororities filled with Barbi dolls. She is complete opposite of that, very much into academics and very outgoing and popular because of being nice not for anything else, never shops for expensive clothes and so forths. She did not plan on Greek at college, then decided to join, was nominated for president, declined because of busy schedule, still took a board position, went to National convention, had a ball and awesome new experiences participating in sorority life. One of them, now she knows that she can speak in front of audience for hours and do it with ease. They took care of one of their “sisters” who got sick and many other very positive things she is done being at sorority. And she is very busy otherwise, there are only 2 pre-meds in her sorority (D. and her friend) and they have to maintain very high GPA with very challenging classes. Of course, it is different from school to school, but there is nothing like HS.</p>
<p>The bashing of certain groups of people on this forum gets under my skin at times. I am very academic, a non-drinker (well, okay, I’ve drunk once, after turning twenty one), and physically disabled. My best friends in high school were mostly cheerleaders and drill team members, though I had friends out of those groups. In college, I joined a sorority, though I again have friends outside of the house. Both of these are always stereotyped as mean, petty, shallow groups, but they’ve been among the kindest, most welcoming people I’ve met…?</p>
<p>All I can say is that my sorority sisters include some of the most accomplished women I can imagine. Graduate degrees from some of the best schools in the country, amazing professional careers. The stereotype of fluffy-airhead-after-a-MRS simply wasn’t true IME.</p>
<p>My D is having a wonderful college experience which includes Greek life. Her friendships are not based on GLO’s. She’s another who had “little to no Greek’s” on her college want list. She also had “rural”. She ultimately chose neither. ;)</p>
<p>My only direct experience with a sorority is with reputedly the most conservative sorority at UT-Austin… let’s just say, judging from the group photos, it was 99% white. Are there racially diverse sororities out there? I know there are historically black sororities; what about Asians and Latin@s and Natives?</p>
<p>Completely concur with several posters before me. Like psych_, the perpetuating of sterotypes of certain groups on this forum bothers me and is the main reason I don’t come around this forum as often as I once did. I’m a Greek alum and my daughter is now a senior collegiate member with a near perfect GPA, involved in research with kids with disabilities, working on honors thesis and applying to Ph.D. programs. Her interest in children with disabilities was strengthened through her work with her sorority’s philanthropy. There are many other girls in her sorority who are prepping to apply to grad school, law school and med school. They are hard working, smart, and kind girls. DD has close friends inside and outside of the Greek system.</p>
<p>I’m not one who believes that you have to be in a sorority to be happy and I’m also not one to talk negatively about other groups of people. I think kids will find friends within the activities that they become involved in, so I believe in encouraging kids entering college to follow their hearts, interests and instincts but to become involved in whatever intrigues them and they will find where they are comfortable. Find your passion.</p>
<p>APO is great (I’m a brother, have been a chapter officer and a National Convention delegate). But I’m not sure I’d consider it “Greek”, the name aside. While we were a “service fraternity”, my chapter didn’t consider itself part of the school’s Greek system.</p>
<p>Some people go for fraternities and sororities, some don’t. Some would do so at one school, that happened to have a house that they liked, but wouldn’t do it at another school, that didn’t. All of these are valid choices, and none of them preclude a social life at most schools.</p>
<p>MagnoliaMom, she’ll be fine. While I am a believer in the Greek system, was in a sorority that helped get to where I am today, and have a D1 who is benefiting from her sorority much like your D1, if D2 does not want to go Greek, she will still find her place on campus.</p>
<p>I have to agree with you in the stereotyping. I avoid certain subjects like the plague. D2 was a competitive cheerleader (flyer) for years. I rarely get into any discussions of this. She was on a very athletic team, one who won real national titles; but unless you have trained and competed at this level, you just don’t know…</p>
<p>The thing that bothers me about the Greek system is the voting on new members. It seems like current members size up prospective members and ask, are you good enough to associate with us?</p>
<p>Don’t forget that this is a 2 way street. The sororities are also being sized up by the prospective members. Also, the groups look for someone who is a good fit (yes it does sound like college admissions) not at who is “good enough”.</p>
<p>No different from how employers recruit employees and no different from how colleges decide on applicants. </p>
<p>Yes, Keilexandra, there is racial diversity. Even 20 years ago, there were girls of all ethnic backgrounds in our houses. H’s house, a historically Jewish one, had a black president and a Thai vice president. My house had a black president and a Latina president during my tenure there. It was utterly no big deal. Different campuses are different, which needs to be emphasized in any Greek discussion.</p>
<p>After attending an overwhelmingly Greek school I transferred to one where the system was less than 10% and thought I’d reached heaven! I even rushed my Freshman year and couldn’t get over that others were sizing me up for admittance. It isn’t a job with a paycheck, it’s a social club and definately not for everyone. </p>
<p>People often say systems are different on every campus, yet frequently end up on these forums with lists of best and worst, fattest, meanest, druggiest, etc… I mean really - had enough of high school yet?</p>
<p>This is only my experience and it doesn’t mean anything more than that it was my experience:</p>
<p>One of the reasons I deactivated from my sorority in the fall of junior year was that, during fall of my sophomore year, one of my roommates decided to go through rush to see if she could join my sorority (which I had joined fall of freshman year). She was a brilliant girl, wound up becoming a lawyer, very funny, lots of good qualities. She was also considerably overweight. She was “dinged” with no discussion. It was clear that she was dinged solely because of her size. </p>
<p>When admissions officers and hiring managers decide whom to hire or not, it’s because of specific experiences that the applicants have had. While the world in general is “fattist,” college admissions and hiring managers will look at someone’s weight as one factor of several. In my sorority, it was the only factor that was considered when my roommate was dinged.</p>
<p>^^^ Good to know. It was an honest question. I can tell you that Alpha Delta Pi at UT-Austin is NOT racially diverse. In the many different group photos hanging around the house–hundreds of girls–I think I saw two possibly Hispanic faces.</p>
<p>But a prospective employee or a prospective college student is not the same as a prospective friend. It just seems wrong to me that the prospective sorority sister would say to the current sisters, I want to be your friend, and the current sorority sisters would think about that and say yes or no. Friendships do not (or should not) have the same imbalance of power that an employer-employee or admissions officer-applicant relationship has. But they seem to with the Greek system.</p>