What about Scripps? Near LA, gives merit aid, and isn’t super competitive.
The fact is that the more financial aid you need, the less picky you can be about the schools that are offering that aid.
You might be able to pick the region, the urban/rural environment, the size, the accessibility to hiking or surfing, but it’s unlikely you’ll be able to pick them all. You are never going to be able to control who the other students are or what they spend their money on,
Write out a list for all the schools that give full, 100% financial aid. You can add some that give good aid that includes merit if her stats match with what that school requires to get that aid (U Alabama Huntsville, for example). If she is NMF, add the schools that give aid for NMF (UT Dallas, florida schools). When the list is complete, have her start crossing off schools she will not EVEN consider. She’'ll see that the list starts shrinking pretty quickly and she’ll need to be more open to a school that may be, in her opinion, a ‘rat race’ school or too rural or not have the same prestige.
Schools like CU Boulder and UVermont suggested above will not be on the list because 100% financial aid is not available. Some instate schools may be on the list even if she really doesn’t want to consider them.
I assume your daughter could go to a public school and not put up with the pressure of the rat race of the elite private school. She chooses (or you choose) to accept the free tuition from the private school, so you have to endure the things you don’t like about the school or the other students. Same at college. If you want/need full COA, you have to compromise your list of ‘wants.’
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The student I know who went to UVM from another state came from a family with very limited means, not sure how it was paid for.
Utah is great for outdoorsy kids, and has 30 full ride Eccles merit scholarships per year (which are competitive but not as difficult to get as many of the cohort-based scholarships elsewhere). Most out of state kids come either for the specialized programs (Dance, Theater, Music, etc) or because it’s cheap (in state tuition after the first year) and they love the outdoors. Note that the need based aid is only for in-state kids AFAIK.
Plenty of students working on campus and it doesn’t feel like everyone is wealthy. My D18 loves it there (she had similar stats, 4.0UW, 35 ACT, 9 APs with eight 5s) and another CC poster’s D also won one of the scholarships this year.
A student I know, also OOS with a single parent, not wealthy, received about half her costs but borrowed a lot. Student borrowed about $40k directly (yes, it can be done with extra $4k/$5k direct loans and some loans from the school), the mother borrowed some, and used some 401k money. I think it was more of a stretch than they first thought when they got that large award, but the bottom line was that UVM is very expensive, so even a large award may not be enough.
UVM expects all students to take the loans before need based aid kicks in, if it ever does.
I’d suggest looking at Beloit (reasonably close to Chicago) and it has all sorts of resources to help students like your D
@socaldad2002 just curious as to when the last time you visited URichmond? My D18 just visited there a year ago as it was one of her top picks (we visited 3 times over the course of a year) and we found it to be a very collaborative atmosphere. We saw a good bit of diversity considering the size of the campus. We actually met with a compsci major (who was from AL) and a chemistry major (from MO) who were anything but ‘preppy’. It has one of the top business and leadership programs around, and it’s science building is not only state of the art, but gorgeous. They have a highly respected female chem professor that really impressed us and who has won awards. Close to DC if you want metro and museums but also the mountains if you want to escape. When we went back for admitted students day we ran into our tour guide from our first visit a whole year before and she stopped to talk and actually remembered my D!
I grew up middle class but my parents were first generation college. When I went to a college with many students who went to elite private high schools I was a bit overwhelmed at first. I felt behind because I wasn’t fluent in another language and never took Latin. There was a whole set of children’s books I had never read even though I read constantly growing up. OP’s daughter will likely be on the same footing academically as any other students and will not feel behind like I did. As far as the money situation, we all lived on campus and ate at the same dining halls. Some people went on more interesting vacations and didn’t need to worry about paying for med school. But, that didn’t affect day to day life for me. There were also other students who had more financial concerns than I did.
Like others have said, people do grow up so college social dynamics are probably more humane across the board than they were in high school.
All that is my way of saying that you might want your daughter to visit a wide swath of schools before you start crossing schools of the list in anticipation of snobbery. Do cross off schools you can’t afford based on the individual cost calculators.
As far as actual experiences, the vibe at U of Puget Sound was too laid back for my son. He a
So didn’t groove on Reed even though I was sure he would love it. Your daughter may feel differently. I have a family member who loved Wheaton/MA and one who felt too pressured as Wellesley. The Wellesley grad actually finished her coursework at Harvard and felt more comfortable at Harvard. She was not living on campus and was just finishing out electives so not really comparing apples to apples,
Good luck and best wishes.
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I second Beloit. My daughter is there and she loves it ?.
Privates in CA/WA/Western State that are generous (at least when we applied) w/merit aid: Willamette, Lewis & Clark, University of San Diego, Chapman, Dominican University of CA, University of Denver, Puget Sound, University of Redlands, Occidential, Seattle Univ,. Univ of Portland. They are good colleges; many have a more collaborative/less competitive or intense feel. They want kids with stats like your kid’s so they tend to be generous w/merit aid to attract bright students. This tends to attract kids with financial need as well. Just because they are private and therefore more expensive full pay doesn’t mean they are filled with full pay students.
Other great privates (not as great for merit aid as I understand): Santa Clara, Claremont Colleges,
Have heard great things about Utah, NAU, and Colorado College.
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Not sure about your other preferences but high GPA kids who want out of the rat race seem pretty common at Carleton in MN. I think the women’s colleges might be worth at least considering. They tend to have a fairly supportive of each other vibe.
@chicago5010, I know this isn’t what you asked but I’m going to throw some advice in anyway. Please feel free to ignore it…
Admissions season can be brutal, and especially so at an elite private school. Kids will be saying things like “I can’t make the game this weekend because I’m doing my overnight at Brown” and “If I don’t get into Princeton I can always go to Connecticut College” or “Why would he apply there? I thought he was smart.” Oof. No one means to be cruel but they’re all so caught up in the angst of applications that some kids can be thoughtless.
My advice is to give your daughter language to use when kids are questioning the choices she’s making. The best way I’ve found to do this is to do some research on the strengths of the schools she’s looking at and to talk them up. Some examples:
“The Ivies are great but most of them don’t have programs in sports science. The University of Louisville has the top program in the country.”
“Eckerd? I’m kind of jealous. They have their own beach and amazing marine biology programs.”
“The great thing about UMass is that you’d be able to take classes at the other colleges [including elites Amherst and Smith] while still saving for grad school.”
Repeat these things enough and you’re likely to hear them coming out of her mouth.
It’s especially important to support the less conventional choices of her friends and classmates and encourage her to do so as well. Not only does it reassure her that you value the less elite schools but models healthy behavior around admissions. It may also help her to change the conversation around schools with her friends. Believe me, her school’s college counselors, and her friends (deep down even if they don’t show it) will really appreciate it. She may think everyone else is feeling confident but many are as rattled as she is but are working hard not to show it.
It’s possible that if she feels less pressure your daughter will find the idea of applying to a few high-powered school more palatable knowing that you’ll support her if she gets in but decides not to go. A few months with the pedal off the metal may be just what she needs. Either way she’ll feel supported by you, and that will go a long way.
@cptofthehouse I live about 15 mins away from Soka. I have been on the campus a few times over the years. It’s a very pretty clean campus. My H and I went to Mariachi performance there once, which was fun. They do have a lot of concerts and events held on the campus. (I think the university opens up their auditorium to local performing arts groups) My kids and I went to a little fair on the campus once, but we didn’t stay long because it was hellishly hot. The wife of H’s old friend from high school works there and she seemed to like working there and would always rave about the school. We fell out of touch with them a few years ago, so I don’t know if she still works there.
One odd thing is that you don’t hear a ton about the university locally. In our area you hear a lot more about UC Irvine, Chapman, and CSU Fullerton, then you do Soka. Other then it being a beautiful campus, I can’t say much more about the place. I don’t know anyone who’s attended. It is located in a very quiet suburban area. D’s good friend used to live right down the street.
Could be worth looking into for OP’s daughter. But, I know little about it…
I’ve been looking at info on this school. Very unusual. Certainly not part of the rat race but it’s hitting all the right keys to get a high rating on a number of guided.
@ultimom - Not sure I would agree with you that college is a more humane experience than high school. I grew up in a small, rural town and went to public high school. We had our issues, sure, but students mainly got along and we were happy together. When I got to college was when I first encountered classism, and it wasn’t pretty. Don’t even get me started on the gossip and double-crossing. My mother had told me college would be the best 4 years of my life. No. In terms of social life, high school was way better than college.
The most elite schools have the most generous FAs. Why not pick one or two high reach elite schools? It is only a rat race if you or your DD make it to be one. Aim high, have a “well-rounded” school list, not fall-in-love with one school till that one school also falls in love with you back. Good luck.
I would add Lewis and Clark in Portland OR to your list to check out. My D2 had similar stats to yours and Loved it there. She went hiking all the time, took the (regularly running) campus bus downtown, learned slack lining and renaissance fencing on campus.
@ASKMother “just curious as to when the last time you visited URichmond?”
I didn’t visit but did research into the college and the students themselves say its lots of NE, upperclass, wealthy, preppy, and conservative kids. I like the real responses from students at Niche website. Gives a pretty accurate picture of what to expect. Not saying UofR isn’t a good college to attend, just doesn’t seem to be the “best fit” for the concerns addressed by OP.
Classic over generalization.
Who wouldn’t want to attend a school with such wonderful attributes assigned to an entire student body.
The handful of responses from anonymous niche posts is certainly proof positive.
UR is actually pretty southern too. And wealthy and northeastern don’t usually produce a whole lot of conservatives either. You wouldn’t have enough students to be viable over time with that profile.
@cptofthehouse yes it is unusual. And it certainly is not part of the rat race. Like I said before, I don’t know anyone who has attended or is currently attending the school. I did hear once that it was a popular school for international students. I have no idea what percentage of the student body is from instate and out of state. Isn’t a popular choice for students at the school I work at. I eat lunch from time to time with the guidance counselors, might have to ask them what they know about Soka