Throughout my high school career I’ve been a good student (4.26 GPA, 1500 SAT) but senior year has been really tough on me. I took a bunch of classes that I shouldn’t have that have left me feeling lost and worried about the future. I got through first semester without destroying my college acceptance chances but my grades have been slipping second semester. AP Euro, AP Micro, and Honors English IV have been fine but I have C’s in AP Calc AB, AP Physics C: E&M, and Honors Latin IV. I think I’ll be able to hold on to C’s in Calc and Physics but I have legitimate concerns that I could get a D or even possibly an F in Latin. I have been accepted to a few schools (Richmond, William & Mary, Pitt), rejected and deferred by others, and am waiting on a bunch in regular decision. I feel lost; many nights I can barely get myself to do my work and even when I do I still don’t do well. I’ve began to question why I even worked so hard in high school because I’m likely to end up at Pitt as the other schools I’ve gotten into haven’t offered me any money. I’ve worked so hard and would be ending up at a school that I could have gotten into if I had put in half as much work in as I did.
Beyond school I met this girl that I really like and the thought of breaking up when we go off to college crushes me. I’ve had a pretty rough love life thus far and I finally feel like I’ve found someone for me. To make matters worse, she’s going to be gone for most of the summer so once graduation comes it’s probably over. I just want to be happy and I feel like nothing goes my way anymore. I play lacrosse and even that has been going poorly as I’ve been dealing with a chronic hamstring injury that won’t go away. All of my friends took easy senior years (easy classes, senior privileges, etc.) while I have no senior privilege, barely get five hours of sleep a night, and have no time to do anything that I love. I messed up so badly and I just want things to go back to the way they were. I don’t know what I’m expecting in a response from someone on here but I just wanted to get this off of my chest because bottling it all up just makes it worse.
Anyways, if someone has been through something similar I’d appreciate some advice or similar experiences, thanks.
I actually went through a similar process, just not in senior year. It was as a junior and once the second semester hit, I was swamped with AP’s, the pressure to keep up your GPA, and SAT testing. It was a terrible few months where I was just in a deep funk. But I got out of it!
My mom had actually been diagnosed with clinical depression before, and when she saw me in my basically quasi-depressive state, she knocked sense into me. She told that I was a teenager, that I had a whole life ahead of me, and that no matter how much you feel like you are going nowhere, there will always be another opportunity. For a while all I could say was you don’t understand but I began to think, why am I doing this to myself? What is the point of wallowing in self-pity and depression when I could make the decision to pick myself up, work hard, and get back to feeling happy and enjoying the present instead of worrying incessantly about the future?
I don’t really know how to explain this, but all in all, like my mom said, you have a whole life ahead of you. Even if you end up at Pitt, it’s really not the end of the world. You can make the most of it once you’re there, and rather than thinking about the hard work you didn’t have to put in, praise yourself for the work you put it that others couldn’t drag up the effort to. In my opinion, you’re much better than those who slacked off.
As for your love life - I will be blunt because I’ve always been skeptical about high school romances. My parents were actually high school sweethearts, so not to say they aren’t successful, but I’ve dated around myself and I don’t believe that high school romances last (in part because my past boyfriends were, safe to say, not the best). But, like bodangles noted, if it’s meant to last, it will. I’ve seen a high school couple last for three years while living on opposite sides of the US and lacking the money to fly and visit each other, even on holidays. If it doesn’t work out, you have at least 4 more years at college to meet new people and date!
Hey man, cheer up. Sometimes I feel like this too, though just remember the hard work will pay off. There’s 7 billion people on Earth, you’ll find many beautiful people and make many beautiful friends. As long as you’re determined, you can do anything – you don’t need grades to prove your ability, passion and dedication. Just keep trying to sustain / lift up your grades. Schedule everything out to the minute so you can save time for things you love (or sleep) by creating checklists - you’ll find yourself finishing more! Plus, if you’re left with only few options – to go to a school that’s not that great – take it as a chance to stand out. If not many great students go there, become number 1 and you’ll absolutely stand out compared to going to a school full of geniuses and being the average.
You got a scholarship at Pitt. That’s not a waste! The real waste is getting into a selective school and being offered nothing except the privilege of paying sticker price. At your age, romance is really just a big distraction. Getting dumped was probably the best thing that ever happened to you. You may want to drop a class so you can breathe a little. Enjoy your senior year!
It gets better. This is a hard time – you don’t really know what the future holds and nostalgia for the past can be strong. Do you have some one you can talk to? Just so you know, I met my husband when I was a senior in hs. We went to different schools across the country from each other, only had pay phones and letters to communicate, and we have been married for 20 years! Breath deep, it gets better.