<p>^Maybe that’s the most typical configuration for new dorms, but the vast majority of colleges I know don’t have a lot of newly-constructed dorms (alas!).</p>
<p>I’ve lived in double rooms until last semester, so I’ve had three roommates in college so far, two girls and one guy. I’m female. My male roommate was by far my favorite roommate thus far – we just got along the best and we were more respectful of each other’s boundaries. (Against the stereotype, he was definitely neater than me, haha.) I think I’m less comfortable living with just girls. My freshman year I lived in an all-women’s dorm and then an all-female house and ugh…didn’t like the social atmosphere of either. Girls tend to group up in such cliquey ways.</p>
<p>If a school required me to live in a single-sex dorm, I would seriously reconsider going there. I would personally be uncomfortable with a school limiting my social circle like that. Most of my close friends at college so far are my housemates, people I live with and interact with on a regular basis. Just me.</p>
<p>
True, true.</p>
<p>I read pages 1,2 and skipped to 5. I didn’t see any posts from students (or parents) where the student actually did live in a single-sex dorm. S did. All students did. It’s been that way forever and I doubt will ever change. Yes, a Catholic school, but not conservative by the standards applied on cc to Catholic schools.</p>
<p>There is grousing here and there in the student newspaper, but repeated years of studies show the students (as a group) are happy with this arrangement. Students are almost always in the same dorm the entire time on campus–85% of students live on campus. There is no Greek system and the dorms very much stoke the same passions and loyalties Greeks feel.</p>
<p>I don’t think it limits binge drinking, at least not in the male dorms. There are many advantages. Of course there are some disadvantages too, but not to the extent listed in the 60+ posts above mine. It appears most of the posts were written by people who didn’t have direct experience with actually living in a single sex dorm, or they lived in a rare single sex dorm which was determined by self-selection.</p>
<p>Sryrstress, it sounds like I’m on my way to your son’s school. :)</p>
<p>Sry, the simple choice is to leave it up to students. They’re adults, let them make the choice.</p>
<p>
Sryrstress made no allegations to the contrary that I can see, merely stating that the characterization of single-sex dorms by many posters here who have never lived in such a dorm is largely inaccurate, and that they are not innately inferior to mixed-sex dorms.</p>
<p>If someone was misinformed on the nature of mixed-sex dorms (which certain posters have been) and you corrected them on it (which you have) would it mean that you were opposing an adult’s right to choose whichever they preferred?</p>
<p>^ What? Literally all I was saying was that the simple choice, the one that would avoid argument and debating, is to offer both types of housing and allow students to choose. Nothing more, nothing less. When did I say sry was opposing their rights?</p>
<p>Additionally, I don’t think anyone has said it was inferior, only that they wouldn’t choose it. Hence the leaving it up to personal choice.</p>
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You did not, just as the poster you were responding to did not. Your post implied that you were opposing their views with adults having the right to choose their dorms, whereas the stated views of said poster were not in disagreement with that. Sryrstress was just defending single-sex dorms as a good choice just as you have defended mixed-sex dorms as a good choice.</p>
<p>I would prefer single sex dorms. I think the Tom Wolfe rendition of co-ed bathrooms int that “I Am Charlotte Something” cinched it for me.</p>
<p>When I went to college in the dark ages, though the dorms all had unlimited open visitation, all but two floors were single sex. I really preferred the privacy of a single sex dorm. There are just times when I prefer to be with members of my own sex. </p>
<p>I haven’t examined any stats on the matter, so I can’t say what is beneficial and what isn’t but I think that it would be nice to have this choice. I grew up with brothers so living with males and sharing bathrooms was not new to me. Still I just like the all girl setting. In my day, they only had a few coed dorms. Offering an all male, all female choice would not be a bad idea. </p>
<p>There was no shortage of finding future spouses and serious relationships in a single sex dorm. In fact, the one stat I can state clearly is that of those of us who married classmates, not any of us were form the two coed dorms. The liasons from there all failed. Some of them terribly. Not say that the same did not occur in the single sex ones. </p>
<p>I don’t think it’s a problem to offer a choice. What I don’t like about Catholic U is that it is forcing the issue.</p>
<p>Though Catholic U is not the most fundamental Catholic college, it is up there on the list of Cathloics universities and colleges. It is on the approve Newmann Society list.</p>
<p>Wait what exactly is it that this University is trying to limit? Co-Ed DORMS or Co-Ed Residence HALLS? Because, you can be in a co-ed residence hall but in a single sex dorm. I have seen it layed out in a way that one part of is for women and the other for men. Or it can be mixed up meaning no particular part of the building is for women or men…you can be a female while the neighbor across from you is a male but you still have a single sex room. I dont know if this discussion is about co-ed halls or actual co-ed rooms.</p>
<p>I dont think co-ed rooms should be mandatory. You cant force that upon someone. However, I feel co-ed halls should be greatly suggested. Its just part of developing your social skills. The age where you are so shy of the opposite sex you walk the other way when you see them or avoid being near them because you are so shy should pass with age and surronding yourself with nothing but the same sex as you is not going to help in the maturity proccess. In your career you are going to be around both sexes…you cant freeze up everytime you do a presentation in front of a cute guy or a girl you like. </p>
<p>But at the same time you dont want the person to be a nervouse wreck because they are so preoccupied to be living so close to the opposite sex which is something they are not used to. So, in that case there should be maybe two residence halls that are single sex. One for the ladies, and one for the gentleman. Although the amount of space in these halls should be limited as to encourage involvement in the co-ed living.</p>
<p>This whole discussion is interesting and educational for an old(er) man who went to UVa
in the 1950’s, illustrating how UVa and society in general have greatly changed. UVa
in that era was a genleman’s school (girls only in nursing and education schools if memory serves) and we all wore coats and ties to class. For dating we went away “down the road” to girl’s colleges, bringing them to The University for special weekends. There
was no such thing as coed dorms, but the many fraternities invited girls to parties, some
“respectable” and some not so much. Panty raids in the girls’ quarters at the nursing school were always considered a big deal. There was a lot of drinking, but I never even
heard of marijuana. Times do indeed change, and I’m just an oldtimer remembering.
Thanks for the interesting posts.</p>
<p>I think it can depend a lot on the individual hall in question, too. A lot of people here have complained of girls dorms being catty, whereas my girls dorm was the ESCAPE from catty behavior. In the co-ed dorm the girls all ganged up on each other and wrote nasty semi-anonymous insults at each other on the white board in the hall bathroom, and on each other’s doors. You were either in the “in” crowd or you weren’t worth speaking to. In the all girls dorm I moved into the next year, just about everyone was friendly with everyone else, and people didn’t mind if you joined in with their friends even if you weren’t in the group-- it was like being a big family, even though I was one of the girls who DIDN’T have a ton of friends in the house. Nobody ever let me feel left out unless that was what I wanted, which was an experience I’ve never had in my life anywhere else. It was so nice. And while it is important to be able to deal with a variety of people in life, including men, it was nice to have that one year to just be girls together without all the drama and mess and noise that boys tend to bring. I wish I could still live in that kind of an environment somehow, but now I graduated. :(</p>
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<p>This will NEVER be mandatory and no one in their right mind would suggest it.</p>
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<p>Many co ed dorms (including the one I lived in as a freshman UG) have single sex bathrooms. I think everyone agrees that that arrangement is a necessity for multiple reasons.</p>
<p>Any time you have a policy for “all”, it can be problematic as exceptions do arise. Having some single sex facilities available would be a nice amenity. Many of the kids go off campus these days after a year or so in the dorms and they then find apartment mates as they please.</p>
<p>Though dorms are mandatory for freshmen and sophomores at CU, there are not enough facilities for juniors and seniors who have to enter a lottery for university housing. So anything goes after sophomore year.</p>
<p>Oldtimer:
What exactly were panty raids?</p>
<p>I went to Notre Dame, where all the dorms are single sex and visiting hours are enforced (not perfectly, but basically enforced). There was plenty of dating, and Lord knows plenty of drinking, but what was BEST about the visiting hours and single-sex dorms was knowing that you could sleep in your room every night and not be “sexiled” if your roomie was entertaining gentleman callers. I hate the idea that my daughters could come home to find a signal on the doorknob that they’d better find another place to sleep that night–and I’d equally hate for my daughters to do that to their roommate. If the goal of college is education and a degree, co-ed free-for-all dorms don’t help get you there.</p>
<p>^ policies about visitors seem to be pretty much independent of dorms being single-sex or coed to me … not sure having single sex dorms substantially changes the situation.</p>
<p>Not a chance in hell. Very much looking forward to co-ed dorms at Duke.</p>
<p>Went to a state u. back in the 80s–all freshman lived in single sex dorms and in separate areas (quads) of the campus from upperclassmen. I also lived in coed dorms (by floor) for two years. A few differences I noticed–in the coed dorm, girls had to be more careful about, say, leaving the bathroom wearing a towel since they’d be much more likely to run into guys in the hall. There were supposed to be visitation hours, but they were rarely enforced, and more likely to be broken in the coed dorm since they guys were already in the building–no sneaking in and out required. One year, my roommate’s bf literally moved in with us. (One couple was kicked out of the dorm–so noisy they offended the entire floor)Yes, much more hanky panky going on in the coed dorms, in my observation. I think that having girls around helps the guys to be cleaner, quieter, and more civilized–less frat-rat-like-- in general. I think the guys had the opposite effect on the girls–public areas were dirtier, parties more likely to get out of hand, hookups, even acquaintance rapes seemed more likely. As a girl, I probably preferred the single sex dorm since it was quieter. BTW, my D goes to a conservative Catholic college which just built a new coed–by floor-- dorm (its first). I’ve heard the argument that coed dorms are safer for girls (i.e.–an attacker knowing there are no men inside a girls’ dorm makes the girls more vulnerable?) S went to a school with all single sex dorms and absolutely no visiting inside the dorms. Ever.
(Certainly cuts down on the “near occasion of sin”) I remember one of my friend’s moms (in 80s) being SHOCKED at the idea of boys being allowed to visit girls’ dorm rooms, even for limited hours. "Those are their “BEDROOMS!” she said. She had a point. I wouldn’t allow my Ds to take a boy (friend or boyfriend) into their bedrooms at home. Am I just old-fashioned? I’m sure coed dorms won’t go away. But for those who want them, single dorms should be an option.</p>