So throughout grade school, I’ve gone by the nickname Shasha. However, my legal first name is Elizabeth. You’re probably wondering, how do you get Shasha from Elizabeth? Haha. I was adopted at age two, and the orphanage I was at had been calling me by my Chinese name, so I naturally responded to Shasha better than Elizabeth after being adopted. Shasha doesn’t seem like a hard name to pronounce, but people have always mispronounced my name as Sasha and have always asked how I get Shasha from Elizabeth. As a rising Freshman in college, I’m considering going by Elizabeth instead of Shasha.
The PROS of changing my name to Elizabeth is that it’s an easier name and more relatable to people since Elizabeth is a well known name. Going by Elizabeth allows me to pick a nickname from Elizabeth, like Izzy or Libby, which is exciting for me. Changing my name is also like a new beginning which I’m looking forward to in college.
The CONS of changing is that people would still mispronounce Shasha as Sasha or call me something completely different (ex. Shi Shi or Sho Sha. Both of which I really do not like). Also, I’m going to a school that many people (including some of my friends) from my high school are going to which would be confusing–and a little weird–if my new friends are calling me one thing while my old friends are calling me another.
I’ve asked friends and family about this, however, I haven’t gotten a definitive answer from them. I’m hoping I could get more input from other people. Thank you for taking the time to read this and responding to this!
Does it really matter, in the big picture, that people mispronounce your name? My birth name is Laura. People mispronounce it all the time. You would not think that, would you? Seems pretty strait forward. But…
Think about it this way. What sound does the au combination of letters produce?
Answer: The short O sound, like the word “awe”. Therefore, my name is Law-ra.
However, people say Lora all the time. Even my brother, father and mother- in law of 24 years.
A lot of times when I meet new people, they will mistakenly call me Lori or Lauren or Loren.
I have grown so accustomed and it is ok. There are bigger things to worry about in life than this. Depending on the situation, sometimes I do politely correct them if they get the entire name wrong but mispronouncing it, I hardly notice anymore, therefore ignoring it, when I am called Lora.
My mother, who has a first name and last name (she uses her birth name professionally) that’s very easy to pronounce in my native language, but gives English speakers trouble. When people tell her that they have difficulty pronouncing her name, she responds, “Well, I guess you’ll have to learn.”
It’s your name. If you want to go by you legal name, or a more common nickname, feel free. However, if you want to continue to as Shasha, go for it, and correct people as necessary.
My sister, who went by a short form of her given name, decided to go by another when she started college. (Think Beth deciding to be Liz.) Except she kept forgetting to answer to her new name.
Over time, most people called her by the long form (Elizabeth ). Except for old friends who knew her as Beth.
Logistically, your teachers may write recs for Shasha – you probably want to tell colleges your nickname in the app if there is a space to go so. Your records will all be Elizabeth at the college, and profs & others will call you that unless you tell them otherwise. Which you can choose to go. One of my kids is interchangeable between her given name and nickname at college – everyone seems to cope.
I didn’t intentionally change my name when I went to college, and what happened ended up being what made me happiest. I have a nickname that prior to college was used only by my immediate family (so I answer to it quite readily). When I went to college, I introduced myself by my full name, and to my roommates I said, “…but you can call me [nickname] if you want”. Eventually my roommates started using it, as well as my close friends from the dorm and my teammates (one of my roommates is in the same sport), but friends from class and professors still call me by my full name. If you think you won’t get confused by people changing what they call you, try planting a seed with a couple of people and seeing what happens.
My mother’s name is Martha. In college, everyone called her Marty, and her college friends still do today–55 years later!
My cousin was one of three nurses named Cathy on a busy hospital floor, so everyone started calling her Kate to avoid confusion. Friends from that job still call her that.
I know several Filippino people who always go by nicknames–except at work. At their jobs, they use their birth names.
I had a last name that was impossible for others to pronounce and I found it very annoying to always need to have a discussion about it. I couldn’t wait to change to my husband’s simple last name when we got married!
These are just a few examples of how people use different names in different situations–lots of people do. I think college is a perfect time for you to try out Elizabeth. See how you like it! If people hear others call you Shasha, you can just say, “Oh, that’s a childhood nickname; please call me Elizabeth.”
Your professors will know you as Elizabeth. It’ll be up to you to tell them how you want to be called (in a situation where the class is small enough - freshman composition, foreign language, recitation/discussion section). For friends, it’ll be up to you to decide.
Make sure that you respond to Elizabeth though.
This is really a non-issue. For the Common App at least, each page of the app, including recs will include the unique Common App ID. It will take colleges all of a nanosecond to match them up. Additionally, on the personal data page, you are asked for your preferred name in addition to your legal name. It is very common for Asian students in the US to have an English nickname and it never seems to cause a problem. Hyphenated last names, though, wreak havoc.
As a fellow Elizabeth, I very much understand. Here are some thoughts:
First, let’s look past college: Elizabeth is an excellent name for business and professional use. It is universally recognized when you travel (I usually look up local pronunciations of the name before visiting a new country). It looks good on publications and business cards. Most importantly though, when you give the name to a barista it does’t get mangled.
For what it’s worth, I think “Shasha” is a very pretty name. I adore it but I completely understand wanting to move to something new. I moved from my childhood nickname to a new one when I went from middle school to high school. From high school onwards I turned in all papers with the name “Elizabeth”. Most high school teachers and favorite professors learned to use my (new) nickname while still recognizing that I was Elizabeth on paper and in formal situations. The new nickname was a fairly obvious derivation from Elizabeth so it didn’t require any long explanations as the childhood name would.
So good luck! I don’t remember too much trouble transitioning from my original nickname to my chosen “adult” nickname (which I still use fwiw). It probably helped that my brothers and peer group were strongly supportive of the change. My parents never stopped using the original and I never asked them to. Today, it is only their generation and a few cousins who still use the original.
My friend’s brother was known as “Boofer” all the way through high school - it’s what my friend called him when they were young, and the nickname stuck. He switched to “James” once he got to college. He’s now a well-respected professor, so it’s a good thing he switched.
I think this is a great time to change the name you go by…You have your “legal” name which the professors and the college will know you by, and how you introduce yourself to people at college. You can start with Elizabeth and then see what nicknames people use, or you can decide which nickname you would like:
Liddy
Libby
Liz
Beth
Betsy
Lizzie
Ellie
and more.
I would suggest that you pick one and let your college friends know that you go by “Liz” (or whatever)
Thank you to everyone who has responded! It really means a lot! I’m still thinking about it but I have until Fall. Thank goodness! I’m starting dance at a studio this summer so I’ll go by a nickname of Elizabeth and hopefully it’ll help me decide. Thanks again!
