Should I commit to Grad School ? Please help me.

Student Lounge College Life
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The top question is pretty self explanatory, but I’m going to go into detail on my college background & why I’m posting here today. I really, really could use a seed of knowledge, some recommendation & possibly personal testimony if it’s available. I’m just so unbelievably lost right now & will accept any help thrown my way. Thank you in advance.

I’m currently a fifth year college student in total, but at my current University I’m only a third year student because I transferred after 2 years at a comm. college and I really feel lost and depressed. I’ve changed my major back and forth from Psychology to something different twice (including English & Sociology) & i’m currently majoring in Sociology but I feel such despair about my college route and I don’t know what to do… Psychology is my one, true, die hard passion. It’s what I know. What I love. But because of math and biology requirements I switched to Sociology because I am pitifully horrible at Math. I barely passed Statistics after my third try on skinned knees… I know what a struggle math would be, which is why I’m pursuing a different major currently but I can’t help but feel like I failed myself & my dreams. I feel like a f!cking cop out and that’s just not me. I’ve been in school for a number of years now and my father won’t pay for any more of my education despite the fact that I am a bright individual & my total tuition thus far pales in comparison to what some other people are paying these days considering I’ve always attended school locally. I just don’t know what happened & feel like I’m stuck in turmoil and it’s killing me. I wanted to attend grad school SO bad just four years ago… I used to beam telling everyone I was going to get my Doctorate in Psychology & help children confined to a hospital bed. Now i’m gradually dropping out of courses & not showing up to others because of serious disinterest, but I really am intelligent without bragging… I don’t know what is wrong with me all of a sudden. Maybe I’m depressed? I go from wanting to drop out one minute, to still maintaining the motivation to attend graduate school the next. I actually took a grad course last year and was the youngest my Professor had ever taught at a 500 level course at only 19 years old. And I got a flawless A. Undergrad lectures full of 200 kids? Forget about it. i’m in another world and just cannot be bothered.

I know nobody can tell me which direction to run with my life, but I feel like I’m in the midst of some crisis and wanted some feedback. Anyone else go through something similar? What did you do? Please, please extend your words of assistance. I’ve already had to extend graduation (My “four years” of bachelors would have been due this past May, but i’m still going & have to go again next semester, which my father doesn’t even know). How long does it take the average person to graduate? I was told on average most aren’t getting their Bachelors until the 5-even 6 year mark, but my father is so close-minded he wouldn’t understand this. This all with the crutch of not being in my current major while at a community college feels like it put be behind a few steps because I didn’t really get any “necessary” courses out of the way then in regards to my current University… It was more or less courses that allowed me to graduate from THERE that I was taking, but I can’t dwell on past experiences and decisions.

I know many people recommend working for a few years & then attending Grad school after but I feel like I’ll have to be all or nothing here… I know if I leave school I’ll be stuck in a different routine three years down the line & won’t have the time nor the energy to commit myself. Plus, the grad school where I’m currently getting my Undergrad is only about $7,000 and change… Not too horrible when you consider other’s bills. However, I really don’t even know what to major in… I like Sociology, but it feels like a compromise for Psychology, which I loved. Still do. My GPA is about 2.3 and I don’t know how to get it up… This is due to my failing Statistics the first time around.

Overall, the worst aspect is that I feel such a deep, gnawing sense of jealousy, regret and despair when I think of what I wanted in comparison to what I have now & what I’m working toward… I feel jealous when students talk about Graduate school & there I am, wanting to burrow into the ground beneath me. I hate it. I almost wish I could have a “re-do” in regards to my current path… I know that sounds awfully elementary, but I really feel that way. I want to re-do my grades, GPA, courses, etc.

What did everyone else do? Anyone else feel this before applying (or not) to Grad school? What about my passion for Psychology in regards to what I’m majoring in? Sorry for the plethora of questions, but I appreciate anyone who read all this.

Someone please help me. Thank you.

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At this point – if you can even get funding through your father or other means – you need to take the shortest route to a bachelor’s degree possible, regardless of the major. People with a variety of majors can wind up in a variety of careers. You said your original dream was to get a “Doctorate in Psychology & help children confined to a hospital bed.” Not many people with a “Doctorate in Psychology” have anything to do with helping “children confined to a hospital bed.” If you want to help children in need, there are other ways and paths to that goal.

Find out which major you can get as fast as possible, while you have funding for school. What you really need is some work experience – either paid or voluntary – to go along with your studies. Get out there and start volunteering or working for organizations that are helping children, either directly or indirectly. Find out what types of work environments you truly enjoy. How much time have you really spent in a hospital? Have you volunteered in one? Have you helped at an office? What about a school, daycare or retail store? Build up some job skills and connections by volunteering or working part-time, and explore your interests some more through those activities. It could lead to a job upon graduation that you could do until you decide what, if any, graduate degree to pursue. You may discover that what you really enjoy doing, once you are out there in the real world, is something that doesn’t need a graduate degree, or it just needs a certification. Keep in mind that even within the areas of psychology and helping people, there are people who offer therapeutic services through experiences in nature, with art, with music, with horses, with cooking…there are many ways to help people.

In the meantime, use the resources of the career services department at your university. Take some tests and quizzes to determine where your aptitudes really are – they’re not in statistics, obviously, but you will have your own set of strengths. These tests can tell you what type of jobs you are most suited for. If you dream of helping children in need, then you can look for jobs using your strengths but toward goals that you admire. By volunteering, working and taking career aptitude tests, you can start to get ideas about what type of degrees or certifications to pursue in the future. But that’s the future. At the present, you should be focused on getting that bachelor’s as soon as possible and working a bit to find your way and re-gain direction and enthusiasm.

If you really cannot get funding to complete your degree right now, then seek a job that puts you in contact with children, as well as some volunteer work on the side that also puts you in contact with children in a different context. If helping children really is your passion, then you will enjoy the experience and learn a lot from it that will be useful to you in the future when you are able to complete your studies.

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Thanks for your valuable input. To be frank, it wasn’t everything I wanted or hoped to hear, but it all has truth to it. I appreciate and respect your opinions.

Can anyone else add to this?? Anyone in my predicament who DID pursue Graduate school? I really am yo-yoing with the potential & unfortunately, it isn’t enough for me to hear that it will be “hard” or a “big financial investment/commitment” because I’m not easily scared out of doing what I want to do. I am cautious though, which is why I ask for personal testimony here to compare & contrast what others have done in regards to similar situations.

Thanks again.