Should I move in with my dad my junior year in college?

It is my sophomore year in college and my dad only lives thirty minutes away from my college. I have enough scholarships that my tuition is almost paid for. I took out a $4500 loan my freshman and sophomore year because it was the one without interest and I figured it was fine because that is only $9000 of debt for all four years. With my scholarships and loan, I get back $1600 a semester. My mom also helped me out last year, paying part of my housing, and so I only had to come up with about $300 a month plus expenses, which was not hard. Last year, I didn’t really speak to my dad even though he lived nearby. This year though my mom is not helping me financially, so I have to pay $730 a month in rent, plus about $30 for my electric bill (that’s the only bill, and my apartment is close enough to walk to class and furnished). I also have to pay for all of my food and expenses. So I am paying probably a little less than a thousand dollars a month. I am working a lot more than I did last year to accommodate this, about 30 hours a week. I feel like I am working all the time and barely have time for my school work or anything else. Despite working what feels like all the time, I am barely able to cover my expenses and I am very stressed.

This year I have started seeing my dad, getting lunch or dinner once every couple weeks. I haven’t ever been close to him though. My parents got divorced when I was six, and my mom got remarried two years later and moved three hours away. I also have a little brother (14) and sister (17). My brother moved in with my dad three years ago and my sister lives with my mom and rarely speaks to our dad. I told my dad how my mom stopped sending me money and that I am super broke all the time, and he suggested I move in with him. (I am not complaining about my mom not helping me out financially, I know that’s common).

So I have two options to try to save money. I could move in with my dad and commute like a half an hour plus parking every day, or get a different apartment a couple miles from campus. My apartment is on campus (which is why it’s more expensive) so I can walk to class every day. The ones slightly off campus are like $400 or $500 compared to my $730 right now, so I would still save like three hundred a month.

Regardless, I’ll have to commute. So I’ll have to pay for parking and gas, but that’s a lot less than rent! I’d like to move in with my dad for the financial benefit, but I do not know how living with him after living alone would be.

My little brother lives with my dad so I could see him a lot again. We’ve barely seen each other in the past few years. My sister comes up a lot on the weekends from my mom’s house though to see me and I doubt she’d want to stay with my dad, so I’ll probably see her less. I turn 20 in January and my dad knows I sometimes go to parties and drink, but I don’t know if that would bother him if I moved in there. I would also have to commute thirty minutes and pay for parking every day. Living away from everything with my dad would probably be hard for my social life, but so is working all the time.

So my questions are: Is it a good idea to move in with my dad my junior year? Would it be better to just get a cheaper apartment and keep living alone? Even though he has and I am an adult, do you think he would try to tell me what to do?

Seems like the cheaper apartment may not be that much cheaper after adding the extra commuting costs.

It seems like your most affordable option may be to move in with your father. However, if you are getting need based financial aid as a dependent student, check whether you will have to change your custodial parent to him and what the implications to your financial aid will be.

Also I would ask what would be expected of you.

You are used to being an independent young adult.
Would you have curfews? Can you have people over? Would you be expected to babysit?
I assume you would do chores as you would do that no matter what.

Will be a commuter change your FA? Schools have a different COA for commuters,

I would suggest a heart to heart talk with your dad, Ask him to clearly define what his house rules are and what he sees as your family role in the household. Does he expect you to help run the household? Does he understand the demands on your time?

Another issue, do you want to take the time and effort to reconnect with your father? This is a unique opportunity to get to know your father again and build a relationship. Only you can put a value on that.

You brother should be able to give an idea of whta it is like living with your biological dad. Ask him about things like rules, habits, drama, …

Since you have not had much of a relationship with your father until this year, I would be extremely cautious about moving in with him. It’s a situation that could turn sour quickly.

Why isn’t your father contributing to your education like your mother?

How would your mother feel about you moving in with your father? Would it affect her financial support of your education?

A cheaper apartment, possibly on a bus route to college, sounds like a better option to me.