SINGLE dorm

So I got assigned a single and now I’m super worried that I won’t be able to make as many friends and that I will miss out on the college experience? Should I try to contact them to ask for a double? It says that they won’t do any room changes until two weeks into the semester. I’m the super control freak type and can be kinda introverted so I kinda wanted a roommate so I could grow out of my comfort zone and meet people. idk what to do???

Leave your door open and push yourself to be friendly and more outgoing. Invite others to do things with you, don’t wait to be invited. Having a roommate doesn’t insure that you will have the “college experience.”

A “super control freak type” who is introverted would value having a space that is solely theirs, no? Somewhere they can escape to when they feel like being alone? Somewhere they don’t have to defer to someone else on questions of opening the window, turning out the lights, playing music without headphones?

Yeah exactly that’s why I wanted a roommate, so I could improve that part of myself…learn to get along with others and maybe become more social

You don’t need a roommate to be social. Prop your door open. Hang out in the hall lounge or common room. Go to dorm (and EC) activities. Many people don’t “click” with their roommate and most want to make other friends.

You really don’t have to compromise the only space that will be totally yours to become more social. I seriously think you’re looking a gift horse in the mouth here. Roommates can be great, mediocre, or the absolute spawn of Satan. Mine have, most memorably, stolen things from me (food from a care package my mom sent during finals week) and watched movies, talked on the phone, and played music at three AM (often the night before I had a test).

I’m not even joking when I say you’re way better off not having a double. You have the room to yourself, don’t have to deal with the headache of a potential bad roommate (i.e. plays games 24/7, comes back drunk, invites random people into the dorm etc). You’ll make tons of friends in classes/clubs. Don’t worry! I ended up dorming with a friend in high school and he didn’t contribute anything to my social life; in fact, he kinda ruined my dorm experience. He’d play videogames til 3 AM, invite 10 people into the dorm when I was studying, and be really disruptive. Trust me when I say dorming with someone isn’t always great.

Unless you have a specific person in mind for a roommate, keep the single. You can always keep your door open, join activities and clubs, be curious. But you can also close the door when you need to study or just want to be alone. In other words, you get to control who comes into your space. You lose that when you have a roommate.

I gave my daughter the same advice as above. In the dark ages (pre cell phones), students kept the doors open and socialized in person. Really, we had no other why to interact with someone.

I suspect that the advice is somewhat outdated, at least in her dorm. It is rare that any doors are open. The lounges are usually empty. I would strongly recommend checking out the clubs and events on campus. Make an effort to say hello. Go to the events organized by the RA. Might not be many people there but those that attend are probably looking to meet people. Don’t wait for other to make the first effort since it is highly likely that they are waiting for you.

As for having a roommate, it is literally a crap shoot. Usually there are generally three outcomes: 1) you become good friends (happens but don’t expect it), 2) you agree to exist and tolerate each other (common) and 3) you hate each other to varying degree (also fairly common). A single while can be lonely and maybe isolating is not a bad option if you are willing to make the extra effort to make friends.

That dorm sounds sad @noname87 . My kids dorm lounge is always busy and many doors open. This must depend a lot on the college and the dorm. OP, spend $2 on a rubber door stop.

Just keep the single. Roommates can be hit or miss (In my experience with pre-college programs, mostly miss). I have cherished a single every time I got one, because it gives you a space that is just your own to retreat to. Totally awesome! You can get involved socially in other ways. Consider yourself lucky.