Slowly breaking down in college.

Hello, I am new to the site and was wondering if I could get some insight. So I am a freshman in college and I have been here for about almost 2 months. I love college life, I love being on my own and having new experiences. I have met some pretty cool people that I have become friends with. As I am getting further along in college I have become more and more stressed out. I knew that college was gonna be a lot and I was prepared for that, but its just been taking its toll on me mentally and physically. I don’t eat much at all, maybe one meal a day. I try to eat breakfast but most days that doesn’t happen. I’ve been studying really hard and it hasn’t transpired in the way I wanted it too. I studied for my bio test so much and I still didn’t do well. I am also broke because I had to give up my job. I am constantly spending money on groceries because I try not to eat campus too much and my roommate never offers to buy anything or even help out. Even though I have friends I don’t really have a social life on the weekends because I’ve never been the party type. I go out some weekends and it helps relieve stress. I do also go home some weekends because I live about an hour from my school so that always helps me relieve stress, but I don’t want to always rely on my parents to help me relieve stress. I don’t want to seem like I am a complainer, or whiny, I just want some advice on how to make this experience a little more enjoyable? Thank you.

Confused about your food situation. Do you have a meal plan on campus? Or are you living in an apartment and need to cook for yourself? I am going to assume it is the second. Maybe you didn’t really have cooking & shopping skills before you got there… you wouldn’t be the only frosh in that situation!

Eating regularly is key. Try to plan to shop for food on the weekend with a list of what you need. Plan easy stuff. Honestly, the first summer D2 cooked for herself, she started with sandwiches, fruit that is easy to eat (not stuff she had to cut up), salad in a bag, cereal, baked potatoes. She eventually graduated to eggs. :). And discovered that she likes dried fruit and granola bars.

I’d say start with the goal of eating breakfast and at least one other meal a day from your own cooking. When you are home next time, ask a parent to help you learn a couple other easy recipes. Keep adding every time you go home.

Don’t let your roommate take your food. Set cupboards aside for each of you and label your stuff in the fridge. You need to speak up in this, unless you want to keep spending your money feeding him.

Regarding academics – bio is hard. It is a weed out course that pre-meds MUST do well in. Pass it and move on. Don’t beat yourself up too much, esp. if you aren’t pre-med. Try to block your schedule so you really know how you are spending your time. You might need to improve your time management skills. Lots of frosh really don’t know how to study when they get to college.

If you are struggling at all, take advantage of prof or TA office hours to ask questions, any tutoring offered by departments, study groups, or the writing center on campus if there is one.

Maybe try to work out a few times a week, that can help with stress.

Go home more often if you want to. Do not worry about it. Freshman year is stressful. Both of my kids came home as often as they want to. If you need help of anything, do ask for help. Some colleges have food pantry. I know at one of my daughters school has a food pantry. Can you work a few hours? I know my daughter had a stint at a cafeteria and she can get free food after her shift.

Thank you, and I do have a meal plan but it is a pretty small one, but i try to eat regularly but my schedule is so hectic this semester so I’m busy all the time.

You also need to eat regularly to study well. How do you learn or retain anything on an empty stomach. Grab something to go if you are too busy.

You should be / have just had fall break, which usually comes with a lot of tests right beforehand! Even experienced college kids find this hard, and new ones can feel overwhelmed. If possible, go home and catch your breath. If not, go find the college counseling center- they can actually help. Also, go find the academic counseling center, stat! while grades are still recoverable- oftentimes college is enough different than high school that you have to change your way of studying.

Breath, and take it one step at a time.

How many units are you taking?

Currently I am taking 15 credit hours. Everyone says my schedule is pretty tough because I am taking Calc, Bio, Bio lab, Chem, Chem lab, and english.

you must take care of your body, in order to maintain your physical, mental and emotional balance . that means eating enough, getting enough sleep ,and taking physical breaks to refresh yourself. So TAKE THE TIME TO EAT. 3 GOOD MEALS A DAY. plus snacks to keep you going.
Otherwise your grades and your whole experience at college will suffer greatly.
As a Freshman, you should probably not be taking more than18 units this first semester.

That is a tough schedule. Don’t underestimate how difficult this transition is, from high school to college, from the end of childhood to early adulthood. It takes time to master the skills of adulthood and to cultivate satisfying relationship. It won’t happen overnight and you will go through ups and downs, those ups and downs are always temporary and always changing. Try to eat better, and get ample rest. Use campus resources such as academic support and counseling services if needed. Don’t worry about how often you go home or not, that is your bridge, and you have the good fortune of being able to go back and forth for now. Talk to your parents about how you are feeling.

Also, you may not be able to maintain the level of grades in college that you are accustomed to. The work load and the pace are very different. For a while you may need to preplan the details of everything in your schedule, from eating to sleeping to exercising to studying until you get used to the pace and volume of work. Don’t kid yourself, college is hard work.

That’s a tough schedule. These classes are very time consuming. Yes do eat, keep your sugar level up otherwise you will be running on empty. Make sure you have plenty of sleep too. It affects your ability to concentrate and retain what you learn. The social part might come later and slower. Not everybody parties either.

My daughter is a freshman too, with a tough schedule, and she has found the academic pace a challenge to get used to. She is also not a partier. She is happy with a small number of nonpartying friends, and they have found stuff to do in their very little free time (because their studies and clubs do take up a lot of time) such as go for walks on campus, watch movies together on NetFlix, go out for an inexpensive lunch off campus (only done this a couple times because it costs extra money), go to the free movie on campus, and visit an art museum close to her campus that is free for students at the school. She and her roommate have their laundry time, weekend gym time and walks to the grocery store time built into their weekend schedule so that they make sure it gets done. They do laundry and go to the gym together on weekends to keep each other company, and they walk to the grocery store together because her roommate has a smaller meal plan so she buys her own breakfast foods and they have both been warned by parents not to leave campus without a buddy for safety reasons because some of the areas around the campus aren’t wonderful.

We live overseas in Asia, and my daughter is in Massachusetts. She can’t come to see us until Christmas. She has cried over Skype video a few times since the end of August because she has moments of homesickness and stress from the pressures of being a college student and an adult, but this is normal, we all know it, and she gets through it. She is finding her way. You are going through this process too, you are finding your way. You must, take care of yourself with food and rest, and give it time.

At least put some fruit and granola bars in your backpack. Apple, banana, something easy to eat when you have a few minutes between classes. Try to take full advantage of your meal plan so you don’t have to spend as much on groceries. I know this is terrible social advice, but study while you eat during true crunch periods.

Yes. That is a very hard schedule. Bio and Chem are pre-med weeder classes, so the pre-meds are gunning for As no matter what it takes. You really need to take advantage of TA office hours, study groups, and any tutoring offered by the departments if possible. My D2 went to a very tough tech focused college, and her freshman year was just crazy busy. She studied a TON, and had very little time for activities. Couldn’t hold down a job, no time. She did manage to eat… but lost weight, no freshman 15 for her. She did take advantage of every single tutoring and help session offered in her classes, and study groups with other students – it is what got her through, honestly. Take any help like that offered!