Of course not! But this is helpful with building initial connection.
Well yes and know. Kids are very different. They may not have many overlaps and billions of interests. My oldest never attends any games at all. Did not do it in HS, and doesnât do it in college now. She only socialize with kids who have common interests with her. If there is nobody around that interests her, she simply reads. She is totally fine in isolation for a while.
OTOH, youngest is very different. She may attend games to socialize but conversations should fit her interests. She is not interested to speak about politics or sport. She as oldest would walk away if person keeps talking about things not interesting to her and move to another crowd. But she needs that other crowd. She will be very unhappy without social interactions. For her social fit is the first most important criteria, especially on campus with only 1200 students in the middle of nowhere.
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Would your daughter join clubs? I would think that would be a way to socialize with peers who share her interests.
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Seems to me that you need to let her have the last word on where she goes to college. Only she can decide where she fits in best.
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Iâve been following this thread from the beginning. What you have been very clear about is that she didnât want a religious school at all, but that she wanted a Jewish presence. Only the Jewish community can create the Jewish presence, so you have to look to that community to credit it, not the schools, and not the christian (or public) schools.
I think she will be very unhappy at Rhodes. The school has not hidden that it is a religious school with some religious requirements. AND you donât like those requirements. They will not change. There will be students there who are very religious and will talk about religion and their churches and their activities at those churches, the groups they belong to, that your daughter is welcome to go along on picnics and canoe trips and beach trips. It is the south. Many students are openly religious even in non-religious schools. At religious schools? Yes, it will be a problem if you want an entirely non-religious experience. Two girls I know who went to Rhodes were (very religious) catholics, and went there to play sports. I think also for the science as father is a dentist so I think they went for science majors. They probably aced those required bible classes.
You said there are a lot of Jewish students who are happy and involved at Rhodes. Those students have accepted the bible class requirements (and, gasp!) might even enjoy them. The subject of religious requirements often comes up on CC whether schools are âreally catholicâ or âreally religiousâ and you were clear from the beginning that you didnât want religion to be part of the curriculum. I admire you for not bending on that even if a school would have offered your daughter merit aid or was the right size or offered the right major. It was important to you to not have a religious requirement. I always say that all are welcome but you have to accept the requirements and you arenât going to change the birth control limits at a catholic school or the chapel requirements at Pepperdine. Most schools arenât trying to change you or convert you, but you arenât going to change them either. Why go to a school where you disagree with their tenants or mission? Why go in knowing you arenât going to feel comfortable?
You donât like the policy of not accepting the community college classes. You donât think their policies are fair or clear. You think the school is too far away. And you are entitled to all those feelings as it is your money paying for college.
The negatives are adding up. Donât be miserable or angry. I donât think you are just grumbling that things are as you want them (as I might do) but really unhappy with the bible requirement. There are so many colleges in the US and sheâs been accepted to a lot of them, so pick one that doesnât make you feel mislead or tricked into going there. Pick one that doesnât have bible class requirements, that will accept her credits so she can graduate in 3 years rather than 4, that are closer to your home. You might have to pay more, but thatâs your option to get what you want.
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AhâŠ.but the rub isâŠto accept the LECOM guaranteed admissionâŠthis kidâs acceptances to Rhodes or Juniata are the only undergrads with the LECOM connection.
I think this student can be happy anywhere. And she is attending college.
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As a @thumper1 said the problem is LECOM acceptance that we did not expect. DD really wants to take it, since she is sure that she wants medicine, and passing on no MCAT and relatively low tuition in LECOM sounds kind of stupid. I spoke with many people familiar and not with DO programs. Many were not sure about Nova, but all agreed that DD should take LECOM given the competitiveness now to get to medical school. DD is smart and capable but she is not a superstar, and getting to medical school the traditional way would require a lot of effort. Plus medical school is going to be stressful anyway, avoiding the stress of applying can only be a plus.
Between no (or very few that we canât find) Jews in Juniata and some Jews at Rhodes with the significant Jewish presence in Memphis (including Chabad 20 minutes from campus, and she is taking the car to college) and Hillel (joint with University of Memphis), Rhodes kind of wins⊠As I mentioned above in terms of Jewish life both places are not the best options. We are just out of choices⊠On the other hand, I do not believe that DD will be unhappy at Rhodes. Their Hillel is relatively active (it is dead at Juniata). DD has a strong connection with the Jewish community and she has no problems with people from other cultures. She is not going to be converted at Rhodes for sure. She also already became friends with several kids who committed to Rhodes snap chatting with few. Surprisingly not all kids are from the South. She easily found a girl from LA, another from Chicago, one more from Boston, and a guy from Austin, TX with British roots. They chat non-stop. She should be fine. She will find her crowd at Rhodes.
BTW Rhodes has a Jewish scholarship to support active Hillel and Jewish Studies minor too.
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So, has the decision officially been made?
Yes, she does not want Juniata. So we have only Rhodes left and she likes it.
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Great update- I wish her well. I am sure she will find a great group of friends wherever she decides to go (although sounds like Rhodes!). She is so fortunate to be able to go direct with LECOM.
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Sounds like she had landed in a fantastic spot with Rhodes (even with the negatives you noted) and LECOM. Congratulations to all!
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Congratulations on Rhodes and LECOM! Sounds like a great success for your D!
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Congratulations! It sounds like she is already making some good friend connections. Everything else will fall into place. At this pointâŠjust say âwhewâ.
Looking forward to hearing great reports from Rhodes!
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wow - 2,000 messages and just like that⊠itâs over 
This was a good one - and i hope she loves her time!!
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Congratulations to your D! May she enjoy her time at Rhodes and have the experience be everything she hopes it will be.
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Excited for your D23 and you!
Now the bargain hunting for flights to and from Memphis begins!
Thanks for taking the time at various points in this journey to educate us! I had never even paid attention to DO and I am happy to report I see several who are fabulous!
All the best.
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Yep, Iâve never expected such interest to her search :). Somehow it resonated within the community. I hope our âmistakesâ will help some kids too to navigate this crazy process.
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You got to an answer. It was an adventure youâll always remember.
The great ones make mistakes and we all learned a lot (or most of us).
And it goes to show, give the schools on your list a chance - because you flew to Denver to get to Rhodes and it seemed unlikely.
I had my money on Gettysburg - yet you found Rhodes right - and Iâm guessing transport will work itself out too.
Awesome story - I go to Memphis regularly from Nashville and i bet sheâll find a friend to bring her at Thanksgiving, etc. if it makes the flights home easierâŠitâs not that far
Congrats on ending the journey.
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Thanks! Yep, bargain-hunting flights will be on my priority list. DD already found a workaround. She said: "Mom, I will fly to Newark, NJ. It is cheaper to fly, and I can see my cousins. You can drive there to see me " She probably will also fly to see her older sister and one of her best school friends in Atlanta who happened to be in the same college for next yearâŠ
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I have followed your college quest closely. Glad sheâs made a decision!
As far as air travel, Little Rock, AR is only 2 hours away; check flights out of LR, also. Easy drive.
Be sure to visit the Memphis ZooâŠit is outstanding! Very close to Rhodes, if I remember correctly.
Iâm sure St. Judeâs would love to have her volunteer. Great way to dive into the medical field.
As the mother of a current college senior, graduating in a couple weeksâŠlet your daughter take over from here. Itâll be fun to watch her soar! These 4 years have truly flown byâŠ
Good luck to your girl!
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