So Frustrated!!!

We are midwest. If you are on a limited budget (very similar to us with a $10k/per kid per year budget) – I’d encourage you to look closely at travel costs because fly-over states are pricey for travel.

They add up for us as there are so few non-stop flights; airplane tix are pricey with lots of transfers and limited airlines. We told our kids to only look at schools within 7 hr driving radius, or at a major airline HUB city that an airline flies to from our city. Travel is just not cheap from low population areas!

I think your daughter’s stats are nice! well done to her. Remember, If your income is less than 160K (married), you can take the AOTC of $2500 each year for costs for books & tuition. But, you can not use travel for those costs.

I hope some more scholarships from Arkansas come through for you!

@scotlandcalling

the thing is, OP’s D’s stats WILL allow a school like UAH to be close to free. full tuition + housing for 4 years (the housing is if they accept the weighted GPA which I think they do). if your GPA + ACT/SAT are high enough there is somewhere that will be nearly free to attend. if stats are not high enough there is community college, which has been a great option academically and financially for my D.

@Lindagaf I agree with you – my step daughter was/is an excellent student. We had to fight with her to get her to comprehend that she wasn’t ‘special’ in the eyes of colleges, that there were many many students as talented or more than she and that she was not going to get scads money thrown her way. It was painful because her (and her GC I guess) kept talking about where she could be accepted and how she didn’t need to worry. Accepted is one thing - being able to afford it (and we have 5 college and near college age kids) was a whole different thing!!

She dragged her feet on getting a better ACT score, and applying to places (and missed scholarship deadlines)-- it was exhausting but now we know and so do kids behind her!

^^^
yes. this. and now the lowly state schools (and the big competitive scholarships) that i insisted my son apply to, are now our top options.

@bgbg4us It is true about travel costs but we are from the East coast and have a child at MSU – the scholarship she received on top of the out of state waiver made the travel costs worth it. Room and Board tends to be less in the Midwest oo

@Wien2NC you had one of these kids too???

@clowncar I totally feel your pain and have the same pain. My son is like your child but with a lower GPA (4.0). He too is getting what my wife and I refer to as the “token” scholarship to bring down the cost. For us it has been a ~$20K scholarship at all the private schools he has applied to. This leaves a net COA equal to $40 to $45K a year. A bit too rich for our blood regardless of what the colleges seem to believe. I was told by everyone who went before me to ignore the sticker price and apply because schools will give good aid. HA, what a crock that turned out to be.

Unless your child cured cancer as a pre-teen, the schools will just lump them with all the other kids in the upper level. I am finding that a child should hit a few benchmarks to help the school with stats - Top 10% of class, GPA over 3.75, SAT over 1400, etc. Once your kid gets into this bucket they get Merit aid but it does not seem to matter if your kid was Top 2% of class, 4.0 GPA, etc. It seems like they all use a bucket approach. Valedictorians and other top achievers get the best merit aid as they should. It is after this that the remaining high achievers are dumped into the bucket.

The only real option for kids like ours are local city schools or community colleges. The others are just too expensive. The advantage to that is they will be top performers and considered “big fish” at the community colleges.

Would definitely consider Catholic schools, @LuckyCharms913. She applied to DePaul recently, but hasn’t heard back.

CC was a real reality check for me. When my oldest D got her SAT scores I thought we were in like flint. Everyone was telling us that she would get a free ride anywhere she wanted. Then I started on this website and learned the importance of a true safety. Kids with my child’s stats weren’t being handed full ride scholarships and frankly there were a lot of them. Get out of the HS bubble where a student is near the top and there are a lot of smart talented kids (there are a lot of bubbles). It helped me relate to her that she couldn’t count on that free ride and made me think carefully about what we could afford. We set a budget and required that she choose at least one in state university she would be happy attending. Until FA came out we were pretty sure that was where she would attend. In the end we had reason for celebration. Had we counted on the financial reach schools to come through the entire process would have been much more stressful.

@toomanyteens


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you had one of these kids too??? <<

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still have him. the warranty expired and i wasn’t able to trade him in.

Keep in mind that it is probably not out of the question for your daughter to earn $5,000/year with job during the summer and over breaks. That increases your comfortable family contribution by 50% (over the $10K you are comfortable contributing) and might be enough to pull in some other options. Once she is on the ground, she might also find other opportunities to really cut costs for future years. For instance, being an R.A. in a dorm usually comes with free board, which is a huge savings. My daughter lives on campus in a Christian ministry’s building, and she eats their leftover food for most of her meals. We pay her rent, but I did not appreciate how much of a benefit the free food would be. She spends no more than $40/week on meals, which is much, much cheaper than any of the meal plan options.

@Ivvcsf Everyone was telling us that she would get a free ride anywhere she wanted.

there is a lot of misinformation out there. You have a lot of people referring to ‘scholarships’ when it is really financial based aid. I had a neighbor tell me her co-workers sone were getting scholarships to Ivies for playing sports, and when I told her the Ivies don’t give out sports scholarships and it must be financial aid, she claimed they give give out sports scholarships ‘under the table’ lol

@MassDaD68 - I do sympathize with you, because the sticker price of many of these schools is shocking, but also think that $20k for 4 years which comes to $100k, is not really “token” money. That’s like getting a 40-45% discount off tuition (not including room & board). Imagine going car shopping and getting that kind of a discount!

As mentioned earlier, some of the western universities can be a really good deal, even for OOS students. ASU and UNM have already been mentioned as places that discount heavily for OOS students with good stats like your daughter. They also have good honors programs, especially ASU’s Barrett Honors College. Another affordable option is U of Wyoming. Deadlines may have passed for some scholarships, though, so check.

Like many others who have already commented, I have a very high achieving daughter and as we don’t qualify for need-based aid, she applied at somewhat less prestigious (but academically excellent) schools because that was affordable for us, assuming some merit-based aid. These included public universities in the west and private colleges and universities in the Midwest. Already she has good, affordable options to consider at various price points and she would have a great experience at any one of them. I’m sure great things are in store for your D as well!

You wrote this in July. Is her ACT 31 or 32…because at SOME colleges that one point would make a difference in merit aid award levels.

@thumper1, ACT is 31 Composite, 32 Superscore. Schools vary as to whether or not they accept a Superscore.

Some other things to think about.

When your child goes to college, there are things you will save by them being away at school. I found that when at home, there were things I paid for that I didn’t when they were away. My gasoline consumption went down for instance. Senior year of high school is especially expensive. No more music or dance lessons.

I found freshman year was the most expensive. Sophomore year also but after that, things became less expensive for me. Freshman year you have a lot of start up costs lol, need to buy stuff for the dorm room. And food was by far the most expensive freshmen year. After that you don’t have to buy that expensive food plan. We also found once the kids moved off campus, it was much less expensive. The kids were responsible for the food they bought and rent was cheaper. Or at least it was easier to come up with the money since it wasn’t in one big chunk.

The more the kids were in college the more they made. This is true especially true for engineering majors. If she goes to a school with a co op, they can make very good money. My S paid for his room and board out of his earnings. We also told our kids that they needed to help and make good choices. They could not unfortunately pick the most expensive living option. They weren’t going to be able to spring break in Mexico. They had to work and that money was needed to help pay what they could. The more they made, the more they were expected to contribute.

Math majors can also make money, not just engineering major. My nephew tutors high school kids in his college town and does well. My niece is a finance major and has had internships which rivaled and will exceed what my kids made in the summer.

What I am trying to say, is that you’ve received some great advice here. But I think she’s a senior in high school and some of her options might be set. But even if none of her options are within what you think you want to pay. That there are options to bring down the cost somewhat. And the fact that she may have to take out loans to get to what you want to pay. My kids also took out loans and we are paying off those loans. But even if they had to pay, they can afford it easily. They took out the Stafford loans that they could, they have great jobs now and the loans are under $300/month.

My D had similar stats and was an engineering major. We did not have any full tuition offers, she was a great student and had great acceptances. But the great scholarship offers were not as great as we had hoped. We weren’t looking for full tuition offers though but private schools that could be as affordable as our state flagship.

@clowncar

Has your kiddo received rejections from most of her applications…or just not heard yet?

“In addition, if you receive merit money and defer, you will most likely not receive that merit money after the deferral.”

That’s not always true. My kiddo took a gap year and all schools that provided merit were willing to defer the merit aid as well.

But, I do agree with others that you don’t defer for a year and apply to a whole new round of schools. Not kosher and in violation.

@toomanyteens wrote:

“…It was painful because her (and her GC I guess) kept talking about where she could be accepted and how she didn’t need to worry. Accepted is one thing - being able to afford it (and we have 5 college and near college age kids) was a whole different thing!!..”

THIS. So painful. Kid could not accept the budget.

In addition, the Peanut Gallery, trying to be encouraging, would say things to us like “But Tulane gives out HUGE merit awards”. Yes, $30K is a lot of money, but it still does not bring the net COA down to where we need it to be.

@wisteria100 Don’t know that particular situation, but yes, the Ivies do give scholarships - they call them grants - under the table to athletes. We just had to show our expenses were significant compared to income (regardless of income) and were offered grants to cover most of the COA. Very select few get it and know it, but it definitely happens. But the kid must be that one in a million athlete with great grades/scores, it is not to recruit joe average player or student.