Social protocol during Covid

Parents Forum Parent Cafe
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oh OldFort, i just feel immune to it all any more. (no, not necessarily to CV, but to all the notifications we’ve received over the last two years having a kid in high school full time). In one ear; out the other any more. for us, the notifications have amounted to nothing.

We’ve been to all sorts of gatherings (concerts, basketball games, graduations, banquets) - I wouldnt bat an eye either way if we received a notice if someone had CV that was around us; or if we didnt receive a notice. It is everywhere, we know this, and are living life as before.

Now, if I had hosted a reception, and had attendees that i personally knew had concerns, I’d probably mention to them someone was positive if i knew about it.

**sorry you got sick. :hibiscus:

But otherwise, i agree with what roycroft mom said, it’s safe to assume at least one covid positive person is present at any gathering of more than 50 people, regardless of testing or notification.

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22

I would definitely want to know. In fact, I attended a baby shower a few months ago and got a text from my niece who tested positive 2 days later. I appreciated knowing because it made me a little more persistent in getting tested myself - I had symptoms for a couple of days before test showed positive. I probably would have stopped testing and assumed I had something else instead of sticking with it and isolating. We had a trip planned to see my daughter for her birthday and I was able to recover AND since I isolated from my husband he did not get it and we were able to make the trip. We also made sure my 88 year old mother was tested and because we caught hers early she could get treatment.

Telling others is the polite thing to do and they can do what they choose with that information.

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23

Last night I attended a small event with strangers, but invited by a mutual friend. The hostess asked all to submit a pic of a negative test.

One of my book clubs has an immune compromised member, so we all just do a test the day of the club.

During the winter, we all tested before getting together.

In my immediate group of friends, we don’t test at the moment. We are all vaxxed and boosted. I know there is a risk, but I prefer living as normally as possible for now.

If I was at a gathering and heard someone was positive, I’d wait to see if I developed symptoms, then test.

If I hosted a gathering and then learned someone was positive, I would alert every person at the gathering. That’s the responsible and considerate thing to do.

I’m hosting an outdoor gathering tomorrow. I’m not asking anyone to test.

I’m watching numbers and if they get bad again, I will adapt accordingly.

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24

About a month ago, I was part of a long-planned and then long-delayed college group reunion. The numbers were better than they are currently. We asked everyone to self-test the day of arrival and as far as I know, everyone was negative.

We still knew there was some risk, but for me, personally, having been isolated pretty much for2 years, I was willing to put up with some risk for the enormous benefit of seeing old friends.

The day after the gathering, one person emailed me to say she tested positive. She didn’t even feel sick, but was going to visit an elderly relative and so tested again.

We immediately emailed the whole group (50+ people) so people could test as they saw fit, or be cautious. I think that is the only right thing to do. I then masked everywhere and even slept in the guest room at home until 5 days passed and I tested negative. In all, there were several people who tested positive and most were asymptomatic.

So informing guests, having them be cautious and re-test, is CRUCIAL to containing spread. Many people don’t seem to understand this concept.

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25

@oldfort hope you are doing ok.

Would you contact people at a function if someone tested positive for another potentially health threatening condition? Something more than a cold? Gosh, if the hosts are friends I hope so! And in this case I absolutely think they are responsible for sharing. People can do what they want with the info.

You’re foolish if you believe that everyone tells the truth or is accurate about testing it even vaccination. If you’re not asking for proof, I think - especially those who are “over Covid” May just tell you what you want to hear.

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26

Just heard from the hostess ( my friend) to let us know that her husband has sent out notification to their guests. It made me feel better.

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27

Telling guests at a party you hosted that someone attending the party tested positive for COVID is the right thing to do, IMO.

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28

In our area this is still such a politicized topic that we just assume no one takes any precautions, so we just avoid gatherings for the most part.

I don’t think it’s unreasonable to expect to be notified if people attending an event test positive soon after, but I know that my D would disagree. Her MiL was sick recently with symptoms that could very well have been Covid, but she never tested. We only heard about it in passing from SiL after his mother was nearly recovered. SiL attributes all respiratory and digestive problems to allergies or changing weather, and is unlikely to ever test or avoid being around family and friends.

Our builder and his wife, who we learned this year are (politically) anti-vax, contracted Covid last month. She’d been sick for a while before he started running a fever. He met with H a few hours before checking his temp and called me afterwards. They tested after that and avoided being indoors with anyone for five days. At least they alerted us.

We’re unhappy about the prospect of getting together with D and SiL, plus his parents, next month. Unlike the holidays and birthdays, it’s not something we can skip if we hope to continue a relationship with GD. All four adults are anti-vax and anti-mask. My one consolation is that it will be a little more than two weeks before our immunocompromised son and his wife visit us, so we should know if we’re in the clear then.

Not everyone is content to be as reclusive as we’ve been and I do sympathize with those who have to deal with this.

29

Thinking about pre Covid, and what I would do. I host Thanksgiving every year; several years ago, one of the guest came down with a stomach bug the next day. As I was wondering if there was any chance it was food poisoning, I checked in on each family to see if anyone else was ill. I thing one other person was not well, but in checking what each had eaten, we all came to the conclusion that it was just a stomach bug.

As we had elderly and infants in attendance, it was the right thing to do to notify everyone. Luckily it was a 24 hour thing, and everyone was fine.

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30

@snowball exactly. I got strep throat while at a family gathering for a 90th birthday. When I started to feel lousy, I went right up to my room and never saw anyone again. They all left and we locked up (this was at a private residence). After I got the positive strep test, I let everyone know…and especially those who dealt with the 90 year old…strep could have killed her…and she would not have been able to tell anyone she felt ill.

I thought it was the responsible thing to do.

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31

Personally, I see no downside to informing guests if there is anyone who is ill after a gathering you host. It seems the most thoughtful way to optimize the health of everyone. This is especially the case where there are especially vulnerable people who were in attendance.

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32

Probably most unvaccinated people have been infected, so they are probably at the baseline of prior infection, which is probably similar to one dose of vaccine (i.e. not great).

If an event wanted to require stronger (but still not 100%) baseline immunity of participants, it would require boosting up to at least three doses when eligible, unless someone has had both prior infection and vaccination.

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Rapid testing immediately before entry would reduce the risk of contagious persons entering, but it seems that hardly any event (or health care location, etc.) does this. Instead, any testing requirement is typically PCR test within 3 days before, which means that people will do it 3 days before to ensure getting results in time, but then can get infected within the 3 days between the test and event (or could have a pre-detectable pre-contagious infection at the time of testing that becomes contagious during the 3 days).

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My daughter tested positive after attending an outdoor wedding. Her husband let the groom know. I don’t know if they sent anything out to the other guests. My daughter knows at least one other guest also tested positive. My other daughter said her mother-in-law got notified of a Covid positive of a guest after attending a wedding.
I think the hosts should definitely let their guests know. We aren’t hosting any events in the near future but for small gatherings we have been to with friends I’m. Ot seeing any requests for testing prior. When my daughter got married in the fall we asked that guests who weren’t vaccinated get a PCR test prior. This was during Delta when vaccinated guests were considered safe.

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This website attempts to measure the risk of there being at least one covid positive person at an event, depending upon the US county and the size of the group. You can also add the impact of the percentage of people vaccinated. I’ve found it helpful in evaluating risks for myself.

https://covid19risk.biosci.gatech.edu/

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I still think vax status is helpful, since it seems to track other cautious behavior. I don’t think that being unvaxxed at this point means you are less likely to have it because you had it before, since so many people are getting infected multiple times. NJ has added a tab to their Covid dashboard that shows infection by vax status, and during the Omicron peaks, unvaxxed were getting it far more than vaxxed. (Also hospitalized and dying more).

A little over a week ago, a very long-standing, cherished family friend was coming through our area. We hadn’t seen him in years because of pandemic plus he lives out of the country for the most part. He is heavily into natural health and had on FB questioned vaccination safety, and constantly listing all the vitamins, tinctures, and other elements he prefered. But he also works for the federal government, so I thought at some point he’d be vaxxed.

Still, love him but don’t see that the same way. He wanted to stop by with his partner. Said he’d test an hour before. We decided we’d stay out side on porch, ran fans, kept windows open for bathroom stops etc.

Showed up, said as we were settling in that he’d tested YESTERDAY not today. We kept distance and relied on the fact that they’d been exposed before and probably had it in the past at last once. He mentioned that he was probably going to lose his job because of the mandate which confirmed he wasn’t vaxxed. Seems nuts to me but…

Anyway, next day he messaged to say that the evening before his partner had felt ill, tested now and positive, pretty ill. I was livid. If they’d tested day of, she’d surely have shown positive and they wouldn’t have visited.

Three days later he was very ill too. They’re both recovering, but though I love this friend, who’s an otherwise brilliant guy, I am flabbergasted by his choices, and annoyed still that he didnt take the chances of having it/spreading it seriously.

Me, H and sister (who’s medically fragile) were testing every day as my kids and their families were supposed to visit for Memorial Weekend. Bought a high level air filter, kept house aired out, tested each morning (got PCR’s too) because of unvaxxed 3 and 1 grandkids.

Thankfully, all negative. I for one don’t take it for granted that I or my loved ones will get ill, and have no patience with those who do.

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