Socio-economic differences between college and high school

Parents Forum
1

<p>Thiswas touched on a bit in a thread about spending money awhile back, but I found it to be an interesting enough topic to warrant its own thread.</p>

<p>I went to a huge public HS with a definitely "money" culture to it. While there were probably some lower income kids, it was not uncommon for kids to drive luxury cars like BMWs, Lexus, Infiniti, etc. (albiet many were used/ hand me downs) and designer clothes were more common than not (even the less fashion-conscious kids sometimes owned some Abercrombie and Fitch). The kids were by and large very nice and accepting, but the student body in general definitely reflected money (for better or worse).</p>

<p>My university is completely different. I have yet to run into a single luxury car or even a recognizable A&F tee. Almost all the kids here work (I'm trying to get a job myself) and a lot of the kids are on Pell Grants. The cuture here definaitely has a different feel to it. People pretty much wear whatever they want, go shopping less, etc. It's difficult to put into words, but in general, there seems to be far less pressure to buy and spend and do expensive things.</p>

<p>How do the socio-economics of your kid's school differ from that of their HS? Does this affect the social scene or feel of the school? If so, how?</p>

2

<p>My youngest son has had the opposite experience. His HS was very diverse with students ranging from public housing to McMansions. Cars in the HS parking lot were most generally older handed down family cars or used SUVs or trucks. Dress also ran the gamut, but nothing high designer label.</p>

<p>In college most dress in designer labels (even the backpacks), cars in the lots are newer higher end models.</p>

<p>Many students at his college receive some type of scholarship money and many do work/study, but I haven't heard of many working off campus.</p>

<p>It has been a big adjustment for him.</p>

3

<p>wolfpiper, your question is very intriguing!</p>

<p>My daughter is in a high school with a socio-economic bracket similar to the one you describe.</p>

<p>I'd be interested to hear how you are finding the change.</p>

4

<p>My experience with college: the playing field is leveled.</p>

5

<p>My Ds' h.s. is mixed, though mostly upper middle class. The students seem to have better cars (bought by mommy & daddy) than the teachers. But I have noticed a trend lately with the clothes being not so "designer label" as they were a few years ago. Except for those expensive Hollister items!</p>

<p>My D who is in college has found a mixture - some kids come from affluent families and they have nice cars - but it's no big deal if you do or you don't. The big thing she has learned is that no one really cares about your clothes - especially in class. Most kids seem to just roll out of bed and go to class in whatever they slept in - or throw on a sweatshirt or something. When she was home, she used to spend so much time getting her hair "just right" and fixing her face - now she throws it up in a messy do and - forget the makeup! (Except of course when they are going out to a party).</p>

6

<p>My two S's high school has lots of kids driving expensive cars and wearing expensive clothes but the other half of the population comes from a less well off part of the county. It is by and large a racial divide devised by the school system to provide diversity in the school. Each group pretty much hangs with their own kind so to speak.</p>

<p>S1 attends a large state u. With 30,000 students, there is every kind of fashion you can imagine. I don't think the need to have a shirt with the right name on it is as prevalent there (unless you are part of the Greek system) as it was in high school. Both of mine were very into the name brand thing in 9th and 10th grades (trying to fit in?) but after that really didn't care that much (and both drove really old cars). All of their friends are jeans and t-shirt guys. Most have jobs.</p>

7

<p>Wolfpiper, my D attended a catholic high school with mostly working-class parents who fully expected the tuition paid for high school to leverage out into free rides to the flagship U, which, in most cases, that's exactly what happened. Very few of the high school students owned or drove cars, and if they did, it was a matter of a "shared" vehicle or else a very used or handed down car. Clothing wasn't a comparison issue as everyone wore uniforms. </p>

<p>College is totally different - many of the students are very, very wealthy; often, on campus, my daughter will park her 10 year old handed down Ford with 120,000 miles next to a Mercedes, Porche, BMW, and in a few cases even Bentleys, Lamborghinis, etc. Clothing of course my daughter cannot even come close to having what some of these kids have. As far as housing, some of them living in $300 million condominiums that their parents bought for them, to live in now, and as investment property later. </p>

<p>The social scene doesn't really appear to be that impacted though, as everyone seems to find and enjoy their "circle" - and my daughter has friends mostly in the higher end of the spectrum, driven there by sports and academic interests. </p>

<p>In my view, time seems to be more the determinant to social configuration than money, in that the young men and women at the upper end of the economic scale do not seem to work, so they have more time to attend social activites - D turns down lots of invitations to various things primarily for lack of time; secondarily, for lack of money. </p>

<p>She did point out to me recently that she is the only one of her "circle" that has never been scuba diving - not that she particularly cares to go, just as a point of reference. Of course, scuba diving takes up a lot of time, and is very expensive from her perspective, and it's not a priority in terms of where she invests time OR money. But these young men and women can mostly go on a whim, whenever they wish, and most of them are even certified. </p>

<p>But in any case, it doesn't matter - no one seems to be counting or caring very much about who has what, or how they got it, or how much of it they have. One very close friend of D's has great difficulty making his money last through the month and having enough to eat; others are wealthy beyond anything we can fathom; all appear to be equally happy and with plenty of friends and interesting, exciting futures ahead.</p>

8

<p>
[quote]
$300 million condominiums

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</p>

<p>Holy cow! Where are these condos?</p>

<p>There is no parking where S lives, so cars are not status symbols. There probably are Prada bags and Jimmy Choo shoes, but S would not know the difference between a Prada bag and a $50 one. </p>

<p>
[quote]
But in any case, it doesn't matter - no one seems to be counting or caring very much about who has what, or how they got it, or how much of it they have. One very close friend of D's has great difficulty making his money last through the month and having enough to eat; others are wealthy beyond anything we can fathom; all appear to be equally happy and with plenty of friends and interesting, exciting futures ahead.

[/quote]
</p>

<p>This was true for S in hs and remains true in college.</p>

9

<p>My children were raised in a culturally and economically diverse community in MA. There are public housing projects in our town and million dollar homes. My children are true New Englanders and really appreciate the value of a buck. While they might admire something expensive (it would be a different set of items for each), they would not necessarily want to spend the money for it. They weigh major purchases. I can still remember the little "speech" I would give before we would go back to school shopping when they were little. The major points included: 1) We look at sale racks and 2) If mommy buys something for one and not the others, it does not mean mommy loves that one best. It means mommy found a DEAL! One has graduated and the other two attend relatively affluent schools. We actually talk about this topic frequently. My son thinks it is a joke that people would "waste" their money on so much "junk" (his words). I think it is a little more difficult for my daughter. She is more of a fashion horse, but it is hard to shake those old New England frugal habits. I think it helps her to know that we can afford those things, we just choose not to "waste" our money on the "junk". She is a major shopper, but she really watches for sales. She manages to hold her own with her very affluent crowd.</p>

10

<p>
[quote]
some of them living in $300 million condominiums that their parents bought for them

[/quote]
</p>

<p>This would be Ares College on the lower slopes of Olympus Mons, right?</p>

11

<p>D attended expensive prep school- I didn't notice cars- they didnt have a parking lot ( urban)- most kids if they even had cars had golfs or rabbits or little trucks. Clothes- again- didn't notice- no real focus on brand names- gap & old navy were popular.
College- some people on aid- some had trusts to pay tuition, they all dressed out of the Bins ( free clothes)- trips were where the difference came in.
One had asked D to visit him during a holiday break across the country & when she said she didn't have the money- he thought she could just ask parents for it.
But most things around campus are very low cost-free, so it doesn't impact social activities- also some have work study and some dont-some are on board and some scrounge- but you really couldn't tell who( parents) has money by looking at them</p>

12

<p>wolfie, I moved to whole country with a decidely lower material interest. It's weird at first. Obsessing about this or that product is an American pastime. I've never been a a shopaholic or anything similar--but when Consuming virtually disappeared from my life, I wondered what would replace it. </p>

<p>Now, I'm astounded when I go home. There are so many cool things to buy in America! My mind starts filling up with thoughts of buying. By the time I leave, I am almost back up to American levels of consuming. Any other ex-pats have this experience?</p>

<p>I bet Billings has a lower level of consuming and that is reflected in the student population. Don't let those farmers fool you. They are often quite wealthy.</p>

13

<p>S's high school and college are identical--both appear to be overwhelmingly middle to upper middle class. Kids from high and low-end socioeconomic backgrounds are the equivalent of the campus spice in terms of numbers relative to the whole. </p>

<p>S says nothing costs money, except laundry machines. I know I was thrilled that all of the sporting events are free to students at his college. We certainly don't have that at the high school or at my old college. First years can't have cars, but cars in the high school and college parking lot look pretty ordinary. He drove a 10-year old Honda Civic in high school, now 12 and passed on to S2.</p>

<p>As for clothes, S1 is particular about his look--reads Esquire and other men's magazines--but doesn't spend a lot to achieve it and definitely goes for off brand names and sales. S2 wears one pair of old jeans and a series of plain white t-shirts. A sweatshirt gets added to the ensemble in mid-winter. Won't go near a store and won't wear anything anybody else buys for him. As he has grown, the t-shirts are pretty tight, have a few holes, and are not exactly sparkling. Every once in awhile I can sneak in a new batch if broken in by H first. He will dress up when required without fuss as long as the clothes have been purchased in his absence based on a guestimate for fit--no advance trying it on before the event. </p>

<p>Their choices in clothes, cars, restaurants, and other entertainments are based on personal preference rather than financial necessity. When the civic needed a second new transmission (due to a lemon replacement), we tried to buy them a new car and both boys said they preferred that we replace the transmission again and they keep the old one (which we did). S2's group chose to go to a low budget Mexican restaurant for homecoming, while others went to high-end steak houses and everything in between. From what I can see, kids who splurge on the fancy dinner (or brand names clothes) may have less discretionary income than those who prefer the more modest setting or attire. </p>

<p>As EK mentioned, we do place trips in a different category. We strongly encourage the kids to go overseas regularly, with or without us. S2 will go to Russia over spring break this year with his history class.</p>

14

<p>Cheers, I shop when I am home in the summer, that cuts down on round the clock consumption. But yes, America is shopper's paradise. Recently, I haven't returned for the Christmas holidays and my son has been coming "home." He brings things to me that I would like at that time. I have one store I like where I get my tops in the states and I buy some things from catalogs. I was never much of a clothes shopper. He is similar to me and seems to have really cut back due to (I think) the influence of his girlfriend who is very price aware.</p>

15

<p>My middle school was in the middle of the ghetto. A pedestrian bridge stretched across the highway to connect the 'hood and the middle school; this bridge was usually populated by drug dealers. We had a lockdown at least once a month, and a wounded gunman ran across our campus after a shootout across the street. Three of my classrooms had bullet holes in the windows. </p>

<p>My high school was approximately 40% black, 40% white, and 20% other, with students from over 80 countries. Most students were middle class, and quite a few were below the poverty level. There was a considerable buzz on campus when the assistant principal's daughter drove her new Hummer to school. There were usually several fights a week. One day police officers were posted on every hall because it was rumored that the Mexicans and the El Salvadorans were going to have a gang fight (they'd had skirmishes before). The year after I left, two girls got in a fight, and one stabbed the other with a butcher knife.
<a href="http://www.wcnc.com/news/topstories/stories/wcnc-ad-3_10_06-weapons.10fce08c.html%5B/url%5D"&gt;http://www.wcnc.com/news/topstories/stories/wcnc-ad-3_10_06-weapons.10fce08c.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p>

<p>Needless to say, coming to college was a tremendous culture shock. What they call diversity doesn't seem diverse to me at all, and there is a much greater wealth disparity among students than I'm used to. I'm constantly irked by professors who want us to buy a lot of textbooks that we don't really use (or similar expenses), claiming that if we can afford college, we can afford extra costs. Many don't seem to realize that a lot of us are on financial/merit aid.</p>

16

<p>My high school and college are decidedly different places (socio-economically). My HS was a private Catholic school in a wealthy area of one of the wealthiest counties in the country. Definitely no racial, economic, or religious diversity. 99.5% white, wealthy, and Catholic. Kids got new BMW/Mercedes when they crashed their old ones, had top bands (think Green Day, Ludacris, etc.) play at their birthday parties, etc.</p>

<p>Now I go to a huge public university (UCLA), and even though I know it isn't a hugely diverse student body, to me it is quite diverse.</p>

17

<p>Icarus, your high school sounds like the ones I thought only existed in the movies ;).</p>

18

<p>I had about the opposite problem. I grew up in a smallish town where we had a fair amount of subsidized housing, a lot of people that I considered to be 'middle class' at the time, and a handful of 'semi-rich' people that had 'big' houses that are probably about half the size of these 'McMansions' I always hear people here speak of. There were maybe 3-4 luxury student cars in the parking lot, but incidentally these always tended to belong to the free lunch students. I grew up thinking that making $50,000 a year meant that you were pretty rich, and that $60 jeans from Abercrombie were what people were talking about when they referred to "designer clothing". I also thought that everyone else in the country thought roughly the same thing as well. </p>

<p>I went to a rather expensive private college in the middle of a city, right next to an Ivy, and needless to say I had a bit of a culture shock. The main thing I learned is that everyone on the face of the planet apparently thinks of themselves as 'middle class'. One of my roommates confided in me one day that she was surprised her father made nearly $100,000 a year, she hadn't thought it was nearly that much, maybe only $80,000 or so, which was evidentially a more normal amount to make. I learned that all the clothing that I had thought was expensive before was actually 'cheap'. I remember going shopping with a girl and she bought a pair of $80 shoes on a whim without even looking at the price tag...if it were me, that would have been the first thing that I checked, and then I wouldn't have even picked them up.</p>

<p>For me, it's not really the fact that people make an issue out of brands and things like they do in high school, since half the school is in sweatpants at any given time. It's more of the fact that you're surrounded by people that can be totally careless with money, and they don't stop to think that everyone else isn't like that and you don't want to be the one to point it out and say no, I can't go out to dinner for the 5th time this week, it's too much money. They don't understand why you can't just call home and ask for more. They don't understand why you're not going off to grad school right away. For me, at least, I think it's worse to be around so many people that just don't have to worry about it than it is to be around people who sneer at you behind your back because you wear the wrong brand of clothes, or something. I feel like my family is supposed to be 'poor' rather than 'middle class' now, like I don't even know what normal is supposed to be like anymore.</p>