Did any of you supported career and education of your spouse after undergrad? Do you regret it or wouldn’t change a thing if given the chance?
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Not sure what you’re asking here…
H went to law school three years after we were married. He had been a financial systems analyst for 4.5 years before going back to school. I paid for our usual living expenses, though we downsized to one car, got a cheaper apartment and paid off most of my student loans to reduce monthly expenses. I was working for a large benefits consulting company but not making much. H worked in the summers. No assistance from parents. My job meant H only borrowed for tuition, not full COA.
Well…reverse. I returned to grad school. I had a fellowship but my husband supported me by paying all other living expenses…and relocating so I could get my masters.
And DH actually completed his bachelors after we got married with my support.
No regrets.
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My H moved 3000 miles with me so I could attend grad school. It meant giving up a job he loved, a great friend group, leaving an area he really liked living in to start all over again in a new city.
Five years later, I supported us entirely for two years when he enrolled in an art school program full time. I did not make much money - those were some mighty lean years, but it enabled him to pursue a passion and create a career path he loves. No regrets!
Monetarily or emotionally supported? I gave up a heck of a lot of my own ambitions to follow my then fiance and now H all over the country to support his career. Would I do again? Yep - we have a great marriage, a great kid, and I’m very blessed.
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Just as I turned 30, DH and I moved to from MI to MA so I could attend business school. It was a huge mistake (another story), but we stayed in MA for ten years after I left the program because we fell in love with New England, so it wasn’t a total loss. I do regret incurring the cost of the tuition we owed, but DH never blamed me.
22 years ago, We moved to another state right after our wedding at ages 22 and 24 so that my spouse could complete a master’s, PhD, and postdoc. He had full funding, but the assistantships were only around 14,000/year. I worked full-time, and while the salary was terrible, the health insurance and other benefits were wonderful (and I still work for the same organization). We also had our first two children while he was in graduate school. As @DeeCee36 said, those were lean years, but I wouldn’t change a thing.
Yes, I supported H through grad school. My son is supporting his wife through grad school. No regrets at all. But I’m sure questions like this take a different turn if you aren’t sure of the strength of the relationship.
If the question is more about the title(financially supporting a GF /BF ) that is far different than a spouse supporting a spouse, in my opinion, due to the lack of a lifetime commitment. Of course not everyone considers it that way.
I do feel it’s different supporting (financially or by limiting your career/higher education options due to cost/location) a spouse vs BF/FF but regardless of if you break up or divorce, its still a loss.
My in laws actually paid college tuition for their D’s BF. They did get married once D, who is several years younger, graduated from college. The two divorced after a dozen or so years, but my in laws never regretted helping him. They could, and so they did, no strings attached.
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7 yrs after undergrad I went back and got an MBA on a part-time basis still working at the time. Ironically my oldest was born the same month I started. My DW supported me during that time.
26 yrs after undergrad my DW went back and got her Masters. I supported her during that time.
I did get to enjoy the time when my two daughters and wife all had homework/studying to do. Although it wasn’t all fun because housework fell on me along with cooking more dinners.
I will say after 27 years of marriage we have always and will work as one unit. We don’t keep money separate where I pay some bills and she pays others. Whoever gets home first starts cooking dinner. Overall it is a team effort for us.
We only had one rule during our marriage. It was if you file for divorce you have to take the kids and all the responsibility/time commitment that goes along with them. I think that fear has kept us together. 
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Well…the first line of the post is about spouses but the title is BF GF. @1Rubin could you clarify which you were asking about? Most of us are replying about spouses.
For the record…I would not support a BF or GF unless we were in a long term committed relationship.
I’m sorry for making it confusing by using spouse instead of partner.
So…which is it. A spouse or a partner. Or both.
Spouse? Yes.
A boyfriend/SO? No. He can pay for his education himself.
BF with plans to eventually marry but no rings or engagement party so far.
He’ll take student loans.
If they are living together, then the SO could provide room and board. But tuition? I would not say yes to that.
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