The B+ student parents' thread

Parents Forum
961

<p>You know, the more places we visit and the more articles I read, the less I think this idea of fear is necessary. With 3,000 colleges and universities we all have to acknowledge that WE are the customer. WE have the checkbooks. Forget about the Ivy League admissions stories, places where only .2 percent of all incoming freshman are starting school this fall.</p>

<p>On her very first college visit (as a junior), my daughter confessed to the admissions officer who was interviewing her that her math skills were less than stellar. His response was, “Have we got the class for you!” How perfectly encouraging! The message was that they valued her and would accept her as is, and that they have the means to deal with her weaknesses. This child who got a 36 on the English part of the ACT but a 23 on the Math is now not afraid of the process.</p>

962

<p>My impression is that when you are not aiming for the top 100 schools, and your GPA is within their top 50%, the schools are looking for reasons to accept you.
I also think a lot of B+ kids hoping to get into Top 20 schools might be happier in a school where they feel they are in the fifth of the class.</p>

963

<p>Great points, people. Of course college students have a blast in NYC; I do try to remind her that this isn’t her last chance to live somewhere, though.</p>

<p>And what a wonderful story about the adcom seeming HELPFUL. My D had something of the same experience at Lawrence, a good long talk (mostly alone) where he gave her the straight dirt - we want you, but more importantly, do you want us? And he told her frankly what she needed to do to be on track and what she could do once she got there. It felt very collaborative, without being sappy.</p>

<p>Thanks, yabeyabe. You’ve been very helpful. She’s liked Vassar for a long time, and we did a drive-by of the campus when we visited Bard this summer which continued to pique her interest. Here’s a short list of where I could imagine she’ll apply, after we’ve made a few more visits:</p>

<p>Reach - Vassar, Carnegie Mellon, Bard (a low reach)
High Match - Lawrence, Hampshire, Kalamazoo, Boston University, American University
Low Match - Goucher, Clark, Muhlenberg, Drew
Safeties - UW schools (doesn’t want to go to Madison, but could get in, probably would choose Eau Claire), SUNY New Paltz, maybe Purchase or UMASS.</p>

<p>I find it hard to imagine a private school being a safety, yet. Need to know scores and Jr year grades first. We are very fortunate that fin aid does not exclude anywhere. That does break my heart for so many kids.</p>

<p>Once she gets closer on the size/location question, the list will change (probably would think about Ithaca, Union, SLC and some others). I think she’ll keep CMU as her “dream”; she just had that kind of feeling, and I’m fine with a “what if?” kind of longshot.</p>

<p>We’ll see Hampshire, Clark and BU in November, will probably drive by Brandeis, too, maybe Wheaton or NEU, too. We’re planning a Balt/DC trip and another NY/NJ trip somehow (before decision time, if not before app time).</p>

<p>Thanks for the friendship. As I’ve said, this is the only place I can chat like this; around here it’s always just “Which UW school do you like?” I respect that and admire the schools, but we feel like we’re in our own world. Our HS has sent kids to Dartmouth, Purdue, Kenyon, Wellesley, Smith, Rice, etc., but it’s only maybe one or two a year. The top kids get massive money from UW-Madison, and most parents figure that’s the end of the decision. If they’re not a top kid it’s assumed they’ll go to the lower UW system and consider themselves lucky.</p>

<p>Good luck with apps, senior families!</p>

964

<p>So, this may be a West Coast problem. My D completely meets the criteria of this thread. My problem is with the “safety” choices. </p>

<p>We live in No. Cal. and D would like to go East (that would be in her parlance of the Mississippi). </p>

<p>My problem is that a lot of the "usual CC suspects’ (Kalamazoo, Dickenson, Muhlenberg, Goucher) have a very high percentage of kids from a 500 mile radius </p>

<p>If she decides to go back to CA they have zero name recognition compared to similar schools out here, .e.g., U Puget Sound, Oxy, Lewis & Clark. Also, I’m worried about the whole social gestalt of a school where a large percentage of kids can get home over a 4 day weekend.</p>

<p>It’s feeling to me like your safety ought to be where you would like to eventually live. Should I encourage her “reaches” and “matches” to be schools where there is a more even geographical distribution and look for safeties locally? Or does anyone know safety schools who have a very even geographical distribution.</p>

965

<p>You have a very apt concern. If her interest is one in which students go to grad school, it would be less of a concern.</p>

<p>I also think many people wind up wishing they had lived in or studied in more than one area of the country.</p>

<p>The 4 day weekend may be less of a concern, as I am not sure how many there are; friends might invite her home with them; some schools have a fair number of international students who do not leave; and some of the schools are near large cities, which would be fun to explore. Are any friends of hers heading East who she could visit?</p>

966

<p>I think your concern is valid, but having gone to a school well away from home and having D1 at a school well away from home, I’ll say this:</p>

<p>1) If your D thinks it’s cool to be in a new place, she’ll get that satisfaction no matter what people at home think. She might even think it’s cool that no one’s heard of it, smugly knowing that it has value they aren’t aware of.</p>

<p>2) Even if some kids leave, if she likes it there, she’ll enjoy the quiet weekends and will find plenty to do on campus. I think true “suitcase” schools are obvious, and these schools aren’t.</p>

<p>3) I agree that making friends and finding activities in that new area will come in very handy at break time, too. Again, if she wants to be someplace new, she will see all of these things as positives.</p>

<p>Good luck!</p>

967

<p>Can anyone give me some good safeties in the Northeast (spec. New England, New York, PA, MD, NJ)? I have a 3.5 GPA with a mix of honors/non-honors courses with one AP course (my school doesn’t offer many AP courses), good EC’s, good recommendations, but a terrible ACT score of 23. I want to major in IR and have a good list of reach/match schools, but not a great list for safeties.</p>

968

<p>Yabe and Emmy: Thanks for the responses. </p>

<p>The way her list is shaping up, her reaches and matches will indeed be quite a bit farther away than her safeties, but most of her safeties still won’t be close enough to come home often on weekends.</p>

<p>Sushi: My D enjoyed the Wheaton (MA) presentation. You could check that out.</p>

969

<p>If it makes you feel any better - we visited U of Chicago on a Saturday - there were practically no students just hanging around the campus (although the library looked busy) and then Kalamazoo on Sunday. I was surprised by the number of students around the Kalamazoo campus that Sunday. Much more than I’ve seen at bigger schools with a wider geographical distribution of students.</p>

<p>We were at Emory a few weeks ago on a Saturday and it was like a ghost town.</p>

970

<p>I realize this is a parents thread, but would appreciate some feedback from others besides my parents…I have a weighted 91 GPA w/ core SATs of 690 V 530M. Some activities (Art Honor Society, literary mag. GSA -elected president of…_ and played 2 yrs of JV girls lacrosse (knee problems retired me). One AP course, all other honors w/ the exception of math, my bain… My college list is as follows:</p>

<p>Muhlenberg, Ursinus, Marist, Wheaton MA, SUNYs New Paltz, Oneonta, Ithaca, Quinnipiac, Salisbury & Washington College.</p>

<p>Am I being to hopeful? Muhlenberg is my top choice so far… Any suggestion? I live on LI and don’t want to be mor ethan about 4 hours from home. Thanks!</p>

971

<p>You have a fine list of good schools. If you apply ED to Muhlenberg your chances will be very good. Many, many girls score much lower on M than V, so do not worry too much.</p>

<p>It is not clear what you want to study, but judging from your list, take a look at Drew; Hobart; Goucher; Union; Alfred; Franklin & Marshall; and Hartwick.</p>

972

<p>I want to study history. My ACT score is 27 Thanks.</p>

973

<p>Thanks. That does not change my thoughts or suggestions and I wish you luck. I do not think any of the schools I suggested are clearly better than Muhlenberg, but they are similar in feel, size and difficulty of admission (much more so, in my personal opinion, than Quinnipiac, whose beauty is by far its strength). If aid is not an issue, and you are sure about Muhlenberg, few schools take as large a % of their class Early Decision as it does and with lower credentials.</p>

974

<p>Fang Jr is a freshman at Kalamazoo. Even though the majority of the kids are within a 500 mile radius of home, they’re not going home weekends, he reports. That was a worry of mine, too, because we’re in California, but it doesn’t seem to be a problem. </p>

<p>Every time we talk, email or chat with Fang Jr, he sounds happy, relaxed and confident. So far it seems like he has found his tribe; we couldn’t be happier with Kalamazoo for him.</p>

975

<p>Thanks Fang. D was jazzed by the K-plan early on, but it seems to have dropped off the list.</p>

976

<p>Qialah, the other part of your query, about name recognition, is a real issue. If your daughter plans to return to the West Coast and has no thoughts of grad school, then she should consider whether it makes sense for her to go to a Midwest or Eastern school no one will have heard of. </p>

<p>On the other hand, in my part of California not many have heard of the Pacific Northwest schools like Lewis & Clark, Puget Sound, Willamette and Whitman either. So choosing a small Midwest LAC wouldn’t be much different from choosing a small Pacific Northwest LAC.</p>

977

<p>Fang: I don’t know her thoughts on grad school–she’s not at this point interested in either law or medicine. </p>

<p>At least in my part of the Bay area, it sure feels like the Whitmans and Willamettes are more visible and therefore better known than the Dickensons and Kalamazoos, but you may be right. Neither probably beats the mid-tier UCs if she wants to stay in CA. We’ll have to consider the size/recognition trade-offs.</p>

978

<p>My son seems to have decided to ED to a school I like a lot, too, but would not be my first choice for him. He ranks my first choice second, as far as I can tell, because it is more selective and he is afraid he would have to work too hard and the kids would be too academically inclined.
I think my preference would help him more in the job market and that he lacks confidence academically because he only started working reasonably hard as a junior.
He wants to apply ED to get the process over with and enjoy his senior year.
My instinct is to let him make his own decision, even if I would not let him make such a huge investment of our money in any other way. Would anyone do otherwise?</p>

979

<p>Yabeyabe2, I’d let him make his own choice, particularly since you like the school and think it’s a good choice for him. This should be his decision.</p>

980

<p>qialah, Whitman and Willamette might be better known than Dickenson (and nobody’s heard of Kalamazoo), but all are so unknown that I don’t think it’ll make a lot of difference.</p>