<p>I'm going out on a limb here, but for any kids other than those very few teenagers who are both lucky and preternaturally focused and mature, finding the college that is the right "fit" is an elusive and unattainable goal, and only adds to the enormous pressure placed on kids experiencing the college selection/application process. </p>
<p>The decision of which college to attend is, unfortunately, made on on the basis of the most imperfect of information. Assuming a kid knows what college atmosphere in which she would most thrive, and that the atmosphere in which she would most thrive is the same for her at 18 as it will be at 21, there's just no way to get a real feel for what her experience at any particular school will be.</p>
<p>Perceptions of schools are based on visits that are dependent on weather, what's going on at the school during visits, which students she meets, beliefs of friends and relatives, ideas about prestige, USNWR rankings, etc.</p>
<p>And her experience at a school will depend as much on her dorm and roommate as anything.</p>
<p>Let's lose the word "fit" in the college selection process, and talk about listing specific objective criteria our sons and daughters value (eg, school size, weather, distance from home, academic rigor, etc.), and focus them on deciding among a list of schools that meet these criteria.</p>
<p>Sorry, but I do not agree. My DD, for example, had criteria for her colleges. They were…in this order…strong science programs, ability to play in the college orchestra and take instrument lessons (not a music major), near or in an urban area, and a pleasing climate. Any school that didn’t fulfill those criteria was not a FIT for her. And we would not have forced her to go to our state flagship where the sciences are strong, no orchestra for her, no instrument lessons, in the boondocks, and has a lousy climate.</p>
<p>Even the BEST roommate and dorm would not have outweighed the negatives.</p>
<p>More important than tossing the word FIT, is that students define what FIT is for them, and realize this could change over time.</p>
<p>BTW, our daughter visited 28 colleges before applying (no we didn’t take that many college trips…but when we went on vacations, we tried to include a couple of visits as well). Some met all of her above criteria…but she didn’t like them for other reasons (didn’t like red brick buildings, didn’t like planting beds of petunias, didn’t like the tour guide, etc)…so these ended up not being good FITS for our daughter.</p>
<p>I don’t think someone with a screen name of alloutforivy – which basically says I value membership in a certain athletic league more than I do carefully assessing strengths and weaknesses of diff schools – is in a position to critique.</p>
<p>Wow, I completely disagree with most of this. But maybe your screen name tells something about how you look at this as well. Both of my kids found schools that were a great fit. </p>
<p>One ended up an LAC that met her “fit” criteria really well:
Strong political science & public policy majors
In a part of the country where she could pretty readily take advantage of internships in her field of interest. The college also offered an internship semester program that is not offered at many other colleges.
The college gave her the opportunity to study abroad in an unusual country she wanted to spend time in. Many other colleges on her list made this difficult or just plain wouldn’t allow it even through other school’s programs.
It was a size that appealed to her – she wanted small class sizes and a student body size of between 1,000 and 3,000.
Good merit aid to help cover the cost.
When she visited she thought the students in the classes she sat in on were friendlier than at most other colleges she visited.
She liked the campus a lot, too.</p>
<p>She graduated Phi Beta Kappa and got a great job though a college alum. And had a terrible freshman roommate, by the way. And it poured cats and dogs the day of her first visit (one reason she said she knew is was a good fit is because she loved it in spite of the weather!). She was perfectly capable of seeing through the superficial veneer and find a fantastic match.</p>
<p>D2 ended up at a school that would NOT be a good fit for most students, but is perfect for her. I can hear how challenged, happy, and confident she feels every time I talk to her this first semester of her freshman year. But a student who was not well aware of the quirks and pressures of her college could end up very unhappy. Also, the weather at accepted students weekend was terrible, her first visit was in the summer when there were pretty much no students on campus (also terrible weather), and she turned down two higher ranked “reach” schools for this particular college. </p>
<p>I guess I do agree that it is possible to break “fit” down in to specific criteria. But I don’t think there is anything wrong with grouping those criteria into the word “fit”. And I disagree that high school students can’t do the necessary analysis to figure out true fit. My kids are not particularly exceptional in that area, IMHO, and they sure were able to do it. Now it did take time and elbow grease. So for students and parents who aren’t willing to spend that, they may not find fit. But it is not some elusive unicorn.</p>
<p>My D could have been happy at many schools. Many had the major, the size, the campus that drew her in to apply. A few, after visiting, allowed her to see herself there, walking among the other students and being part of the community. There is the part that many are speaking of when they use the word fit. Can I belong to this community? Can I see myself here? Not only getting a good education but also participating in campus events, athletics, and community life? Will I find my “flock”?</p>
<p>While the goal of college is of course education, when we live, work, play and sleep at our school there are other factors that are important too.</p>
<p>But all of these things together–plus some others–create “fit.”</p>
<p>As you imply, each person values things differently. I’ve often seen comments here that lists seem ill-defined because they contain both urban and rural, large and small, and so forth, and I often disagree with those assumptions. Some kids have a strong preference for a certain type of location, some don’t. Every person defines “good” weather differently, and cares about it to a different degree. The fact is that kids can enjoy different schools for different reasons, as long as they sufficiently satisfy the strongest needs for that student. The student may not be able to put it into words, but I think they often “know it when they see it.” Some kids have many strong preferences that create a clear fit, others have broader criteria and would find fit at more schools.</p>
<p>BTW, I don’t think there is anything wrong with prestige being among the student’s criteria, although I agree that the presence of “ivy” in a screen name makes me roll my eyes. :)</p>
<p>I do not agree with alloutforivy at all. My older daughter is a sophomore in college and found the perfect fit for her. We visited about 17 schools, narrowed down the list and visited again. She could not be happier.</p>
<p>But this is a large part of what “fit” means. The other part is subjective.</p>
<p>My daughter hated Johns Hopkins from the moment she stepped on the campus for a visit. Nothing would have changed her mind. Objectively, Johns Hopkins met her criteria. But she crossed it off her list. I don’t think this is unreasonable. There were plenty of other schools to choose from.</p>
<p>I agree totally with Consolation - “fit” is just a word that means whatever a person needs or wishes in a school. Whether it is lots of parties, high academic standards, or low for that matter, hot or cold weather, etc. “An elusive and unattainable goal” is when a person insists that all criteria strictly met and no variables are acceptable. That will not be the case in any life, let alone a student’s.</p>
<p>It also means that the person has picky criteria. </p>
<p>A lot of people don’t. Many students care about only a few things.</p>
<p>For example, a student might want a university that has a good undergraduate business major, is not dominated by a Greek system, is not in the South, and allows upperclassmen to live off campus. And those might be the only things the student cares about. If the student has decent credentials, finding several universities that are a good “fit” would not be difficult.</p>
<p>They eek their way through the process. If we can’t use the word “fit,” then we shouldn’t be holding them to preferences for size, location and rigor, either. </p>
<p>D1’s initial factor was “as far from home as I can get.” After that, she refined it to “active Greek life.” Both had zip to do with what she eventually looked for, found, and loved. </p>
<p>Instead of losing the word fit, I’d say, loosen the definition.</p>
<p>I disagree strongly, I think fit is the most important thing to look for, a place where a student will feel comfortable, find others whom she can relate well with, and be in an environment where she will thrive. My daughter picked her school based upon fit (which was very evident during admitted students day) and she is happy and successful there.</p>
<p>Sorry don’t agree. All three of mine were pretty clear about what they wanted and it was just a matter of finding five or six that fit the criteria AND fit them after a visit. It worked. Not “elusive” at all. Kids are going to have fairly unique but general criteria related to all kinds of factors. I would posit that if kids can’t figure out fit they might not really know what it is they want OR they are content with a wide variety of colleges and might be thinking they will have some sort of epiphany when they step onto campus. It’s like the adage “love at first sight”…happens for some but not all but it doesn’t mean if they don’t have the “aha love” moment they won’t find love slowly and in a measured way.</p>
<p>If my D had gone strictly by a list of her requirements, she never would have ended up where she is and she’s so happy there. The college she chose only fit her list by having her major and being in the south, so I was very surprised and concerned when she told us her decision. Now that she’s there, I have no doubt that it was the right place for her.</p>
<p>But “love at first sight” may be infatuation.</p>
<p>One of my kids had this kind of reaction to a college she visited. But on further reflection, she decided that there was an important aspect of the college that she did not like. Despite her emotional reaction to the school, she didn’t apply.</p>
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<p>They don’t have to have preferences for those three things if those things don’t matter to them. One of my kids, who ended up in the Northeast, had Midwestern and Southern schools high on her list, too. Clearly, location was not a big issue for this kid, and there was no reason why it would need to be.</p>
<p>Marian just used this phrase, and I think it is an important one. The list of “fit” criteria a student may have when they first sit down to make a list of colleges is likely to evolve quite a bit as they visit campuses and do more research. There is nothing wrong with that – hopefully it means they are thinking more deeply and completely about what criteria are important to them and what constitutes “fit” for them. But again… there is nothing wrong with the concept of “fit”. It is real and important.</p>
<p>Katliamom, I do think most kids at least try to figure out if their planned major is offered at the colleges they apply to. It may not be obvious to them how to figure out if the program is strong, though.</p>
<p>^^^ except that MOST students go to their state u in part because MOST students don’t know what they want to major in yet, and if they do, they’re usually fairly common majors found at most major state universities. I’m not saying that there aren’t kids who want specific, maybe not-so-common majors. But MOST kids aren’t like that.</p>
<p>Sports, yes. “Feel,” yes. But regardless of the student’s financial situation, it would be unwise to attend a college that does not offer your planned major.</p>