<p>Not saying, or at least I don’t think I"m saying, that the Ivies are bad - just saying that they aren’t the only game in town. The majority of people who go to them are good people - but they aren’t the only good people. And the idea that people who go to Ivies are better than people who don’t - well, no, can’t agree with that one. </p>
<p>Maybe we don’t mean that - every one is equal, etc etc. But if we don’t mean it, why do we care so much. </p>
<p>If my kids want to go to an Ivy, and can navigate the lottery - all good. But if they decide that there is some reason that a different place will work better for them, that’s good too. Either choice will work for them, if they put themselves into it, and 20-30 years down the road, no one seems to care that much where you went - more interested in what you are doing now. </p>
<p>I just want the kids to give it their all, regardless of which college they end up in. If I tell them that they are working toward the Ivies, and then they don’t get in - what then? Did I lie to them? Did I just cause their 3-4 years of hard work in high school to become worthless? Would hate for that to happen, and would hate to see the effect on their trust in my judgment. Thus, I am going to leave the “ivy or no ivy” question up to the kids, and just ask them for hard work and honest decisions.</p>