Here’s some interesting research on how college spending affects middle-class families.
https://www.nytimes.com/2019/08/30/opinion/sunday/college-tuition.html?action=click&module=Opinion&pgtype=Homepage
If you’re like many families mentioned in this article - I know we fall into that category - you’ve spent “the college fund” encouraging your kids to discover their passions and develop their skills. Expecting our children to achieve “middle-class” right out of an MT/Acting program - or even a few years down the road - is ludicrous. Our S is a little over a year out of his BFA. He went to a state school with a conservatory-style MT program for free on a merit scholarship and has no loan debt. After working in a hometown restaurant the summer after graduation, he moved to NYC a year ago and makes enough money (with health insurance!) as a back waiter in a fine restaurant to live with two/three others in Manhatten (he could own a house in our hometown if he had his NY restaurant salary), eat (especially with job perks!), take cheap flights home now and again, and save just a bit more than he started with. He spends most of his free time writing music and is developing a musical. At least one of his classmates is throwing in the towel and leaving NY to go back home after less than a year living “the dream”.
H and I contribute nothing to MT S’s living expenses. We don’t have any extra to give right now. We did contribute some to his two older brothers’ college experiences and are paying on one small loan. We occasionally feed one S who didn’t finish college and is probably defaulting on his student loans. We provide a home for another S who’s wings are taking longer than expected to develop and is overwhelmed with his own student loan debt. Fortunately, neither took out “extra” private loan debt. Both work hourly jobs and are in rock bands that haven’t yet taken off the way they’d hoped. Like many of you, we did everything possible to encourage our boys to follow their passions as they were growing up. The two older Ss are now closer to 30 than 20. We do not see middle class on the horizon for either of them yet.
Interesting piece @mom4bwayboy. I think many people here on CC would definitely object to the author’s use of private school tuition as the “average” cost for a middle class student’s college but I think her research and stories like yours are really important for parents of artists to consider. We all love and support our kids but we also want them to eventually be able to pay their own way in life… and living in the large cities where jobs are generally found is super expensive. We parents need to think of ourselves and our ability to support ourselves in retirement with as much respect as we do our children’s training and pursuit of dreams. It’s very hard to say “we can’t afford this dream school” to an excited senior but being willing to say it might make or break their future because young artists just can’t count on making the money to pay rent and student loans through a “subsistence” job. No one goes into MT for the money … but a consideration of how much money will be available for paying tuition and loans is critical to making a college choice - or even making the decision not to attend college at all.
@mom4bwayboy nice to read your post. I have followed your sons story and we have talked before awhile back! I haven’t been on here for awhile as my D left her MT major this year while starting her junior year at the same college she has been at. Which was easy to do since she likes the school and it’s is a large university that offers tons of majors. Thankful for that .
I agree on all your points made. Glad to hear your son in nyc doesn’t have loan debt. My D won’t either. That is brutal if your MT major has a lot of it. I honestly don’t know how people think their kid will be able to make that payment 6 mo after graduation… yikes. Plus audition plus work a survival job plus keep up voice and or dance lessons etc. in sometimes a very expensive city . I will say it again and again, MT pursuit takes money. Period end of story. You need it or your parents need it. Yes you can survive in nyc rooming with several people and working a PT job but money from home sure is helpful.