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From the lobby, I could see into the room where she was interviewing (glass door) and I couldn't help watching. She looked so animated, so beautiful, so alive.
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<p>Yeppers. At one such recent interview I couldn't see her but I could hear their voices (not words) when they laughed or got excited. Then, when they were walking down the stairs after the interview, D all grown-up looking and beaming, I had this very distinct feeling (not a bad feeling, just a feeling) that they had shared something and I wasn't in on the joke. That they had achieved a mutuality of purpose? a common quest? shared a vision of the future ? agreed to meet for drinks? Something anyway. It was a real growing up moment. For me.</p>
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Has anyone else found themselves unexpectedly weepy at various points in this whole application process?
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Definitely yes. Mostly when I realized that we couldn't really insist that he take one of his full tuition offers, and we were going to have to come up with $45K a year.</p>
<p>Ahhh, Curm and sjmom - you're both bringing back pretty recent memories and I'm getting a bit misty-eyed. But my real 'aha' moment was just about 6 weeks ago when I saw my baby D for the first time since she'd left in Aug. - such growing up in only a few weeks....on top of the changing-before-your-eyes growing over the last 8-9 months! Really stopped me in my (mental and emotional) tracks for a few minutes.</p>
<p>"I have to say, my very favorite part of this process is trying to predict which D I'm working with -- the one who will violently snap, "Who is supposed to be doing this?!" when I offer a suggestion or the one who wails, "Well, do you think you might give me some help or a suggestion for what to say here?!" I've started smiling more which is annoying D to no end!"</p>
<p>Musicmomic -- Thanks for the smile. I have those twins too! My favorite was when she said, "Why didn't you get on my back about this last week? You can't wait until the last minute to harass me about this stuff." </p>
<p>UGH... I feel like I have quadruplets right now. When one twin has a spark of motivation to do apps, the other argues about it. And vice versa. Though generally, neither wants to do them. And we are still visiting colleges since there were so many to see between the two of them. It's just a picnic here trying to keep track of twenty plus deadlines and who we sent scores to ...
(Sorry, but I just needed someone to complain to!)</p>
<p>I'm sure there were many mistakes, but the one I remember is reviewing the copy of my oldest S's Cornell app in January (2001) -- and realizing that he hadn't signed it. He was scheduled for major surgery the week before Christmas, and we had rushed to get his apps done and submitted before then. </p>
<p>I called Cornell right away (wondering if I was dooming S by getting involved, but didn't want to put it off another day, and he had school then theater rehearsal, and wouldn't be home till late.) They were very nice, said apps hadn't begun being reviewed yet, and instructed me to fax them a signed copy. So I had to run to his school, call him out of class to sign, then beg the school to let me use their fax machine.</p>
<p>He got admitted there, but I had a sick feeling in my stomach for several months, wondering how many other mistakes were made that we didn't catch, and how many times we could call an admissions office to correct something before they just toss the application?</p>
<p>'Mudge, as the Dad of an only, I sometimes regret that we didn't have a second so that I could put all the college admissions experience to good use...I can do it better next time!!! </p>
<p>Fortunately, a few people from D's high school have sought me ought for advice on various points and it's been nice to have that "OH, I know the answer to that one!" feeling.</p>
<p>TheDad - Just yesterday, I volunteered - well, begged might be more like it - to help a friend with any info she needs as her Junior son enters the fray. Gotta do something with all this expertise (now that S and gS are safely ensconced)!</p>
<p>Mr curmudgeon - I can top your story. My Mom organized all the application forms for the colleges I was applying to and when it came time to assemble everything (with 24 hours to spare) we couldn't find the forms. (I wanted to do all my apps by hand) After an hour of hunting she looked in the wastebasket in the workroom ...guess what .....in a fit of cleaning up she had dumped all my forms into the trash ...a close shave.........Ill rag on her forever for that !!</p>
<p>My S was still working on his Eagle Scout project Thanksgiving week of his senior year. Not recommended, ahem. During the late autumn weeks when he last-minute visited four colleges and did his seven apps, I was devoting motherly attention (the three minutes a day I spent not thinking about S) by shooting hoops with NIYS (Neglected Invisible Younger Son) and noticed my eyes wouldn't coordinate--about a three second delay on focusing. This was new. Whoah! You have heard of hysterical blindness? Not that bad..my eyes only delayed focusing about once every ten minutes. NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT. Unless you are driving on an expressway. Went to the doc but didn't show for my CAT scan...I knew it wasn't a tumor. It was College App Fatigue Syndrome. Or Post-Mark College Apps on Deadline Dates Disorder. (Valium might have done the trick to restore my vision, but the only time I had thirty of those babies the plumber stole the whole bottle in 1982.) In mid- December, the Apps were laid out in neat stacks on our DR table like so many long lost cousins, and we stood around and looked at them as if they were mutants. Check, double check on each criteria list for each college, then stuffed them in envelopes, then take them out and recheck. It was like "did I leave the iron on?" times a hundred. Could a little stack of paper really define S as a human being and decide his fate? Yes, they can! The little stacks of paper were bewitched! In some ways, it was also hard to mail the the apps because S can only attend one college, and putting them in the mail meant being one step closer to saying goodbye forever to six wonderful versions of tomorrow. As long as the stacks remained on the DR table, all those futures were still possible.</p>
<p>My S had a great teacher available to review senior essays for commentary, but since S was still rewriting them on Deadline Dates, his essays went in the envelopes unedited. I thought the essays needed cutting, but let's assume his voice came through and was authentic enough to overcome flaws. He and my spouse did get acquainted with the only US Post Office where things can get stamped after 5pm. Those workers were downright decent about greeting them in the dark and stamping the envelopes while they watched. Goodbye children! Fare thee well!<br>
My S did not really believe in his Reach applications, not enough to get Tinkerbell up and glowing again that is, but even so there was grief at seeing the applications enter the mail. He really did attach to each of his prospective schools, and was sad he could not go to each of them. That is the way I hope all of you current seniors feel about your application stacks of paper. Except it would be OK if you Believed in your Reaches, too. Clap your hands!
He got in two Reaches, by the way, waitlisted at one.</p>
<p>For me, who is on son #2, it is different because I have been through it once.</p>
<p>I saw the same thing many of you had during the interview process. When he went to one interview I went also. I could see the body language from a distance and noticed how well he got along with the interviewer. I later asked what they were talking about he told me a history project that he did as a video. Not something I expected in an engineering discussion.</p>
<p>For me the hardest part was right before he left for college. Looking back on it now with him as a sophomore it all seems worth it.</p>
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'Mudge, as the Dad of an only, I sometimes regret that we didn't have a second so that I could put all the college admissions experience to good use...I can do it better next time!!!
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Although we would have liked to have more, DD is an only, too. I must admit that recently I claimed how happy I was that we will never again have to go through this process. I do have friends who are constantly asking questions and advice about the college process. I am happy to share info with them, but am still overjoyed that I won't personally have to go through it again. <em>Breathing a big sigh of relief</em> :)</p>
<p>The second child will be and do whatever the first one isn't and doesn't. So it's no help at all to have gone through it once already. If your first one is a happy-go-lucky charmer with mediocre grades whose main criteria in a college is that it have as many students as possible and not be too far from home or too demanding, your second will get a 2400 and want a small LAC with a strong program in Russian literature, preferably on the opposite coast. The reward for all your hard work comes with the third child. The third one can't possibly be the opposite of two opposites. ;-)</p>