<p>
</p>
<p>This has nothing to do with a lack of empathy but rather displays the hubris of youth, something that has been around since the beginning of time. People with manners do not necessarily have more empathy than people without manners. And who does care what the neighbors think? Seems like things are changing for the better.</p>
<p>"The children now love luxury; they have bad manners, contempt for authority; they allow disrespect for elders and love chatter in place of exercise. Children now are tyrants, not the servants of their households. They no longer rise when elders enter the room. They contradict their parents, chatter before company, gobble up dainties at the table, cross their legs, and tyrannize their teachers.</p>
<ul>
<li>Socrates</li>
</ul>
<p>Today’s youth is more accepting of GLBT people than previous generations, so I’d say if anything, they’re more empathic. It’s easy to cast stones, but I’ll bet if we searched the newspaper archives, they’d have the exact same critiques (rude, only think of themselves, disrespectful) of the teens of the 90s, 80s, 70s, 60s . . . Heck, the 80s teens were the ones called “the ‘me’ generation.”</p>
<p>Darn those kids. Always gobbling dainties and crossing their legs.</p>
<p>Anyone who remembers growing up in the 70’s did not need a study to clarify this point. This generation is without a doubt egocentric and far more competive than our generation. I don’t know if it has something to do with technology and the reduction of dealing with friendships in a more personal way. I feel like this generation is missing something emotionally that we had. Maybe it explains the increased use of anti depressants and general disconnect that seems apparent in so many kids.</p>
<p>I agree with “naturally,” who pointed out that kids in the 80s were called the “me” generation. The college I attended assigned incoming freshmen (hs class of '81) to read The Culture of Narcissism before arriving on campus.
I believe that teens and young adults are naturally self-centered because they are focused on discovering their own identities, figuring out who they are. I don’t think this generation is any better or worse in this respect. In my experience many kids today are more accepting of differences and do have compassion for others.</p>
<p>Naturally, great post! </p>
<p>I think it requires an especially strong set of rose colored classes to “recall” that as a teen one was so much less self-centered. Believe me, your elders thought you were just as bad. </p>
<p>And you were.</p>
<p>Isn’t this basically an equivalent of the Flynn effect? Would it be fair to say that today’s college students are more intelligent than those of the 70’s?</p>
<p>I also took an empathy test because of this article, and I think people are conflating empathy with things that aren’t really relevant to the test. Most of it had to do with ability to notice others’ feelings and how much you’re affected by them. I don’t think that has anything to do with manners or tolerance.</p>
<p>Parents generally get the children they deserve. ;)</p>
<p>Heck, we raised them.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Pugmadkate, I had exactly the same reaction you did. The world is a far better (and far less hypocritical) place if people don’t care as much what the neighbors think, and don’t regulate their lives by it. I suppose there are those who think we’d be better off bringing back the stocks in the town square, but I happen not to agree.</p>
<p>My personal opinion is that tests like this are so idiotically transparent that it wouldn’t surprise me if a lot of kids deliberately give the “wrong” (i.e., non-empathetic) answers just to be subversive.</p>
<p>Our children are growing up in a less kinder and less optimistic America than we did. </p>
<p>I wouldn’t trade my youth years for those of the younger generation for anything.
And that is sad.</p>
<p>A little off the empathy subject, but as a child of the 60s and 70s, I recall doing what today is called “service” (back then, we just called it paper-drives, trick-or-treat for Unicef, collecting for March of Dimes, etc.</p>
<p>But I also remember (not through rose-colored glasses, I don’t think) that we were better mannered in the sense that, to use a phrase that may sound archaic, we knew our place as children and teens. We knew that a 12 year old or 16 year old or even 20 year old was not on a par with an adult. We could have our own opinions, disagree, but still we accorded adults a degree of respect by virtue of their being our elders. That distinction seems lost among many of today’s generation, which seems a shame to me. There’s so much to be gained by teaching younger generations to venerate, respect, and treat with some deference their elders.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>this is harder when the younger generation is watching the older generation run the country into the crapper, and the people who are 12, 16, and 20 are going to be left with the mess.</p>
<p>donna,
Slight clarification- its not a “test”- its a survey. Possibly given within the context of other tasks (just guessing). And it is a Likert scale, and is meant to be “transparent”- it is simply a self report. There is always some response bias in self-rating scales, but often people try to look better, not necessarily purposely screw with the survey on the negative side. And if the students today were purposely screwing with the survey, wouldn’t tht support the premise of the survey? ;)</p>
<p>Also, this survey was but one looked at-- the article says
</p>
<p>Soccerguy, I agree with you on a national level. If I were a kid today, watching our govt run us into the ground leaving me and my cohort to foot the bill (if we even could), I’d be furious. Heck, I’m in my 50s and I’m furious!
I guess I meant on a personal level, though, within one’s own home, school, neighborhood,etc.
As someone else on this thread pointed out, many of us raised our kids with much more interest in their opinions, focus on their feelings, etc, which is fine. I certainly did that, and I intended to. But many forgot to also instill the notion that yes, you’re terrific, but there are many people (mostly grown-ups) who know more than you, have experienced more than you, and have sacrificed more than you --for many of the rewards you now reap. They are worthy of your respect, deference, and mannerliness. (I will admit to being baffled as to how some kids are expected to learn this when I see their parents’ behavior in stores, restaurants, and the like. Many of those folks seem to be missing the chip, too.)</p>
<p>“I see it the other way, actually. Kids nowadays actively think about social issues and helping the community and volunteerism in a way that I didn’t see them doing in the mid-eighties, when Greed Was Good. I also think there is a LOT more sympathy / support / acceptance of kids who are “different” (whether that’s bi-racial, gay / lesbian, in a wheelchair, deaf, etc.) than there was in my day.”</p>
<p>I agree with Pizzagirl. </p>
<p>Some of the nicest, most empathic and compassionate people whom I know are today’s college students.</p>
<p>I agree with inspiredbymusic. It is a developmental task of adolescence to establish identity, and this involves a good deal of self-focus. This is a necessary phase that our generation also experienced. Perhaps we don’t remember what we were really like! It is possible that we have allowed adolescence to be prolonged as people get more education, the age of marriage increases, female fertility is extended, so it seems like young people are in this stage of identity establishment at an age when earlier generations were onto the next stage, and this could affect the results of the referenced survey.
Another task of development during adolescence is to see “gray areas”. It is our job as adults to help them with this challenging task. Adolescents “split” everyone into “good” and “bad” (or “nerd” and “jock”, or “cool” and uncool" or “from this neighborhood” or “from that neighborhood”) before realizing that people and ideas have various attributes and should not be sterotyped or labeled as all one way or another. Unfortunately, many adults have not successfully completed this task and still do this “splitting”, making it difficult for those adults to teach adolescents how to successfully make the transition to nuuanced thinkers about issues, and to accept and appreciate people.
Anecdotally, I see very empathetic young people who want to go out and serve the world (witness the number of young people applying for programs like Teach for America, for example). And, I DO NOT blame an emphasis on “self esteem” for creating narcissism. On the contrary, I see kids who were constantly berated, especially in early childhood, and told that they were not good enough for anything as the kids who are the least empathetic, who fight, and who have relationship difficulties. Children who were not respected eventually do not respect others, and unfortunately patterns repeat themselves for generations, unless people make a concerted effort to change these patterns.</p>
<p>^^^You’ve made some great points, levrim.</p>
<p>I think some of the comments made are based on regional location. As a NJ native who transferred to TN, I see a huge difference in what is “acceptable” in terms of manners & mores between the two teen populations, especially on Facebook profiles (D has about 1/2 of her FB friends from NJ & half from TN.) </p>
<p>When the floods hit Nashville earlier this month, D & every other HS kid I knew jumped in and started helping: tearing out drywall, moving furniture, hauling out wet insulation. That theme was mentioned in almost every program/speech during the past few weeks graduation events. And at the university she’ll be attending, the honors program is rooted in service to the community.</p>