Hi everyone, I go to a private 4 year institution and I am not having the best time. The first week here - I had panic attacks every day, which makes sense since this is the longest and first time I’ve been away from home and my family. I got through that and told myself to make it until the end of the semester and see then how I feel. I went to disability services and got help with a therapist even and then it got better. September and October flew by, but at the end of October, I found myself seriously down in the dumps. I’ve made some good friends and gone to parties, joined a club and am trying to involve myself. I just don’t feel good. I want to go home SO bad. I don’t know what changed, honestly. The weekends just go by so slowly and I find myself lonely as hell. I just got a job so I am getting ready to start but I’m nervous about that, too. I only have one week until I get to go back home, but I can’t wait. I’m going crazy. I want to get out of here so bad. The academics are so good and I wish so bad I could stay and finish 4 years but I think I would lose my head. I want to transfer closer to home and be with my family. Seeing my roommates go home almost every weekend breaks my heart because I want nothing more than to just do the same. I am slowly dying here, I’ve almost never felt so low. So I’m wondering, is it viable to transfer after one semester? I have had good grades and am filling out applications right now, but I’m just wondering if it could work. I need some hope and help. Please.
My heart goes out to you. 20 years ago I felt exactly like you when I started at UCSD. It seemed that all of my friends from high school were having the best college experiences and I was SO down in the dumps and as you put it, lonely as hell, in La Jolla. I did what you did…joined a club, made some friends and really tried, but come December I knew I had to make a switch. My parents kept telling me to buck up but after a really tearful call with my older brother he called my parents and said, SHE NEEDS TO COME HOME. After one semester at JC (which I had to do to get into another UC), I landed at UC Davis and LOVED it and thrived. I loved Northern Cal, being an hour away from my family and living in a really cool, small college down. UCSD was just not for me and I NEVER regret making the change. I think it’s important to give things a try but that it’s also equally important to know when a change is needed. Not every school will be a fit. Hang in there and have some really honest conversations and formulate a plan if you leave. Once my parents knew that I wasn’t going to hole up in the house, but go to JC, then to Davis, they got on board. Hang in there!!!
Thank you so much. This helped me a lot. I go to Chapman and am planning on transferring closer to home in the Bay. Even if it takes JC, I’m fine with that. I just need to fix this issue and get my life back together. I always thought I wanted to be as far away as possible, here I am learning that I need to be home more than ever. Hopefully I can transfer by next semester/year and feel better. Thank you again. It really helped.