Transferring to UMD???? Help

After finishing High School my boyfriend and I, currently of two years, decided to both go to Penn State University, University Park. We attended Summer Session and the fall semester together before I had to go home and take classes at a local community college with credits that will transfer.

After spending the spring semester apart, he at PSU and me at Howard Community College, we’ve come together thinking that PSU might not be the right place for us. He is a Nuclear Engineering Major and I’m a Biochemistry and Molecular Biology Major so we’re both pretty nerdy and very rarely do we go out and party. He can’t afford the high cost at PSU and wants to transfer to University of Maryland, College Park after his sophomore year (either at PSU for the year or at a community college that will transfer to UMD).

After about two semesters at PSU I can’t help but to agree with him that PSU might not be where we fit in; however, I am worried that we have not explored what PSU has to offer us fully. I can say that after two semesters I have not made any friends and have attempted to join clubs and attend events such as Late Night at the Hub along with attending football games and basketball games.

I’ve visited UMD on a self-guided tour and have had UMD alumni tell me that I would be a perfect match at UMD and would easily make friends and have fun that doesn’t revolve solely around partying. I do plan on attending PSU for my upcoming sophomore year (with or without my boyfriend) but am still unsure if I should look into transferring to UMD after this year. I fear that PSU is the right match for me and I haven’t found friends yet or where I fit in and don’t want to make a hasty decision.

At the same time I don’t feel like I’ll have fun having to keep up a long distance relationship for 2-3 years and possibly more depending on what my boyfriend and I decide to do after college (he’s committing himself to join the Navy after college). The academic programs are almost identical and besides UMD being much cheaper there isn’t a whole lot else that’s really different. It’s mainly just the environment, demographics, and students that are truly different. I guess when it comes right down to it, I’m asking which is a better fit, what would work out better? I’m terrified most of all of having a horrible college experience and don’t want to end up ruining one chance at making these some of the best years of my life.

Here’s a little about me, just for reference. I love reading and I’m pretty introverted. I don’t really have any strong feelings about alcohol but I’m pretty straight edge and have an extreme dislike for drugs and can’t stand any sort of smoking no matter what it is. I don’t really like illegal things in general. I love sports even if I’m not very good at them and throughout high school fell in love with pole vaulting. I’m short and blonde and while I do wear makeup I’m not really a girly girl and am rarely found in a dress or heels. I dress conservatively enjoying my spandex pants, jeans, and long sleeve shirts. I like to think that I’m the type of person that opens up and becomes super outgoing and weird once you know me, but until then I’m fairly reserved. I like to dance and have fun and listen to loud music like any other teen but don’t believe I need to be drunk or high to do so. I’ve always wondered what things like clubbing would be like but am in a serious relationship and would never do something that would put that in jeopardy. Like I’ve said earlier I’m a pretty big nerd and love science and research and all that stuff. I’m a prideful person and am proud of what I do, proud of PSU and I’m sure if I went to UMD I would find myself proud of PSU and UMD.

@GainsMcGee I’m surprised no one has responded to you. I don’t know if you are still debating or made a decision but I understand what it feels like to make a big decision that could affect your future experience somewhere and being unsure if its the right move to make. I’m a transfer student also, I’m starting UMD in the fall but I’ve lived in the area almost all my life and its where I originally wanted to be. Im transferring from UMBC so its a way different atmosphere but I think UMD, while it isn’t completely quiet campus, there is a lot of diversity and you have the options to do things because we are so close to DC. Also just like with any university, I’m sure they have events and things on campus that may interest you. Maybe also looking into greeklife? Maybe you have never considered it. Maybe you have sworn that you would never fit in but everyone has a place somewhere. And a lot of people feel like they won’t “fit in” somewhere but its all about giving things a shot. And wouldn’t hurt to look into it. The worse that happens is, you remain in the same place you are.

Being an introvert is cool. You don’t have to worry about all that and I’m sure there are plenty of introverts at UMD as well. But with everything, you have to try to put yourself out there and meet new people. Everyone is “new” somewhere and some people take a little longer to fit in or find where they belong than others do.

I think as long as you are doing things that make you happy, you aren’t wasting your college years. If UMD Alumni suggest UMD, might as well give it a shot. PSU doesn’t seem to be convincing you. Of course if you aren’t transferring yet and are still at PSU, continue giving them a shot. and if it still feels like you aren’t fully happy there, then transfer. But make sure its what YOU want.

As for the relationship, long distance is hard but its do-able. It all depends how much the two people are willing to work towards it and each other. I’m in that same boat. Although, I will be cliche and tell you that anything can happen and if you transfer to UMD together and break up (hopefully u don’t but nothings impossible) make sure that you would be happy (break up aside) and okay being there regardless because its what you wanted for yourself and not only because you wanted to be with your boyfriend. It’s hard to think of negative “what ifs” but life is unexpected and you have to make sure that the decisions you make, you will be okay with, regardless of whatever consequence they may bring.

Sorry if its not too helpful lol just my two cents.